Yu-Gi-Oh! 24 - Finished

[Canopy Star - Eon Sphere]

So, uh, what was the conclusion of the Honest clash? Did Sakura lose? Cause otherwise I don't see how the rest of the duel worked. Maybe you used Honest differently. I think Clarissa finishing Yudai off was perhaps better than Sakura though, because her killing him, for all intents and purposes, would seem a bit out of character.

I honestly forgot about Ptolemy until the last minute there. Proof that I need to get back to my Sacred Deck on DN.

I also find it funny that you used the 2 Numbers you explicitly said you wouldn't, that is, 8 and 69. But they both work well, and I was eagerly awaiting Sakura's duel. She (I'm guessing she isn't dueling again) only had 3 duels in the entire thing.

I thought it was Yudai from the end of the last chapter, where there were some big hints about that. Also, family feuds much? I don't think people should be killing their families and friends so readily. I guess someone has been redeemed in my eyes. Can't wait to see Hideo's Deck. I thought Gagagigo (That's odd to type) was his, originally, and that made me think Vanilla. But I don't think so now.

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

[quote name='The Seal of Eon' timestamp='1352306872' post='6063121']
So, uh, what was the conclusion of the Honest clash? Did Sakura lose? Cause otherwise I don't see how the rest of the duel worked. Maybe you used Honest differently. I think Clarissa finishing Yudai off was perhaps better than Sakura though, because her killing him, for all intents and purposes, would seem a bit out of character.

I honestly forgot about Ptolemy until the last minute there. Proof that I need to get back to my Sacred Deck on DN.

I also find it funny that you used the 2 Numbers you explicitly said you wouldn't, that is, 8 and 69. But they both work well, and I was eagerly awaiting Sakura's duel. She (I'm guessing she isn't dueling again) only had 3 duels in the entire thing.

I thought it was Yudai from the end of the last chapter, where there were some big hints about that. Also, family feuds much? I don't think people should be killing their families and friends so readily. I guess someone has been redeemed in my eyes. Can't wait to see Hideo's Deck. I thought Gagagigo (That's odd to type) was his, originally, and that made me think Vanilla. But I don't think so now.
[/quote]

Both players activated Honest at exactly the same time (because it's anime/fiction I can do that; I don't know or really care that much whether you can chain one to another or who would have prioirty in terms of turn player or opponent, but small technicalities).

Sakura's Honest increased Ptolemy's attack by Coat of Arms (2600) - totalling at 5300 ATK.

Yudai's Honest increased Coat of Arms attack by Ptolemy's (2700) - totalling at 5300 ATK.

Monsters battle, resulting in a tie. Coat of Arms survives because its a Number, whereas Ptolemy's is destroyed.

When I first planned it I though they would be both increase by the same amount for some bizarre reason and that Ptolemy's would still be around with 100 more ATK, dunno why. Would have made things easier to see though

I didn't say I wouldn't use them. I said I wouldn't use Heraldic Beasts as a deck for a major duelist with Numbers, because guess what Numbers I'd have to give them (same problem I had with Asami, and why I wouldn't use OOPArts other than in the role I did) and they don't have a boss of their own.

Absolutely no idea where you got Gagagigo being Hideo's from....

[Synchronized]

I genuinely don't know how you do it, Matt. You're an absolutely fantastic writer and you've taken a Yu-Gi-Oh! story and turned it into must-read just based on how well you connect with readers. Sure, there are a few grammatical errors here and there, but unlike with other stories, I don't even notice them because I'm so hooked on the story. It's beyond good and I can't say enough great things.

You've got what, three Chapters left? The excitement with each Chapter is just getting better and better and seeing how you finish this off is something I haven't looked forward to Fan-Fic wise in five years+ on this site.

It was fantastically compelling and I'm extremely jealous of your duel-writing ability.

My only hope is maybe once this story finishes, some of the readers will migrate to D-Accel for something else to read, though it's nowhere [i]near [/i]your level right now.

:3

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

[quote name='- Neo -' timestamp='1352312643' post='6063170']
I genuinely don't know how you do it, Matt. You're an absolutely fantastic writer and you've taken a Yu-Gi-Oh! story and turned it into must-read just based on how well you connect with readers. Sure, there are a few grammatical errors here and there, but unlike with other stories, I don't even notice them because I'm so hooked on the story. It's beyond good and I can't say enough great things.

You've got what, three Chapters left? The excitement with each Chapter is just getting better and better and seeing how you finish this off is something I haven't looked forward to Fan-Fic wise in five years+ on this site.

It was fantastically compelling and I'm extremely jealous of your duel-writing ability.

My only hope is maybe once this story finishes, some of the readers will migrate to D-Accel for something else to read, though it's nowhere [i]near [/i]your level right now.

:3
[/quote]

*Blushes*

Thank you for such high praise. Really glad people are overall enjoying the story despite errors with cards and logical holes in the plot.

Yes, three chapters left. Wow that felt so far away sometimes I tell you, it'll be nice when its over although it will leave a gap.

I recommend it to all.

[Aerion Brightflame]

O.o Third time is the charm. (My computer died twice prior to this attempt) My review will be brief through fear of losing my progress.

The chapter was great, don't get me wrong, but it trailed out towards the end. The beggining was perfect (Yudai... my fething God dude. That was amazing) I had no problems with the error in the summoning of the big big beetle (I didn't notice xD) But i mean the double Honest brings him back? Such a massive cliche. I mean given that Honest did not work with Yudai's deck, it seems more like a plot device than your normal thought out used cards.

The cards used throughout the duel kinda bugged me. Sakura was great, you portrayed her as realistically as you could I think, but Clarrisa using Hope for Escape? I mean really, given that she could only ever draw once from it normally, it just seemed pointless logic wise. Otherwise she did great, and I wouldn't fault her otherwise.

Politician story engaged me for once, Gooooo POSIDERA.

Sorry for seeming harsh about the duel, but it bugged me given my mood when I first read it. So yeah, looking forwards to what I presume is Murtagh vs Death.

And its going to be sad when this is done. I mean this is one of the greatest works of fiction I have ever read, and now I aim to eventually make my own stuff as good as this. Your way of making a story flow, getting us to connect with your characters is fantastic. Make sure you a proud of this when its done, since its an amazing achievement.

And dude Neo's not the only one with a fic. Vanessa says hi and that her holiday was nice.

[Synchronized]

Totally apologetic for asking this here but, you've actually started writing again, Hive? (Though it's still a free bump regardless.)

[Aerion Brightflame]

Yep. I managed to plan ahead what I want to do for the next few chapters, and I'm in a mood where writing is something I can enjoy.

Oh, and I forgot to mention you getting all 3 of the Verz Dragons on the field at once... That was just awesome dude. Really awesome.

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

[quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1352408281' post='6064015']
O.o Third time is the charm. (My computer died twice prior to this attempt) My review will be brief through fear of losing my progress.

(Shortened down reviewing stuff for space and characters)

And dude Neo's not the only one with a fic. Vanessa says hi and that her holiday was nice.
[/quote]

Died as in site wigged out whilst posting (happens to me using wireless) or died as in computer blacked out? Hopefully just the former. I have to make sure whenever I post a new chapter with all the hyperlinks etc which takes an hour to format I have it copied and pasted somewhere because of that.

Behold a year's worth of waiting for this moment! I wanted Greys to finish because I had to get in somewhere, and this was the only chance. I had assumed Clarissa would easily have 3 Inverz left given Yudai would more or less ignore her, but came to it and was really struggling, and didn't want to drag out the last turn pulling out Inverz when Adreus was sitting there doing nothing. Gasath would have worked, but she's summoned that and it would have been flat. I understand that point of view, clearly Death is even worse at brainwashing than Gilag! Hope for Escape is a card I like personally, I've used it twice before in Armageddon nicely enough. All three of them got a different +1 card out and none of them were stupid anime ones, although I can see what you mean given the 4000LP start. She's used worse traps in her deck (Cursed Mirror of Oaths, Hell Blast). It's no problem, critisism is automatically harsh.

Thank you. I'll try to feel happy about it.

HI VANESSA! I want holiday snaps!

[quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1352413433' post='6064072']
Oh, and I forgot to mention you getting all 3 of the Verz Dragons on the field at once... That was just awesome dude. Really awesome.
[/quote]

It had to be done. Just that image of Sakura looking up at them all getting bigger and more heads. Surprised I managed it, thank god Mandragora is such an epic card.

Anyway, not much to say other than it is time. The Beginning of the End is upon us. Except we're halfway through the end. Or somewhere in between. Maybe...

I'm confusing myself. Anyway, if you like creepy battlegrounds, demented bad guys, and horror upon horrors as the forth horseman emerges from the seal, you're about to get them in spades here. Also, fans of any of the smaller archtypes recently taking the casual game... not so much by storm, who haven't seen their favourites yet, you are also in for a treat as another part of the story far away from the horror's of Death's Castle draws to a close.

Two notes about this duel. One: and I'm amazed this hasn't happened before with the banlist change; but a card that was recently banned appears in this duel. However given that this events are all taking place in one day, which I think we can assume isn't banlist change day, it shouldn't be too much of a problem. Two: There is an anime only card that doesn't get so much of a slight edit; but a complete overhaul. I'm more relaxed about this with an anime only card that no-one remembers, but I'll own up to it now. Hope it doesn't detract too much. Anyway, enjoy.

[spoiler=Chapter 23:2]Watching the last moments of the encounter between Pestilence and the two girls disappearing from the white horseman’s arena, the pale knight rose from his throne with a resigned sigh. A part of him knew he shouldn’t be surprised. Despite the careful selection of his brothers, even with the reigning West and East Asian champions, rescued along with Unmai from the nothingness of the beyond as the last of their spirits petered out inside of virtual reality, there was always a small chance of defeat. He should also not have been surprised by the weakness shown in the face of defeat; certainly by that sentimental fool Yudai. But Unmai’s sudden compulsion to seek forgiveness and understanding, and then to have the audacity to turn against him, his saviour who had given his wretched life an actual meaning, had completely blind-sighted him. He was disappointed with himself.

Death turned and left the throne, moving to the next room that housed the stolen Number converter. Still, the horsemen had proved useful even in defeat, even if they had failed to take out any significant number of the group united against him. They had stalled his enemies, softened them up, and most importantly had forced them to duel ferociously with the phantasmal power of their Numbers as they struggled against those he had gifted to his brothers. The results were not in his favour, but in the end, the end that had been drawn ever closer now as he looked at a swirling image that opened at a mere thought and displayed the chaos outside as several thousand degenerating bodies of humans and the warrior like [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/X-Saber"]X-Saber[/url] monsters floated towards the spiral above them, was unavoidable. The final result was in no doubt, and had been from the moment the conversion began. All those people could do now was hasten it in their ignorance. Approaching the converter, Death studied at the cards resting on the plate. Dyson Sphere, Apocalypse Wyvern and Coat of Arms had all returned to rest upon it, but that did not matter. The machine was broken, and if they wanted to wield those forces against him then they were welcome to. If they used them against him, it would only lead to their inevitable demise. Lightly he tapped the two sheathed weapons holstered from either hip as he looked at the chaos outside.

The final hour was upon them, and with it his time to emerge from the seal was now. He was the bringer of the End; in every culture and religion across the world he or something like he foreshadowed the coming of the apocalypse, and now it was time to ride his horse across the flaming sky with scythe in hand, the last sign before the final judgement took all. His shadow would confirm what they must all suspect by now on that wretched Earth. Marching back into his throne room come observatory, the room sealed itself behind him, the knight sat himself down and waited, facing the far door in the darkness ahead. Besides, if you wanted a job done right, you had to do it yourself.

In the end, one way or another, Death comes for all.

...

A solid black door, covered in runes, blocked his path. There was a display panel beside it, a combination of sorts to unlock it, but he couldn’t look at it. He’d been standing in front of the door for a few minutes, having aimlessly wandered across it, but he couldn’t look at the panel. Even if he knew for certain what he suspected, that he needed to pass this door, he just couldn’t. Exhausted and powerless Daiki dropped against the wall and sat, letting his memories replay without making any real effort at dispersing them.

“Daddy? Daddy!”

Daiki looked up as out of the dark corridor to his right, the ever glowing Kaneko came hurtling towards him. Jin was running slightly behind her. Forcing himself to respond to her calling Daiki sat up and allowed her to hug him, wincing as she tackled him. “Thank goodness you two are safe.”

“You too Dai” Jin wheezed as he caught up, trying to recover his breath.

“Daddy, you’re hurt.” Kaneko cried as she withdrew from him and noticed the blood stains on his shirt that he hadn’t thought to conceal. “What happened?”

“Its fine Kaneko, I’m alright really.” She knew he was lying, but still he tried to reassure her. After all, he was a lot of better than some others were. “Don’t worry, I’m alright.”

“No, you’re hurt Daddy. Don’t lie to me!” Kaneko protested as he refused to answer. “You fought against the horsemen didn’t you? What happened?” She could feel tears running down her cheeks as Daiki’s composure began to fail. Something was badly wrong. “Dad, did something happen to mommy?”

“No, it’s not... I haven’t seen your mother yet” he answered. “Me and the others... Garvan and Nat... We fought two of the horsemen. We... got separated afterwards. I don’t know what happened to them...”

There was a tense silence between them. Trying to find a distraction and give Daiki an out to spare him from telling Kaneko the whole truth, Jin turned to the doorway. “Think we need to get past this?”

“Yeah.” Thankful for the diversion, Daiki managed to quell his feelings and explain. “The door seems linked to a duel puzzle, you need to solve it to open it. But I... er... haven’t been able to yet.” That was a plausible story, albeit a downright lie. However Kaneko, easily distracted, positively bounced over to the panel to try it.

“Don’t worry; this will be easy for me. Let’s see” she muttered, browsing over the screen with the curious Jin. “Hmm, opponent has three thousand life points, controls a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Marshmallon"]Marshmallon[/url] and a face down, plus [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Shiny_Black%22C%22"]Black Shining G[/url] in the cemetery. We have to win this turn, with... a Laval deck?

Kaneko and Jin looked at each other, neither could bring themselves to turn and face Daiki behind them.

...07:32:16...

The streets were quiet, save for the swirling vortex far, far overhead that was absorbing the world. That was many miles away from the streets of Tokyo; it was like a regular, constant background noise that was hushed by the stillness around the derelict streets. Outside the western front entrance of the royal hotel, Hideo and Junichi stood in silence, along with a few other ragtag members that comprised their defensive forces. Two of Baron’s agents had joined them; neither had much experience duelling but had been volunteered by the director to support the unit. Four more civilians joined them. One was a very elderly man, who had escaped with his grandkids and learned in Duel Monsters through them, waited in silence. A young woman stood at the front with Junichi, a more able recruit apparently on the tournament circuit and a real find for them, staring into the distant streets with a steely focus.

The other two were a couple. Hideo had discovered, to his revulsion, they had married only yesterday and been staying in the hotel overnight before their honeymoon. The husband had been in reception when Baron called over the announcer for any experienced duelists to come to them, and asked what was going on. Upon his accurate guess, he volunteered adamantly to help, and his bride offered too, refusing to be separated from him. Hideo had told Baron to refuse them, but there were so few who answered the call, and he suspected Baron wanted them out here out of the way now they knew what was going on. Most of those who had bought D-Disks were young kids, but he successfully insisted at least that they were not involved in fighting. Instead he and the others had borrowed them, and the kids moved to safety. The device felt weighty and awkward on his arm, having never worn one before, and as he looked at the small pile of cards, he still couldn’t get his head around what was about to happen. The monsters they showed were as alive as he was. Or at least for the moment they were, before they stood against each other as savages, seeking to kill. Looking at the couple, he felt sick. Marriage seemed an alien concept now, and the very next day they were going to war. They shouldn’t have to be doing this.

Everyone else had been moved downstairs, although no explanation was offered to them. It annoyed him that Baron hadn’t told them what was going on. Knowing something was wrong but not what it was would more likely cause panic than anything. Mai was with them, and in the brief moment before he had to go he had approached her and told her what was happening. He couldn’t not do so. She was shocked, but accepted he had made his choice, as Sakura had. He wished he could have said more. There was more he wanted to say, and now he might not have another chance. It all depended on the small pack of cards as to what his fate and those of the other seven around him would be.

Meanwhile Junichi stood at the front of the group in silence. Despite his exterior he was as nervous as the others. The breeze was soft; he tried matching his breathing to it. All of this; all caused by a few people whose goals were a mystery to him, had devastated so many lives. And all of it stemmed from the corporation he had been, like so many others, a fanatical customer of. Had been a champion of. Well, some champion. He knew he was no champion, and presumably Hideo knew as well. But he was still being looked up to now for his supposed skill; as the leader of the group, the bedrock of it. Maybe this was a cruel joke of fate. Or maybe now was a chance to prove himself, as a duelist and as a man. Not Real Duel’s. Not that mystery woman he’d never found out the identity of. Not his father’s. His own.

The breathing technique seemed to work, as when the ground started to shake, and the quiet stillness was broken by a rumbling of land and a drone of air, he just accepted it without any reaction of fear. Just acceptance of the stampede and flock of demons that was right around the corner. He looked at Hideo as the prime minister armed his D-Disk rather awkwardly. The two exchanged a steely nod.

“Alright here it comes. Good luck everyone.”

The group took arms as just a few dozen metres down to the corner of the street; the buildings began to collapse, as the Demon Roar God army crashed through. Leading the charge were several of the bull fiends [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Dianaira"]Dianaira[/url], snarling as their great purple bodies smashed through like battering rams rather than take the corner and thundered across the distance towards the group. Over their heads swooped a fleet of masked winged warriors, the [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Raven"]Ravens[/url], firing upon the hotel as soon as they came within range.

As the attacks rained down, Hideo froze. So did some of the others. One of the agents was blasted by a ball of dark energy before he even moved, obliterated from existence as soon as it touched him. The others managed to scatter out of the way as more rained down on them, missing the rest. In a blur of movement, Junichi grabbed at his deck. “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Poseidra%2C_the_Atlantean_Dragon"]Sea Emperor Dragon Poseidra[/url], attack those aerial demons!”

With a gurgling snarl the great ocean lord burst over their heads, releasing a crushing stream of water towards the winged creatures. Caught by surprise they failed to react, and were easily eradicated. As the dragon swooped back round to face the stunned pack of Dianaira, Hideo gasped as he recognised it. “That’s the... that’s...”

Something roared behind him. Hideo spun, and found himself face to face with another Dianaira, having broken from the pack in the chaos and wielding a huge piece of wall over its head, about to smash it over him. There was no time for him to do anything. He didn’t react, not even as the great bull suddenly jerked, roaring in pain, before it vanished, revealing a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Shadow_of_the_Six_Samurai_-_Shien"]dark swordsman[/url] in red and violet armour holding a masamune that had plunged into the demon’s back, and the old gentleman standing behind it. The gentleman nodded, before the samurai leapt away to take on more of the advancing bulls.

“Don’t just stand there, fight!” Junichi shouted, as he summoned three different Mermails at once. Across the street the woman had picked up two of her cards and summoned them both simultaneously, coming forth in the form of a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Lightray_Gearfried"]warrior[/url] in bright white armour and holding a sword and shield, and a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Lightray_Diabolos"]dragon[/url] with a similar coloured hide. The two Lightray monsters instinctively got stuck into the Dianaira with the samurai and Poseidra. “Summoning conditions and attack points don’t matter here; this is just all out war. Just summon and attack with something. Anything and everything!”

“Right!” Hideo shouted, closing his eyes and blindly snatching at the small deck. There he found three cards, depicting the images of strange and mythical looking beasts of yore. None of them looked that powerful compared to what the others were bringing out all around him. He considered redrawing, but more shouts and gunfire blasts alerted him that more demons were arriving. They were coming from both ends of the streets and over the buildings, demons of all shapes and sizes, the only similarity being the wicked grin many shared. Some of their ranks took on the form of beasts much like his own, such as the [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/The_Fabled_Unicore"]unicorn[/url] like creature charging ahead of the group and swinging its horn at him. He’d take that one. “Er... summon. [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Heraldic_Beast_Aberconway"]Heraldic Beast Aberconway[/url]! [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Heraldic_Beast_Basilisk"]Heraldic Beast Basilisk[/url]! [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Heraldic_Beast_Eale"]Heraldic Beast Yale[/url]! Help us!”

Three portals opened before him, and to his amazement his call was answered as a small horned dragon, a most bizarre chicken like creature with lizard wings and tail, and a horned goat, charged out before him. The unicorn was completely unfazed, spearing the Aberconway before it could even react.

“Use Basilisk!” someone shouted in the mayhem.

Hideo had no idea what that meant, but did as he was told. Before the unicorn could skewer the second creature, the lizard bird had engulfed itself in flame and charged, bathing the fantasy beast in the blaze as well. Both creatures exploded simultaneously. Amazed with his miraculous success, Hideo looked for the third creature to give it a command, only to find his success short-lived as the goat was being mauled by the demon queen [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Leviathan"]Leviathan[/url] he recognised from earlier. Seeing her, he felt sick again.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaah!”

Someone flew past him, and everything in the world went into slow motion. It was the bride of the couple! Her body crackled with dark energy as she flew in front of him, landing on her back. A second thing came flying right after her, a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Gallabas"]lizard man[/url] armed with a huge mace held high over its head, having dispatched of the pair of small [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Mahunder"]electric[/url] [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Sishunder"]girls[/url] she was using. Now it was going for her. Powerless to react, Hideo watched the woman scream as the demon landed and stood over her, lifting the mace, the heavy spiked club to fall crashing down... and silence to fall with it. Her crushed lifeless body lay there for a few seconds, before her remains turned to light, and slowly rose towards the swirl above!

“Sakura? NOOO!” Hideo’s senses returned as the husband, stricken with panic and grief, rushed up beside him, staring at the lizard demon as it stood up from its striking position. “My beloved! You... I can’t... no... No!” Maddened by grief, the man lashed out. “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Noble_Knight_Artorigus"]Noble Knight Artorigus[/url], kill that monster!”

A human warrior in silver armour roared past Hideo, towards the lizard creature. However a few more of its kind were joining ranks beside it. He would need help. “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Heraldic_Beast_Unicorn"]Heraldic Beast Unicorn[/url], assist Artorigus!”

His own unicorn creature, plated in armour, joined the knight and charged the demons, tackling two of them at once as the knight slew the third and forth. More came, more and more in their droves along with their allies, but all who came were slain. Artorigus eventually fell, but the man refused to give up, summoning his second [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Noble_Knight_Gawayn"]Noble Knight[/url] in berserk rage. Hideo had another Heraldic, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Heraldic_Beast_Berners_Falcon"]Bernard's Falcon[/url] join the fray. Eventually the demonic forces were halted, and the man was able to collapse into tears.

“Sakura. I’m sorry; I should never have let you come here with me. I should have protected you better.”

Hideo stood by as he grieved, oblivious to the chaos around them. He felt so many things it was hard to pin any one down. This poor man, he didn’t know what to say to him. That his wife wanted to be with him, to protect him like he did her? To not let madness consume him? He tried to decide, but a familiar cackling sound followed by crackling static made him aware of something more pressing. “Look out!”

Hideo grabbed and pulled the man out of the way just before the energy ball hit the earth they had occupied. Only the familiar forewarning of the attack of the Leviathan overhead had saved them, as it leered down, frustrated at having only left a smoking crater this time. The man hadn’t really realised they were under attack, still weeping as he looked up at the demon without registering. He had to say something. “Fight man, you have to! Fight for your Sakura’s memory and live as she would will you!”

He didn’t respond, other than an increase in tears. He was on his own at the moment, and although Unicorn and Falcon still stood, he suspected they might be a bit outmatched on this one. The duelist woman and her remaining swordsman were tangling with a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Valkyrus"]Valkyrus[/url], Junichi was commanding a small platoon of fishman warriors against various demons, the old gentleman was somewhere in the chaos and the samurai was fighting on a rooftop against another flying [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Fabled_Ragin"]demon[/url] he recognised, and the other agent he hadn’t seen anything of since the fight began, he could well have already been killed in the confusion as well.

“This is... hell on earth” Hideo muttered. “Unicorn. Falcon. Attack that foul creature and send it back into the abyss!”

The two beasts lunged for it, but to his horror Leviathan just swatted them away with ease. Distraction dealt with the demon queen returned to dispense with them, but as she did her delighted expression turned to shock, before it was blasted away by a torrent of water. She slammed into the floor and was eradicated, heralding a victorious gurgling roar of the sea dragon Poseidra circling overhead.

Hideo knew he was close. Heaving the despairing husband to his feet, he looked to Junichi standing behind him. His expression was masked. “Again? But why?”

“Because I’m not my dad” Junichi simply replied, before returning to the battle.

...07:36:22...

The search was getting frustrating now. Murtagh found himself standing alone before another heavy rune covered door, a defence to the inner sanctum through which he had to pass, to which a panel was connected displaying a duel puzzle. [i]‘What’s with this stupid place? Why even give me a chance to get in here by using these duel simulators as a defence? Doesn’t he know who I am?’[/i] He took a brief look at it, the puzzle depicted an opponent with ten thousand life points and controlling a [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Doomcaliber_Knight"]Deathcaliber Knight[/url], [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Thuner_King_Rai-Oh"]Thunder King[/url], and other cards, and shrugged.

“Thunder End Dragon...”

Overhead the mighty blue dragon roared and blasted the heavy doors with its high voltage breath, the sparks engulfing and crackling against the blockade for a good twenty seconds and leaving them smoking slightly. Murtagh simply kicked the weakened door and it swung open for him. [i]‘Some defence.’[/i]

Marching through, Murtagh found himself in an open gothic chamber, largely empty, and flanked by three more heavy doors. Chandeliers emitted a dim candle light overhead, casting four long shadows over the floor. Puzzled, Murtagh faced the left wall. Flanking that door were four stone statues; marble, bloodstone, black onyx and a clear diamond stone, each representing a horseman and their nightmarish steed. Even he found these statues vaguely interesting, especially the fact that three of them depicted their horseman keeled over and slumped against their horses, their weapons hanging limply by their sides, while only the fourth and final rider sat up tall with his blade held high. Well surely they weren’t originally crafted that way. Shrugging, he went for that door, which opened without much trouble.

On the other side of this door was a dark and empty throne room. He couldn’t pick out the walls or ceiling from the little light, omitted only by the holographic screens in front of him reflecting the swirl outside and what was happening out there, ripping his world apart. And sat amongst them as regally and casually as you like without even a flicker of a reaction to his entrance, was the pale armoured knight responsible for it.

Death did not stir even as he marched towards him, simply sat resting his helmet on his interlocked gauntlets looking at him. “So you’re the wacko who wants to meddle in my business then? Nice digs, but you’re not very hospitable with your guests. You need to learn some manners.”

Death still did not stir.

This made Murtagh twitch; he made very little effort to control his temper as he stormed across the throne room. “Hey, I’m talking to you mister big bad horseman. That’s what your fancy Halloween costume is supposed to be right? Come on, you were more than happy to run your mouth when you were destroying my inventions, stealing my Number cards and dropping me through the floor of your haunted house with the dark biblical prophecies of doom and destruction, but now we’re face to face you go all quiet on me. Starting to regret meddling with me now huh?”

Still no response.

“Grr... come on tin man. You lost your voice out of fear of what I’m going to do to you, having seen what I did to that government meddler and my disgusting ex? Or have you just died while hiding in here?” Still no bloody reaction! Infuriating! Maybe he was shouting at an empty suit of armour, a trap? Murtagh lost his temper. Fire burst into life in the palm of his own clawed gauntlet, and he hurled it at the still knight. Still he didn’t move as the fireball screamed towards him. The fireball smashed into his shoulder, with enough force to shatter any normal human’s entire arm, and petered out against the strange plate. And still he didn’t move in the slightest, just continued to stare straight at him through that faceless helmet. Now Murtagh was starting to feel uncomfortable; something in there had just sat and taken his assault, and he could feel hidden eyes drilling into him, making his neck hairs prickle. “Come on, say something!”

Having been waiting and wanting a reaction for so long and getting nothing, Murtagh flinched as Death suddenly just sighed, and slowly stood from the throne. [i]“Is that all you have to say to me Murtagh? No questions, no seeking of an explanation or truth. Just a few generic insults and empty threats.”[/i]

“What? Bah, I’m not interested in your truth. It’s not exactly difficult to work you out given what you think you are and represent. I didn’t come here to listen to your explanation; I didn’t come here to find out who you are or why you’re doing this. I just came here to kick you into your own abyss and seal it off from my world. Then I can get back to my kingdom that you’re making a mess of. Got that?”

Death was silent for a moment, as if he hadn’t got that. Finally he stirred again with a resigned sigh, reaching to the twin sheaths hanging from either hip. [i]“Then we agree on one thing; that we have nothing to discuss.”[/i]

“Finally you get it” Murtagh rolled his eyes sarcastically, arming his D-Wing gauntlet. This was it. All he had to do was crush this guy, and with his threat out of the way and world restored he could dispense with those other meddlers. Then no-one would ever be able to stop him. No-one could hope to ever raise a hand against him again. Something rumbled in the distance, but it wouldn’t distract him for his enemy. This would finish things once and for all.

Death shook his head as he slid his two weapons out of their holsters. His staff in his right hand, and a curved, glinting scythe in the left. [i]“Humph, impudent boy. You have never changed. So full of anger and vengeance, lusting for power and superiority to justify your own existence. Taking pleasure out of the suffering of others, arrogant and reckless, never changing in your ways[/i].” The rumbling was getting louder and fiercer now, but the pale horseman was unaffected by it.[i] “I accept your foolish challenge, thus releasing you from your miserable existence.”[/i]

To Murtagh’s amazement, the two weapons transformed and locked under each gauntlet like hooked blades, each taking the form of half a duel disk. The scythe became a longer and more pronounced blade, with five slots for cards running along its edge. The staff became thinner and flat, with a row of five more card slots, whilst the jewelled tip grew into a gem of a main console against the back of his right hand, holding his deck. The throne room continued to shake violently, to the point where Murtagh had to look for the cause, realising as a sliver of light opened in the middle of the room and began to widen that it was from above. The ceiling was opening up, revealing the gigantic swirl overhead. As it opened and the room lit up, the gravity of the swirl or something else began to lift him upwards. Death too was rising, both of them floating upwards as the throne room ceiling withdrew entirely. He seemed unfussy about this, simply folding his thick arms, and the two blades seamlessly sliding into place against one another to form one big D-Disk. This all seemed a bit of a palaver to Murtagh, how the hell was he supposed to duel with his arms crossed the whole time? He kept his frustration silent though, he had to ignore the tricks and diversions and beat this illusionist. That’s all he was. The two continued to rise until they were out of the throne room, level with the flat roof of the castle’s upper tier and separated by a good distance of empty space, good for a titanic battle between entities. Nothing about the air changed to represent an ARV barrier forming around them, but presumably this smug bastard’s realm would provide, what would serve as a means to his own destruction. As Murtagh took his opening hand a status display indeed appeared in the space behind him. Death just stood floating there, looking at him with no expression. Was he afraid? Was he laughing? “Alright Death, one last game. Let’s end this!”

“Duel!”

...

[i]“Your opponent’s life points have reached 0. Identity confirmed successfully. Door C7 deactivated.”[/i]

Kaneko punched the air in success. With the more traditional means of solving the combination, the third giant door before them unlocked itself, allowing Dai and Jin to push through. On the other side was a great open entrance chamber, with four strange stone statues to their right, whilst coming out of a door on their left that was also opening...

“Clarissa?”

“Mommy!”

“Oh my darling, you’re okay.” Clarissa scooped up the little girl as she ran towards her, embracing her in a tight hug. To Daiki and Jin’s relief Sakura emerged from the doorway as well, she acknowledged them with a mute nod, before looking down away from them all with a most glum expression. She’d clearly been crying, and they noticed some of her exposed skin looked oddly cracked and discoloured. Letting Kaneko bury herself cosily into her shoulder, Clarissa turned to Dai. He looked just as grim, and to her shock was covered in blood. “You have battled against the horseman as well. What happened?”

“Yeah. Me, Garvan... and Nat... we took out two of them” he replied hollowly.

“Garvan and Natsumi, they...” She broke off as Dai looked away. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s... I’ll.... What happened to you guys? You fight the third one?” he asked, wanting to change the subject. Clarissa nodded.

“Sakura and I were confronted by the white horseman. He was...” Clarissa broke off again, seemingly unsure what to say around Sakura. The girl didn’t look up, but nodded to say she was okay. “He was Sakura’s boyfriend.”

“Oh.” There was no need for further explanation. The mood among the five becoming heavier by the second, all turned to the misshapen statues across the hall, noting the three fallen figures and one proud rider remaining, and the door between them that was slightly ajar. “Guess that leaves just the one to take out.”

“The forth horseman... Do you think anyone else is in there with him?” Jin asked.

“Must be, can’t see him just suddenly leaving doors open for us” Clarissa replied. “Well, only one way to find out. We’re all going in there together, alright.”

All silently agreed, and marched as one across the hall, through the doors and into the throne room. Inside appeared completely empty at first, until to their surprise they spotted the roof had opened to expose the swirl, and two figures were just standing in the air above them. “Hey, it’s Murtagh” Jin pointed towards the dragonic figure of the former avatar stood with his back to them. However most of the attention was drawn by the tall, powerful figure of the pale knight standing most relaxed across their midair playing field with his arms folded into his weird double edged D-Disk.

“That must be him, the final horseman. Death.”

“I wonder what sort of deck he uses. And what his Number is?”

“Never mind his deck. How does he even intend to hold his cards like that?”

High above them, Clarissa’s comments seemed to amuse Death. [i]“It seems we have gathered an audience. Your allies come to witness your demise.”[/i] Murtagh gave the assembled group a quick glance.

“Nope, don’t see any allies of mine down there.”

[i]“You still chose to be a lone dragon then Murtagh. Well then you expose yourself to dying alone. By my hand, as I will begin this duel now. Draw.”[/i] The clear diamond duel hub glistened, but he didn’t move to take any cards offered. Murtagh blinked, and several people below gasped, as cards simply materialised in Death’s free left hand, followed by another glisten of the hub and a sixth card appeared next to them, seemingly just transferring from one space to another. The horseman gave his hand a look, it was difficult to tell given the helmet but he must have at least looked at his cards, before simply announcing his move. [i]“Permanent magic placed, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Valhalla%2C_Hall_of_the_Fallen"]Hall of the Gods, Valhalla[/url].”[/i]

One of the cards in his hand dematerialised, then re-materialised on the upper blade as an enlarged holographic image displayed the selected card. Two great stone pillars blasted upwards from the castle behind him, forming an arch for the gods to descend from. [i]“With this permanent magic in place, I can use it when I control no monsters to summon a high level angel type monster” [/i]Death explained before much to Murtagh’s surprise revealing an appropriate monster.[i] “Descend, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Athena"]Athena[/url]!”[/i]

Murtagh grimaced as a heroic goddess appeared through the arch, carrying a grand spear and shield (Lv7, ATK 2600). He couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing. “You are joking me right? Death, the big scary bringer of Armageddon, uses a fairy deck. Really?”

[i]“There are many types of angel, not all are divine” [/i]Death proclaimed darkly.[i] “Some protect, some nurture, some watch in silence, and some are bringers of ruin and destruction. There is no difference, only the perspective in which they are seen. Athena’s effect activates. Every time an angel type monster is summoned, you take six hundred points of damage!”[/i] With a harsh battle cry Athena released a heavenly blast from the tip of her spear, hitting Murtagh in the ribs. He cringed and lost a step, but did not allow any further weakness to be displayed (LP 3400). [i]“Next I activate [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Celestial_Transformation"]Deification of Light[/url]. By halving the attack points of an angel type monster in my hand, I can special summon it, although it will be destroyed during the end phase. Descend on black wings, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Darklord_Asmodeus"]Fallen Angel Asmoseus[/url]!”[/i]

Indeed, in a column of light a tall, dark winged creature in white robes and even paler skin stood beside the warrior goddess (Lv8, ATK 1500). [i]“Now you take another six hundred points of damage!”[/i]

Murtagh snarled as the second blast hit him in the shoulder, and lost a few more steps. To the group’s shock his body trembled as he clutched the wounded shoulder. He was actually wounded! Even he was hurt by Death’s comparatively minor attacks, try as he might to hide it (LP 2800). “Bah, that all you got?”

[i]“Asmoseus’ effect activates” [/i]Death continued impassively.[i] “Once per turn, I can send one angel type from my deck to the cemetery. Then I activate magic [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Trade-In"]Trade In[/url]; discarding the level eight [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Darklord%20Superbia"]Fallen Angel Superbia[/url] in exchange for two new cards.” [/i]The exchanges took place still without any movement from the statuesque knight. It was creepy to watch as he glanced at his two extras, goodness knew what he thought of them. [i]“Now I activate the other effect of Athena. By releasing Asmoseus, Superbia is revived in its stead. In doing so Superbia’s effect activates; summoning the milled [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Darklord_Zerato"]Fallen Angel Zerato[/url] with it.”[/i]

Asmoseus sank into a hellish portal, and in its place rose a black egg shaped creature with eagle like wings and talons (Lv8, ATK 2900). This was closely followed by a winged swordsman (Lv8, ATK 2800). [i]“Two more angel type monsters have been summoned!” Death declared, adjusting himself slightly to clench a fist. “Now Athena slams you for another twelve hundred points of damage!”[/i]

Two more blasts from the angel’s staff, exploding into Murtagh’s leg and chest one after another. The dragon god coughed and spluttered, and to his and the others horror found himself choking on blood in the process, thick red droplets falling down in front of the party like rain. The false god bleeds (LP 1600).

“Twenty four hundred points of damage on the first turn, and three monsters all with attack even higher than that” Jin blurted far below in the dark throne room. “This is really bad.”

“Believe me, it’s about to get worse.” Jin swallowed as he looked at Daiki. His expression was grim as he studied the array of monsters surrounding the pale horseman. Sat in Clarissa’s arms next to him, Kaneko was watching just as intently, frowning and deep in thought.

[i]“Magic card, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Galaxy_Queen%27s_Light"]Galaxy Queen's Light[/url].”[/i] Another holographic reflected the card moving itself from hand to disk. [i]“This targets my level eight Superbia, and brings all other monsters levels up to match. So now I will overlay my three level eight monsters and Xyz summon!” [/i]The angel’s dissolved bodies crashed into the swirling galaxy opening behind them one after another, confirming their fears. [i]“Behold the power you so desperately crave to wield, before it crushes you completely. [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Number_88:_Gimmick_Puppet_-_Destiny_Leo"]Number 88: Gimmick Puppet Destiny Leo[/url]!”[/i]

For those seeing it for the first time, it was bad. For Dai and Kaneko, it was worse. The whole castle shook as the giant throne crashed onto the battlements behind him, seated upon it the great white lion, clutching its golden sword (Rk8, ATK 3200). “Destiny Leo’s effect activates. By detaching an overlay unit, it gains one destiny counter. When this effect has been activated three times, this duel and your life end.” The lion shifted slightly, as its devastating effect began its countdown. [i]“I set one card. Turn end.”[/i]

“About damn time!” Murtagh snapped as he drew his card in reply.

“Kaneko, explanation” Sakura asked. She had seen some things during her adventures of the last twenty or so hours, and just occasionally she’d even understood some of what was going on. However this Number left her baffled, although it was giving her a feeling of dread creeping through her.

“Leo is an alternative win condition” the girl obliged. “Instead of defeating Murtagh by reducing his life points, he wants to use Leo’s effect to place three destiny counters on it. If he is successful, Leo will annihilate Murtagh regardless of everything else in play.” The explanation and her tone made Sakura feel worse. “It’s a symbol of individuality and curiosity, as well as devastating power. However Leo comes with costs. It can’t attack if it uses its effect, and it’s really hard to protect as well, apart from its big attack points. Plus Death used his whole hand to summon it. I wonder how Murtagh will respond.”

As if he’d heard her, Murtagh responded, and with great fury. “Magic card, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Future_Fusion"]Future Fusion[/url]! By sending monsters listed on a fusion monster from my deck to the cemetery, I can special summon that monster during my second standby phase after activation.” Five monsters flew into Murtagh’s graveyard slot, but quickly left it again as the ghosts of [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Darkblaze_Dragon"]Darkblaze Dragon[/url], [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Red-Eyes_B._Dragon"]Red Eyes Black Dragon[/url], [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Divine_Dragon_Apocralyph"]God Dragon Apocalypse[/url], [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Bright_Star_Dragon"]Starbright Dragon[/url] and [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Alexandrite_Dragon"]Alexandrite Dragon[/url] vanished into a rather different portal. “But why wait that long when I can then activate [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Dragon%27s_Mirror"]Dragon Mirror[/url]; banishing all those dragons from play to fusion summon right now! Come, great beast of the elements and servant of the gods, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Five_Headed_Dragon"]Five God Dragon[/url]!”

The monstrous amalgamated dragon hit the field with an earth shattering crash, sending chunks of rock flying everywhere as the five heads screeched in horrific unison (Lv12, ATK 5000). Death remained unmoved as Murtagh reached out to his dragon. “Now attack Destiny Leo! Wrath of the Gods!”

Five streams of fire, water, wind, rubble and dark energy slammed into the lion king’s body. The king remained unruffled and unaffected, given its invulnerability as a Number of course, and so amazingly did Death. He had taken the damage, but had not responded in any physical way except for a billowing of cloak (LP 2200). [i]“Despite everything, is that really all you’ve got?”[/i]

“No it’s not actually” Murtagh snapped, ignoring the slight change in Death’s tone. “I set two cards and that’ll do for now.” Two images of hidden cards appeared side by side as he ended his turn.

“Murtagh, you don’t have time to mess around doing that” Daiki muttered. “He’s not going to do anything stupid that might trigger a trap. You’ve got to get rid of it quickly.”

“Maybe he has more time than you think.” Kaneko was watching Death carefully, as another card simply materialised in his hand. “Destiny Leo can’t use its effect when you have spell or trap cards on the field, like Death has. That’s why it’s... wait, you’ve faced it?” she blurted, suddenly realising. “But how?”

“During our duel, we defeated the Numbers War and Famine used” Daiki croaked. Flashes of the event flew past him. “Famine survived and regained his conscious a little bit, but Death seemed to forcibly take control of him, and made him summon that Number. That’s when Nat...” He tailed off, looking up at the duel. Looking at Death, a pang of revulsion crept over him. [i]‘Never thought I’d ever think this, but come on Murtagh. You and your dragons rip this guy and that accursed thing apart. It won’t make up for me failing Natsumi, but at least she’ll be avenged somewhat and this madman made to pay.’[/i]

[i]“I must say Murtagh, that I am deeply disappointed with your opening move” [/i]Death said stiffly. [i]“After all your bravado, after all your claims to be the most superior being of all humanity, you offend me with a single attack that you surely knew could not take down Destiny Leo. Is this really all the power an avatar of the Real Duel system possesses nowadays?”[/i]

“What?” Murtagh blinked. The comment had blind sighted him completely. The hell did this guy know about Real Duel? True he wouldn’t say he’d drawn unbelievably brilliantly but well enough, but the guy’s words suddenly unnerved him. “Whatever, I’m much more than that now. I’m the ruler of both virtual and human worlds combined into my paradise. Well until you decided to stick your shiny head in it and try to bring it all crashing down. If you didn’t want to exist under my dominance so badly you could have just jumped you know, rather than go all sour grapes and try to drag me down with your miserable butt. But don’t worry, you’ll get to see my real power soon enough.”

[i]“You honestly believe this was some knee jerk reaction to your ‘paradises’ creation?” [/i]Death asked. His tone was not angry, he seemed genuinely surprised. [i]“Foolish puppet, you have no idea of anything. How long the wheels of fate have been rolling towards this moment, and how I have you to thank for your assistance in it reaching the brink of the abyss above us.”[/i]

“Enough with the puppet remark already!” Murtagh swore in frustration. “That’s like the third time! I’m nobodies freaking puppet! I don’t care if you don’t like it, I don’t care if they don’t like it. I am better and will rule all. It’s not what I was destined for by some fate, but a destiny I’ve made from my own hands and work, and I’m not letting some crackpot whose too into the western bible take it away like this!”

Death let him have him have his rant without interruption. His words when he did speak were weighty and dark. [i]“You are a puppet, and always have been. Just like Destiny Leo, pulled by the strings of fate with no control over your existence however much you try and deny it. Still you seek no answers or ask questions. You close your mind to everything and ram your self-importance down other people’s throats despite your relevant insignificance. Well, perhaps that is unkind. But still, you don’t want to know?”[/i]

“Know what?”

[i]“Who I am?” [/i]Death said simply.[i] “What all this is? Why you are a puppet?”[/i]

“No, I’m still not interested. You’re only going to give me deranged pack of lies anyway.”

[i]“Just as I said, your mind is closed to everything.”[/i] Death shrugged, as the card in his hand began to dematerialise. [i]“Exactly like the boy that entered the VDS eight years ago with his all new powers for the first time. I remember looking at you then, a boy with a warped mind and a heart of greed, a vessel of disaster for all just like the dragons he so loved to torment other duelists with.” [/i]

Murtagh gasped, he was describing him from eight years ago! Who was this guy? It was too late to ask now, as Death chuckled at his reaction. [i]“However that boy’s usefulness is about to expire, as is his life.”[/i]

...07:47:22...

[i]‘Right, now what?’[/i]

Hideo swallowed as he, Junichi and the other remaining defenders of the royal hotel turned refugee camp backed away from the advancing Demon Roar God forces. The newlywed husband had fallen, having recklessly attacked by himself as the Gallabas regrouped and met a similar fate to his wife. They had also suffered a massive blow in losing the pro Lightray user, who while fighting off several demons was stabbed in the back by a sneak attack. However the old gentleman was still with them, as was the other agent Baron had assigned to their team having survived up to now by some miracle.

“There’s so many left, and more just keep coming” the old man grumbled as the remaining demons and their beastly allies regrouped. “Any ideas gentleman?”

“I’ll be honest, I’m struggling” Junichi replied as he drew from his deck. All of their monsters had been defeated, but that with five hundred or so people in the building behind him he wasn’t going to give up that easily. “Beautiful draw. Come, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Moulinglacia_the_Elemental_Lord"]Ice Spirit God - Moulin Grace[/url]!”

A snowy giant emerged from a blizzard above him. The old gentleman and agent went for their decks, both drawing copies of [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Monster_Reborn"]Raise Dead[/url]. “Shadow of Six Samurai - Shien!” “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Koalo-Koala"]Koalo-Koala[/url]!”

The crimson cloaked samurai and a bulky beast creature rose up before each of them. Inspired, Hideo went for his deck. The earth was shaking; the buildings around them trembled as their forces regrouped. He felt adrenaline rushing through him, pounding with every frantic heartbeat. “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Advanced_Heraldry_Art"]High Medallion Arts[/url]! Revive two Heraldic Beasts and immediately overlay them. Er, Xyz summon!” Yale and Basilisk returned, but to his surprise instead of turning into a powerful beast, they collapsed into each other in an ungainly heap. It took a moment to realise the problem. “Oh for god’s sake, I don’t have any Xyz monsters! Bah, never mind! We still have these powerful monsters to defend this place against these fiends. Come on!”

To his surprise though, the demon forces seemed a bit less keen now. The remaining demons were exchanging what might be described as fearful expressions, before to the surprise of all they began to turn around and leave, either lumbering down the streets or flying far off into the distance.

“What? Did they just give up?” the agent asked, bewildered.

Hideo shook his head. Something was wrong. The ground was still shaking, more violently than before, and heavy thuds could be heard, each getting louder and louder, like mini-earthquakes. Something big was coming straight for them. To his disbelief the two towers across the street and gardens in front of them completely collapsed, as the creator of the earthquakes crashed through. Gigantic did not begin to describe this thing. A mighty golden dragon was pulling its heavy body across the earth, debris falling off its iron like hide and plated wings as it crashed through like it was nothing. The [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Malefic_Truth_Dragon"]dragon[/url] looked down at them disdainfully, and unleashed an ear splitting screech. In one wave of noise, a pulse was released with it, smashing into the upper hotel floors, and to their horror all five monsters were obliterated instantly.

Reeling from the dreadful noise, Hideo swallowed as the dragon loomed over them. This creature was not going to be stoppable. He knew that, all the others must know that. This made one of their ranks stepping forward all the more awful to watch.

“Get inside, all of you” Junichi whispered. “Quickly.”

“No way” Hideo protested. “There’s been too much sacrifice over this day, you can’t do this.”

“I must. That thing will rip the hotel apart in seconds if we all run inside, and will get at everyone else. I have to stay and try and fend it off, lead it away. Besides, even if Baron’s men save the situation and restore the world to normal, there will be no place for me.” Hideo continued to protest, begged him to come back inside with the others, but the young man refused to budge, just staring emptily up at the dragon. “People will want to know what happened, and I would rather go out with a little bit of honour to my name after the actions of my father beseeched it, not to mention the corruption surrounding me that you recently became aware of.”

“That... oh that. No, that doesn’t matter now...”

“Not now, but if normality was restored then it would. I could not stand to become prime minister after my part in my father’s actions, so driven to achieve power through me. I let him use me, just as I let Real Duel use me as their poster champion when they rigged my win. I know it seems mad as a big cover-up now, but if people discovered that was all a lie, would they ever vote for me? Thus father would never get his power, thus his determination to kill you.” The grandfather and the agent stared at him open mouthed at his confession, but still Hideo pleaded and pulled at his arm.

“Please Junichi, you can’t do this. At least not alone. Let me fight too. Maybe together we can beat it.”

Junichi smiled, and shook his head. “That’s very kind of you sir, but no, I accept there is no chance, but you can escape. You have Mai, she will need you. And I understand Sakura is out there fighting too, she needs you to be here to come back to. I have no-one, except those people. This is...” His voice wavered slightly, infuriating himself. “This is my duty, and my choice. It’s been an honour to fight with you sir.”

His mind was made up. The old gentleman and agent gave him their blessing and retreated inside. But Hideo’s legs wouldn’t move. He couldn’t leave him. He couldn’t lose another man like this. Junichi just shook his head and marched out into the open, walking straight towards the giant creature with not an ounce of fear as it looked down on them. “Junichi, I will have you remembered with honour. I swear it.”

Junichi smiled despite himself as Hideo took one last look, before running inside. Well that was nice, but he doubted it was possible. It would need a miracle for there to be anyone left to remember him either way. Still, miracles did happen. Above him the golden dragon was advancing again. He didn’t need much of one now, just to be quick. “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Gagagigo_the_Risen"]Awakened Hero Gagagigo[/url]! Seal the entrance to the hotel!”

The mighty lizardman rose, just in time, and slammed its tail into the hotel with such force that almost half of the front collapsed, burying the entrance and sealing everyone safely underground, far from the dragon’s reach. Hopefully. Defence done, Junichi and Gagagigo faced the dragon together, as it prepared its attack...

...

Death: LP 4000, Hand 1, Field of Destiny Leo (Counters: 1) and a face down
Murtagh: LP 1600, Hand 2, Field of Five God Dragon and two face downs

[i]“As the prodigal child correctly stated, Destiny Leo’s effect cannot be activated whilst there exists cards in my magic and trap zones” [/i]Death stated simply.[i] “This is an annoyance, but only a minor one. Magic card; [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Blasting_Vein"]Blast Vein[/url]. By destroying my set card, I can draw twice more.”[/i]

Murtagh grimaced as the trap exploded without revealing, and two more cards appeared in the knight’s hand. [i]‘Another draw card? What is he looking for? Something to protect Destiny Leo with, or something else?’[/i] The knight gave the cards a mild glance before impassively indicating to the giant lion king. [i]“Now with that taken care of, I can activate Leo’s effect again, gaining its second destiny counter.” [/i]

The king shifted more noticeably, taking a firm grip of its sword and halfway unsheathing it. [i]“I place another card face down and end my turn. The countdown to your defeat is inevitable if you continue to duel this badly against me Murtagh. Do you honestly believe I was going to fall into either of your traps as recklessly as you would in your anger?”[/i]

“You might have been. After all you were stupid enough to take me on in the first place.” Whether Death was surprised or not was impossible to tell, but he had been forgiven for being so. The group watching below certainly were. How could Murtagh possibly be smirking so smugly in this situation, as he went for his deck again? “Time to say goodbye to Death, as now my full power will be revealed. I draw, and activate the trap card [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Return_from_the_Different_Dimension"]Return from the Different Dimension[/url]. By paying half my life points, I can special summon as many banished monsters my field can manage!”

Murtagh contorted slightly as red aura engulfed him, piercing his body like thousands of needles that drained his energy (LP 800). It was worth it though, after this there would be no more pain, as one giant inter-dimensional portal opened high above them, from which the four dragons Darkblaze, Red Eyes, Starbright and Alexandrite emerged, joining the Five God Dragon. Death observed without comment, as Murtagh reached up to them. “Now I overlay my two level seven dragons, to Xyz summon!” A comet like seal shot across the field, plunging into the castle battlements, and from the hole the silver giant rose, staring down at Death (Rk7, ATK 2600). “Breaker of minds and stealer of souls, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Number_11:_Big_Eye"]Number 11: Big Eye[/url]!”

“Next I summon [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Eclipse_Wyvern"]Eclipse Wyvern[/url] and overlay my three level four dragons to Xyz summon again!” Murtagh continued in frenzy. With a screeching cry, the muscular reddish purple dragon unfurled itself and soared up beside Big Eye (Rk4, ATK 2800). “[url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Number_32:_Shark_Drake"]Number 32: Marine Biting Dragon Shark Drake[/url]!”

[i]“Finally, you have summoned the Numbers”[/i] Death murmured darkly. [i]“But it will do you no good.”[/i]

“We’ll see. Now with these conditions, I activate the magic card [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Xyz_Burst"]Xyz Burst[/url]! Because I control an Xyz monster with a rank higher than five, I can destroy all set cards on your field!” Big Eye squinted, and fired a laser from its dark pupil. Death’s face down card [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Dark_Bribe"]Dark Shrine Bribery[/url] exploded on contact.

“Clever.” Clarissa admitted. “Murtagh didn’t use his opening turn to summon Five God Dragon. He used it to set up his two Numbers; using Future Fusion and Dragon Mirror to deliberately select appropriate monsters to summon them. He must have planned it all from the moment Destiny Leo was summoned without even relying on his last draw. I’ve not seen either of those Numbers before, but I assume one of them can take down Destiny Leo.” Begrudgingly impressed she looked up at the two monsters either side of him, Murtagh seemed supremely confident now, but in her arms Kaneko just shook her head.

“Any last words Death?” Murtagh chuckled. The horseman remained completely stoic. “You know it’s over right? And it could not end any sweeter. I’m not just going to beat you. I’m going to completely embarrass and annihilate you! And even better yet, I’m going to do so with your own monster! Big Eye; do your thing! By detaching an overlay unit, I can steal your monster and turn it into my own devoted minion!” An overlay comet plunged into the giant’s eye; triggering its hypnotic effect, and Murtagh’s victorious laughter. “Destiny Leo will become my servant, and will exterminate its former master! You and anyone who opposes me as I rule my world! Forever!”

[i]“If you’re about done with your shameless bragging, I’d like to activate a card effect.” [/i]Murtagh choked on his cackling as Death interrupted, coolly as you like, telling him he was going to fail. How? What could this guy possibly do to stop him? The answer came quickly as a card in Death’s hand revealed itself, the worst thing for Murtagh to see right now. [i]“With this timing, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Effect_Veiler"]Effect Veiler[/url] negates Big Eye’s effect.”[/i]

Gasps echoed the appearance of the small child as it floated across the field, and Big Eye’s bewitching effect simply ceased. With it, Murtagh dropped to his knees. “You’re kidding me? I’ve lost?”

[i]“Poor deluded boy, you can’t grasp it even now”[/i] Death’s voice sternly echoed for them all to hear. [i]“Your loss was confirmed long ago. Your fate was sealed before the start of this duel, before the start of the world conversion or even the hatching of your quest for domination over two combined realms. You have walked the path marked out for you, never veering. Not through your own choices, but because all paths lead to the same inevitable end, which you now kneel at. You walked it well, now you will be rewarded by being relieved of the greed and paranoia power has burdened you with, and the pain and heartbreak that being orphaned and losing your sister that moulded you. Moulded you as I desired... puppet...”[/i]

Murtagh twitched. Something mentally snapped. The combined weight of everything; the gloating, the thinly veiled threats, the impossibility of him losing this duel, and dying and having his world and dreams taken away, the concept of Death toying with him and really controlling him and his life, all of it swelled together and tore the last of Murtagh’s fragile mind in half. Shaking wildly, he didn’t notice the glowing runes burst into purple flame on the back of his hand, spreading and surrounding his entire body as he stood up, getting to a weird angle, cackling in a deranged and disjointed way. Death did not react, simply watching carefully, whilst below them, Daiki recognised what was coming, as the golden swirl opened beneath Shark Drake’s reformed seal to give birth to a new one.

“A Chaos Number?” he muttered, distracting everyone for a moment, before Murtagh’s cackling bought them back to the duel.

“It’s... not... over...yet” he grinned. “I use the power Xyz Change... on the Number 32: Shark Drake... to create a force far more powerful than the brat or you could ever imagine!” From the vortex a crystal like seal rose, shattering to release a much larger sea dragon than before. This time instead of dark red, the scales were snowy white (Rk4, ATK 2800). “Arise true power; [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Number_C32%3A_Shark_Drake_Veiss"]Chaos Number 32: Shark Drake Vice[/url]!”

“Chaos Number? Shark Drake Vice?” Clarissa gasped in awe as she stared open mouthed up at the white dragon. Jin couldn’t believe his eyes either; even Kaneko of all people was stunned. However Dai looked up at the creature with a much less amazed expression, as if he expected it somehow, and Sakura was quite unaffected by it too. But then he’d said something to suggest he did. “Dai? Kaneko? What is that?”

“I... I have no idea...” Kaneko breathed softly. “I’ve never seen it before. Daddy?”

“I’m not that sure. It’s like an upgraded version of its old form, summoned through the Xyz change technique” Daiki began. “Remember how Murtagh summoned that Dragoon thing against you and Jin, and said only you two could use it freely? Well when I was facing Death and he had me beaten, and the end seemed inevitable and that I’d failed everyone... I don’t know what happened, but Hope turned into this thing called a Chaos Number through a similar method. It saved my life, but I’ve no idea how.”

“When we duelled Yudai, I did something similar too” Sakura admitted. “Not with a Number, but with my Sacred. Yudai was being controlled and corrupted by those Verz cards, I was so scared, and so desperate to help him, I lost control, and then suddenly this Sacred dragon turns up.”

“Hmm... I see...” Kaneko muttered to herself as everyone looked to her. “Xyz Change is something I only heard sensei mention once. It was something I couldn’t be taught til I was older and ready. I wonder... if someone felt an intense emotional state, and those emotions connected with a monster in the right...”

“So Death’s seen it before?” Jin asked as Kaneko trailed off into her own thoughts. “That would explain why he didn’t lose his composure like we all did. In fact nothing seems to affect him at all.” Indeed, the pale knight remained almost oblivious to the change he had reacted so little, despite the rapidly downward spiralling sanity of Murtagh’s laughing. “So Kaneko, who’s in control of who up there?”

“This is... the true power... of the Numbers...” Murtagh giggled. “It’s so glorious! It’s wonderful! I can feel it coursing through every part of me. I can control everything with this. Now my dear Death... I am about to do what many men have yearned for centuries to accomplish...and that is... conquer you, and banish you forever! Shark Drake Vice’s effect... activates! By detaching an overlay unit, and by banishing the detached Red Eyes Black Dragon from my cemetery, your monsters attack points become zero!”

Everyone gasped as the great lion’s attack plummeted (ATK 0). Death had nothing left to defend it, and if this attack connected...

“It’s over!” Murtagh screamed. “Shark Drake Vice, attack and kill Death forever! Chaos Depth Bite!”

Spinning its massive frame like a razor blade so fast that it generated a blur of energy around itself, Vice blasted over Death’s head and slammed itself into the crippled frame of Destiny Leo, the resulting explosion of energy engulfing all three of them. Across the field, Murtagh started to laugh even more wildly, rolling around like an exciting school child, shouting between ragged breaths as the smoke continued to billow across the castle roof. “I conquered Death! I conquered Death! With this new power of Chaos Xyz Change, no-one can ever hope to stop me now!”

[i]“...ah hah hah hah hah hah... ahaaah haaah haaah haaah haaah... AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!”[/i]

Murtagh slowly sat up and looked at the shadows appearing in the fading smoke. Shark Drake Vice re-emerged, suspended in mid-air. Destiny Leo was gone. But to his and the others horror Death was still standing there, just below the shark that was stuck a few metres away from him, ignoring its snarling efforts to bite his head off and laughing his helmet off, completely unmoved by the attack (LP 2200).

“What!? But how?” Murtagh gasped.

[i]“From my cemetery, I activate the effect of the trap I destroyed earlier, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Explosive_Wall"]Dynamite Wall[/url]. I had no need to sacrifice Destiny Leo to use its first effect against Five God Dragon, not when I expected more from you. However by banishing it along with Destiny Leo, the attack is negated and the battle phase ended.”[/i]

“You activated a trap... from the cemetery..? Ah whatever... it’s over anyway” Murtagh growled as Shark Drake Vice returned to his side of the field. “Eclipse Wyvern was detached, so I get to banish a high level dragon from my deck. You’ve got no cards left, and there’s nothing you can draw that can take down my three mighty monsters. You’re finished.” [i]‘And with Red Eyes Dark Metal Dragon on the way, and the card in my hand being the epitome of a chaos dragon’s deck; [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Light_and_Darkness_Dragon"]Light and Darkness Dragon[/url], you will be.’[/i]

The pale horseman chuckled. That same deep and ominous chuckle as his D-Disk shimmered once more. [i]“The way you cling to the notion that you can actually defeat me somehow is amusing. Is it hope, or is it arrogance? Or are you just trying to block the fear? Yes, I can see it in you. You know that I can defeat you with my next draw. You don’t know how, but you just know, and you try to bury the fear by deluding yourself that my deck will fail me. That it won’t provide what I need. Do you really believe that is going to happen now?”[/i] The drawn card materialised in Death’s hand, and Murtagh flinched. No, he was letting himself be manipulated; there was nothing that could reverse this situation. Nothing at all. There was no way he could have got such a card... could he? Then why was he feeling like this? Why was he looking at that card, and praying for it to be something bad with all his might? What was this guy trying to do?

Death casually glanced down at the card. Murtagh held his breath. Daiki, Clarissa, Jin and Sakura had long been holding there’s for some time. Sitting in her mother’s arms, Kaneko shivered. She sensed something about the horseman had changed. Something dreadful was going to happen. Something about that card in Death’s hand... something badly wrong... truly wrong was about to reveal itself...

Death looked up at Murtagh. His voice did not change, still cold and emotionless, simply stating the fact that this was the end. [i]“As expected Murtagh, your prayer for a reprieve has not been answered. My deck has decided to reveal its true form at last. Because there are no monsters in my control, I activate the effect of Hall of Gods Valhalla once again to special summon an angel type monster from my hand. A special angel that is the true... face... of my deck. Now come...”[/i]

The air between the stone pillars rippled as the monster came through, and Sakura, Kaneko and Clarissa immediately screamed. Jin froze rigid with fright as this... thing, this abominable machine took form. Even Daiki, usually composed, felt sick. A thin humanoid machine with long gangly arms and a tapered body floated through the portal, mostly red and blue in colour, wings spreading from its large shoulder blades unmoving. The thing, it could only be reasonably described as a thing, had a metal head, but it was blank. But the worst part of it, the feature that heralded such reactions, was the glass ruby coloured pane in the centre of its chest. Reflected in that pane was a face! A twisted, insidious face with wild eyes and a thin mouth, an insane inhuman expression contorted by the spirit trapped in that pane (Lv10, ATK 0)! Below it, Death roared victoriously. [i]“Behold my true power, [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Metaion%2C_the_Timelord"]Temporal Machine God Metaion[/url]!”[/i]

Close to mental collapse as the thing emerged, Murtagh panicked. “What... what the hell is that?!”

[i]“This is Metaion, one of ten beings known as the Temporal Machine Gods. They are a range of cards that were created for me alone; much like the little prodigy has her Photons. They are the silent watchers, surveying events from another dimension without interference as I have for half a century, until now. They are the strongest cards ever created, something you were never worthy of, and now Metaion will assist me as your liberator. Metaion, attack Shark Drake Vice!”[/i]

“Vice’s effect activates during either player’s turn, reducing your... hang on!” In his panic, he had assumed the worst without looking at its stats. But they were zero. Not that that was stopping the thing, grinning maniacally as it locked its gaze on him and raising its two long arms. “But it has no attack?”

[i]“Ignorant fool. You rely so heavily on the phantasmal powers of the Numbers, but the Temporal Machine God’s power far outweighs even them. They cannot be destroyed by battle with any monster, and they also take no damage from battles.”[/i] For the first time Death broke his left arm away to brandish a hand at him. [i]“Also, after Metaion has battled, all monsters you control are returned to your hand!”[/i]

“What!?” This monster did all that!? Still, there was one thing Death had forgotten about. His other face down. “Trap activate; [url="http://yugioh.wikia.com/wiki/Mirror_Force"]Holy Barrier - Mirror Force[/url]! This destroys your attacking monster!”

[i]“You really believe that will save you from a divine entity, one that has had an eternity to prepare for such a predictable trap?”[/i] Death interrupted again, making him jump. [i]“Another effect of the Temporal Gods. As well as being immune to battle destruction, they are also immune to effect destruction! Your trap has no effect!”[/i] The wave of light passed over Metaion, succeeding only in broadening its deranged grin. Unperturbed it retaliated with a forceful shockwave, rippling through the air, smashing into Five God Dragon, Big Eye, and Shark Drake Vice. Each monster screamed as they faded into nothingness. Beneath them, Murtagh just stood there, looking slightly dazed, feeling completely numb.

[i]“Metaion’s unique effect activates”[/i] Death announced solemnly. [i]“For each monster that leaves the field by this effect, its owner receives three hundred points of damage.”[/i]

Balls of flame burst into life in the machine’s hands. Metaion launched them without hesitation; each fireball passing through Murtagh’s body in quick succession, the force of the final one lifted him of his feet (LP 0). Murtagh barely uttered a cry as his body fell through space, his lifeless eyes wide with shock, before his body turned to stardust. The kids shared appalled reactions as they watched his body disintergrated into a million glowing particles, and they floated away into space, towards the swirl overhead. In a matter of seconds, they were staring into empty space; all remains of him were gone.

“That’s...” Jin stuttered. “That was just barbaric.”

“I don’t believe it” Kaneko breathed weakly. “That was... so cruel.”

Clarissa and Daiki exchanged a stunned look. This guy had defeated Murtagh almost effortlessly. He had manipulated him entirely, and some of the things he had said sounded unbelievable. And that Metaion thing, the sadistic monster fading back into the other dimension above them, was his true, unbeatable ace, and was not the only one of its kind that they were about to face!? This... this was madness!

So entranced by their fear and confusion, the group couldn’t move as the pale horseman descended from above, arms folded across his powerful frame and looking facelessly down at them, the insects against him. He continued to float above them as he spoke. [i]“So, you are the five left of those who came here believing the final judgement could be stopped? Well now you have witnessed for yourselves that the power of Death cannot be overcome. With this truth, what do you wish to do now? To be released painlessly from your misery and hopelessness by me now, or return to the world for its last moments?”[/i]

Nobody spoke for a minute. They were all just looking up at him with a mixture of terrified and disbelieving expressions. That was understandable. [i]“Well?”[/i]

The group exchanged looks, and silently made their resolve. No words were spoken. Words weren’t needed. As Death waited, the expressions of each of them changed one by one from fear to anger in the face of the young girl, the scared yet determined look of the young lad, a steely purpose in the woman and the little girl in her arms, and a pure hatred in the eyes of the man who looked up and spoke first on their behalf. “Neither. You think we’re just going to go away and leave things like this, and let you get away with all the murder and destruction you’ve caused? We’re not just going to accept this is the end of everything without a fight!”

“I don’t know who you are or what you think it is you’ll accomplish with this, but I won’t let you destroy my daughter’s future, or anyone else’s” Clarissa added, Kaneko nodding furiously beside her. “I’ve only just got my life back, and promised her a new one. I’ve endured the misery and have a hopeful future ahead, just like millions of others who do not deserve to be robbed of their futures together by you. I won’t let you take it away now.”

“I’m fighting too” Sakura shouted, arming her own D-Disk in a frenzy. “You warped my love into a monster and made him do all those things that have done this. I won’t let you just get away with that!”

“I’ve only lived and experienced a small portion of my life too, and I’m yet to meet more amazing people like the friends I’ve made today” Jin added. “You can’t tell me everyone would be better off not having any of that. I’m fighting with my friends too, and not letting you take them all away.”

“Alright Death, how’s that for an answer?” Dai growled as the others stepped up beside him. “You heard them; none of us are going to accept what you’re doing is right because we’ve all got our own reasons; friends, family, things to live for, or just to beat the hell out of you. If you still can’t see that ensuring life is better than accepting death, then you’re going to have to fight all of us. Together, we can beat you.”

Death continued to stare blindly down at them all, chuckling darkly to himself. [i]“Five against one? You really believe you can defeat me and the unstoppable might of the Temporal Machine Gods with such pitiful odds? Do you honestly think that you five mud puppies can change a thing in this disgusting world, let alone its destiny, compared to the immortal deity of lost souls that is I, the angel of Death? Foolish beings, you don’t stand a chance. But if you really insist on continuing to struggle helplessly against your sorrow and anger, then I will oblige you, and liberate you of your suffering as I did poor Murtagh.”[/i]

“All right guys this is it” Daiki rallied, arming his D-Disk along with the others. “Whatever happens we’ve got to work together and beat this guy, but I know somehow we can do it. And... huh?”

Daiki blinked, his D-Gazer was buzzing in his ear. That was odd; he didn’t expect it to work here and had more or less forgotten about it. However it was working, as a ghost of a face reflected in his eye.

[i]“Hey Dai, not so fast there mate”[/i] the speaker said.[i] “I can’t let you fight this one.”[/i]

“Garvan?!” Daiki blurted to everyone’s amazement. “You’re alive? What on earth are you on about?”

[i]“I was listening in on your conversation and how you’re going to all fight the big boss together” [/i]Garvan explained. There was a noticeable hint of panic in his voice, mixed with delirium. [i]“But I’m afraid I can’t let you. I need you here back in Tokyo, and I need you here right now.”[/i]

“Oh really, now? You need me now?” Daiki couldn’t believe this. Was this guy serious? “Garvan, I know you’re messed up at the moment, so let me make it real clear. Right now I’ve got to fight this Death guy to save [i]all of existence[/i]! That includes you pal! If we don’t beat him, then everything is finished.”

[i]“Oh yeah. Well from where I’m standing the end of existence is looking pretty good right now. Besides, that’s not why you’re really fighting is it? You just want revenge for Natsumi. Well good news, you don’t need to worry about that anymore...”[/i] Garvan pulled, and to his horror Natsumi came into view. She was tied and gagged, and clearly terrified. [i]“She’s still alive Dai, although how much longer for is up to you.”[/i]

“Natsumi!” Daiki shouted, unaware everyone else was watching only half in on the conversation. It was just him and Garvan, glaring at each other as Natsumi struggled weakly. “You bastard, let her go!”

[i]“Given that I’m standing on a roof of a twelve story hotel, that’s a pretty bad choice of phrase don’t you think?”[/i] The image turned to indeed show a long drop below, before returning to Garvan. Daiki’s spare reaction sickeningly amused him. [i]“We’re on top of the Royal Hotel in Kawaguchi. You’ve got one hour.”[/i]

The image disappeared as the call ended, leaving Daiki free to drop to his knees in complete breakdown.

“Natsumi. Oh man, what the hell do I do? If I don’t go right now, Garvan’s going to kill Natsumi! I can’t lose her, not now. But if I go and save her then I’ll be putting everyone’s lives at risk with my selfishness. I can’t leave you guys against this maniac! What am I supposed to do?” The others just looked at him in shock as he despaired; no-one could offer anything in way of a solution.

“Daddy, what’s wrong?” Kaneko asked, having dropped from Clarissa’s arms and tugging on his jacket. “Natsumi... is she someone really special to you too? I thought that you just felt like that with mommy?”

“It’s... complicated sweetie” Clarissa said, scooping up Kaneko as she dropped beside Dai. Her touch against his face was soft and caring. Kaneko just looked between them with a very confused look. They looked caring, but then there was Natsumi too? What was going on? Daiki just held onto Clarissa and continued struggling with his impossible dilemma. “Dai, I’m really sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

“I... can’t leave you guys... But I can’t abandon Nat... she’s always been there for me and... the last year apart has been... I can’t leave her either” he continued to blub. “I don’t know what to do.”

“... Daddy. You should go and help Natsumi.”

Daiki gulped as Kaneko looked at him and smiled. “I know what you said about us fighting together, but I can see you need her. She’s special to you, and she needs you too. Don’t be sad. Me and mommy can handle this, along with our friends. Or don’t you trust us?”

“Yeah... I mean no... I mean” Dai floundered. “But I’ve only just met you... both of you... I can’t leave you against...”

“You’re right, he doesn’t trust us” Clarissa sniped as she stood up (pulling Daiki up with her). “Daiki, I’ve never really talked to Natsumi much, but I can tell she’s a good girl, and good for you. If you abandon her now, I would never forgive you. Now don’t worry, we can handle this guy. You go rescue her.”

Desperately he turned to the others for their thoughts. Jin gave him a thumbs up, typical of that kid, and Sakura gave him a kindly nod. They were fine with what he had to do. “Alright” he croaked. “Thank you guys... for everything. Just... just beat this guy and all come back alive you hear? I promise to take care of Garvan and save Natsumi, and then we can all come away from this together, okay?” Each one put their hand out for the other and last embrace, before the miserable Dai turned to the silently waiting Death. “Guess you really have got the devil following close behind after all. I’d like to go home now.”

[i]“Very well.”[/i] Without a further word a rip similar to the entrance to the abyss opened beside Daiki, and with one last yearning look at the others, he walked through it.

[i]“Pitiful mortal”[/i] Death muttered as the rip sealed itself after him. [i]“His mission is pointless. But his weak suffering emotions, the blackmail of his former ally, and the situation they are in; all are proof that it is better to not exist at all than in this world. As for the four of you, prepare yourselves. We are about to take a journey across this doomed world, for what will be the last duel in its history before it perishes.”[/i]

The hell were they going to let him unnerve them now. United; Sakura, Jinrei, Kaneko and Clarissa stood together as
the pale horseman floated upwards again, this faceless unknown demon bent on oblivion, laughing in such a way that they were able to naturally connect a face to him that so unnervingly fitted.

[i]“...ah hah hah hah hah hah... ahaaah haaah haaah haaah haaah... AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!”[/i]

07:59:58... 07:59:59... 08:00:00...[/spoiler]

...

...

... so... comments?

[Umbra]

[spoiler=[b]"DEUS EX MACHI-[/b]"]
No, that didn't actually happen this time.

The chapter was definitely up to par. Your characterization is as good as ever. Even if Death is a bit of a clichéd villain, you write him well and plays his part perfectly. The duel was enjoyable, even if [i]THIS IS NOT EVEN MY FINAL FORM [/i]comes to mind with FGD / C39 and Destiny Leo / Metaion. The Temporal Machine God does seem very odd in this context, but then again, so do the horsemen themselves.

Politician line was really good as well, with Junichi going out like a badass. The married couple was a nice touch as well; definitely the kind of "background" story that gives the world the kind of flavor it needs.

However, I'm very disappointed with Garvan and his revolving-door-loyalty syndrome. Right now, it just feels like a plot device to keep Daiki from dueling Death. Not to mention that the plot armor grows even thicker, with neither Garvan nor Natsumi actually being dead.

Oh, and Death was the first avatar of the VDS, wasn't he?
[/spoiler]

[Canopy Star - Eon Sphere]

[spoiler=SPOILERZ] I don't even know what Garvan is doing any more. I really, really, really[i], really[/i] hope he has a good excuse for all of this. Because it's just getting ridiculous.

Murtagh's defeat was inevitable but amusing. I thought he was going to get Destiny Leo, and then it would get veiler'd. Death having Fairies bodes ill for the other 4, given the sheer number of aces he could pull out at a moment's notice. Looking forward to it though. Poor Destiny Leo never gets to finish its effect

Hideo's arc seems to have/be coming to a conclusion now, which is good, but it lacked something, I think. I guess I wouldn't expect him to Duel, but y'know, Tarao getting munched and then Junichi being the hero just seems a little... boring. The rest of the story is great, but I guess Hideo never really became who we all wanted him to be. The protagonists are usually referred to as heroes for a reason. [/spoiler]

[Aerion Brightflame]

Ok.... that was unexpected...

[spoiler='Macarena']
Sooo, no one good has died(side from Hunter)? Kinda killed the mood.... I mean so very badly. I was still sad bout Nat :'(

I have to say, despite a Fairy deck seeming like a great and thematically a good choice, the duel was frankly crap. Its irritating becuase it had to happen. Murtagh was always going to get his arse handed to him, but he seemed more like Yuma than the bad-ass Psycho he used to be. To think of it... his badass kinda went down throughout this entire arc. But no, it bored me. Frankly thats the most disappointing duel of the fic so far.

Garvan... kinda confused me there. I mean? Why it did just seem like a plot device to get him out of the way. Though the love triangle Dai has is quite funny. Given his daughter being a god, and probably wanting her parents together.

The 4 on 1 should be alright. Aside from, well it going down to just having Clarrisa, when Dai makes a wild reapperance methinks. With Garvan, packing Galaxy Queen, and Nat using her Corny. Since wouldn't Corn escape the time lord immunities?

Death is cool, if over cliched. But he is the type of character who needs a cliche to work I wager.

And I nearly forgot the sheer awesomeness of the Politician plotline. I mean it could not have been any cooler. Best part of the chapter easily.
[/spoiler]

Thats what I got, not majorly happy with it, but it was still great. And if Vanessa did that, I'm afraid she'd have to kill you....

[Northern Sage]

[quote name='Umbra' timestamp='1352482049' post='6064837']
[spoiler=[b]"DEUS EX MACHI-[/b]"]
No, that didn't actually happen this time.

The chapter was definitely up to par. Your characterization is as good as ever. Even if Death is a bit of a clichéd villain, you write him well and plays his part perfectly. The duel was enjoyable, even if [i]THIS IS NOT EVEN MY FINAL FORM [/i]comes to mind with FGD / C39 and Destiny Leo / Metaion. The Temporal Machine God does seem very odd in this context, but then again, so do the horsemen themselves.

Politician line was really good as well, with Junichi going out like a badass. The married couple was a nice touch as well; definitely the kind of "background" story that gives the world the kind of flavor it needs.

However, I'm very disappointed with Garvan and his revolving-door-loyalty syndrome. Right now, it just feels like a plot device to keep Daiki from dueling Death. Not to mention that the plot armor grows even thicker, with neither Garvan nor Natsumi actually being dead.

Oh, and Death was the first avatar of the VDS, wasn't he?
[/spoiler]
[/quote]
Can't be. Odion died later than Unmai's revival.
The [s]3[/s] 2 alternatives that come to mind are:
A: The second avatar, the one between Odion and Murtagh.
B: Shinawatra. As the president of RD, he could know enough about the Virtual World to do something like this.
[s]C: ZON*shot*[/s]

Anyhow, great chapter.

[Umbra]

Didn't it go Mystery #1 -> Odion -> Murtagh -> Kaneko? Granted, I did skip over that part of the story, but that's what I got out of the arc summary.

[Brinolovania]

[spoiler=creative spoiler name]
Hm...can't say Murtagh's loss was a surprise. Can't say I was expecting Metaion either. The duel as a whole was pretty good for the purpose of Murtagh dies, Death is teh most strongest. The politician plot is doing stuff...I assume that'll have a bit more to it. Poor young married dead peeps

I do agree with everyone else though. Da frick is Garvan doing? He's like...loyally bipolar or something.

Overall, good chapter. I assume the remaining few will wrap up Hideo's side of things, and explain Garvan somehow.
[/spoiler]

[Synchronized]

Quite good.

Didn't like it as much as I liked the last Chapter but that's only because Death's character did feel insanely generic. Like others above me have said though, that's almost a necessity given the context so I can't complain.

The whole Garvan thing threw me off so I'm looking forward to seeing the resolution there as well.

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

Mental night at work (spent hour and half getting wet and bailing because the upstairs kitchen flooded due to a burst pipe and leaked down into back office where all the main hotel computers are :\) . So first chance to check this. Lot of responses, as ever will respond to all.

[quote name='Umbra' timestamp='1352482049' post='6064837']
[spoiler=[b]"DEUS EX MACHI-[/b]"]
No, that didn't actually happen this time.

The chapter was definitely up to par. Your characterization is as good as ever. Even if Death is a bit of a clichéd villain, you write him well and plays his part perfectly. The duel was enjoyable, even if [i]THIS IS NOT EVEN MY FINAL FORM [/i]comes to mind with FGD / C39 and Destiny Leo / Metaion. The Temporal Machine God does seem very odd in this context, but then again, so do the horsemen themselves.

Politician line was really good as well, with Junichi going out like a badass. The married couple was a nice touch as well; definitely the kind of "background" story that gives the world the kind of flavor it needs.

However, I'm very disappointed with Garvan and his revolving-door-loyalty syndrome. Right now, it just feels like a plot device to keep Daiki from dueling Death. Not to mention that the plot armor grows even thicker, with neither Garvan nor Natsumi actually being dead.

Oh, and Death was the first avatar of the VDS, wasn't he?
[/spoiler]
[/quote]

Par. That's progress! Awesome.

Death was always going to use one of two decks. The first was TMG's; due to their abilities that sort of 'out-Number the Numbers' as it were, and their established reputation as incredibly strong villians. The second choice you might all be interested to discover was Lightrays. In the quest to be uptodate and cutting edge they looked awesome and capable of ridiculous spamming moves initially, and evil guys using light monsters are cool. But sadly they haven't really been developed on. Heraldic Beasts also came into mind for about 10 seconds. So yeah, fairy deck with high level bosses such as the Fallen Angels and TMG's it was. Although they fit in with the time theme of 24 though.

Yep, I had a feeling that was coming. When was it ever confirmed either of them was dead? Natsumi shut her eyes and Dai went into full breakdown (making him not the best person to rationally judge) before he was warped off. He never went anywhere near Garvan. Yeah it looked like they were dead, I was meant to derp you all... and... that may not have been appreciated I fear..... um.... *looks awkward*.... Besides, there's still two chapters left.

[quote name='The Seal of Eon' timestamp='1352487364' post='6064906']
[spoiler=SPOILERZ] I don't even know what Garvan is doing any more. I really, really, really[i], really[/i] hope he has a good excuse for all of this. Because it's just getting ridiculous.

Murtagh's defeat was inevitable but amusing. I thought he was going to get Destiny Leo, and then it would get veiler'd. Death having Fairies bodes ill for the other 4, given the sheer number of aces he could pull out at a moment's notice. Looking forward to it though. Poor Destiny Leo never gets to finish its effect

Hideo's arc seems to have/be coming to a conclusion now, which is good, but it lacked something, I think. I guess I wouldn't expect him to Duel, but y'know, Tarao getting munched and then Junichi being the hero just seems a little... boring. The rest of the story is great, but I guess Hideo never really became who we all wanted him to be. The protagonists are usually referred to as heroes for a reason. [/spoiler]
[/quote]

Serves him right for being an alternate win condition.

Hideo's arc is more or less over now as the hotel refugees have gone into hiding and are sealed/buried in the hotel. I agree, it started slowly as I struggled with it early on but yeah it may have lacked a spark. I'm not that much into politics which probably doesn't help. Hideo I'd like to think developed a lot, more so than most of the duelists, but he isn't the most heroic chap. He tried though.

[quote name='Archbaron Barthandelus' timestamp='1352495881' post='6065031']
Ok.... that was unexpected...

[spoiler='Macarena']
Sooo, no one good has died(side from Hunter)? Kinda killed the mood.... I mean so very badly. I was still sad bout Nat :'(

I have to say, despite a Fairy deck seeming like a great and thematically a good choice, the duel was frankly crap. Its irritating becuase it had to happen. Murtagh was always going to get his arse handed to him, but he seemed more like Yuma than the bad-ass Psycho he used to be. To think of it... his badass kinda went down throughout this entire arc. But no, it bored me. Frankly thats the most disappointing duel of the fic so far.

Garvan... kinda confused me there. I mean? Why it did just seem like a plot device to get him out of the way. Though the love triangle Dai has is quite funny. Given his daughter being a god, and probably wanting her parents together.

The 4 on 1 should be alright. Aside from, well it going down to just having Clarrisa, when Dai makes a wild reapperance methinks. With Garvan, packing Galaxy Queen, and Nat using her Corny. Since wouldn't Corn escape the time lord immunities?

Death is cool, if over cliched. But he is the type of character who needs a cliche to work I wager.

And I nearly forgot the sheer awesomeness of the Politician plotline. I mean it could not have been any cooler. Best part of the chapter easily.
[/spoiler]

Thats what I got, not majorly happy with it, but it was still great. And if Vanessa did that, I'm afraid she'd have to kill you....
[/quote]

Owch.

Murtagh really came across that bad? Geez, that sucks. I was desperately trying to avoid it going all Aporia vs Z-One with Aporia doing the generic 'I'm a good guy now I've lost' thing. Wanted to keep Murtagh an unhinged world domination obsessed villian until the end and have two bad guys fit to the... well to the death. One bent on domination, one bent on destruction and both contrasting in styles, that was the goal. Sorry the duel didn't really live up to expectations, probably the inevitability of the result didn't help, I think there's definately been worse personally (Izura vs Rokuro, Daiki vs Natsumi).

[b]Regarding Dai's absense from the final duel[/b]: It's been planned from the start, Daiki was never going to face Death (except through Unmai). The means with Garvan was about as subtle as a hammer way to go about it, but I just didn't ever want Dai involved. Because that's too predictable for him to win with KIYBOU HOPE!! I was amused by all the predictions for the final battle people made with Dai, Kaneko, Murtagh vs Death or Dai, Clarissa, Kaneko vs Death and was just sitting here grinning saying 'you're all nowhere near/in for a nasty surprise'. Cuz I'm a jerk.

Glad the political side story and Death himself made up for it a little. As for the finale, we'll wait and see. Hopefully will have been able to pull something special out the bag to count the clock down with a bang. aha aha aha aha aha.... AH HA HA HA HA!! (I'm getting that nailed down I think).

I'll take my chances.

[quote name='Tama the Chibi Sage' timestamp='1352503240' post='6065143']
Can't be. Odion died later than Unmai's revival.
The [s]3[/s] 2 alternatives that come to mind are:
A: The second avatar, the one between Odion and Murtagh.
B: Shinawatra. As the president of RD, he could know enough about the Virtual World to do something like this.
[s]C: ZON*shot*[/s]

Anyhow, great chapter.
[/quote]

Thanks dude. Interesting theories.

[quote name='Umbra' timestamp='1352505055' post='6065168']
Didn't it go Mystery #1 -> Odion -> Murtagh -> Kaneko? Granted, I did skip over that part of the story, but that's what I got out of the arc summary.
[/quote]

This is correct. [b]Orion[/b] was the second avatar. Not Marik's servant.

[quote name='Pacmanexus' timestamp='1352521201' post='6065370']
[spoiler=creative spoiler name]
Hm...can't say Murtagh's loss was a surprise. Can't say I was expecting Metaion either. The duel as a whole was pretty good for the purpose of Murtagh dies, Death is teh most strongest. The politician plot is doing stuff...I assume that'll have a bit more to it. Poor young married dead peeps

I do agree with everyone else though. Da frick is Garvan doing? He's like...loyally bipolar or something.

Overall, good chapter. I assume the remaining few will wrap up Hideo's side of things, and explain Garvan somehow.
[/spoiler]
[/quote]

The result was never really in doubt, so it was all about the method and the oh crap moment about Metaion's appearance. Damn Athena; why couldn't you be level 8? Making me waste cards on Galaxy Queen's Light again? That made it harder on its own.

[b]Addressing the Garvan thing as a whole[/b]: Yes, his actions are jerkish in the extreme and beyond all sane reasoning. But desperate men do desperate things, and Garvan's loyalty is only to one person (and no, it isn't Death as a quandruple agent for him, although I personally quite liked him turning out to the 'the devil following Death' as Dai put it. Seemed a nice line.) That's as much as I'm going to say on it for now. Was hoping Dai's impossible dilemma would get more of a reaction, but understand it being swamped by wtf? at Garvan.

Thank you for reading/reviewing.

[quote name='- Neo -' timestamp='1352524951' post='6065424']
Quite good.

Didn't like it as much as I liked the last Chapter but that's only because Death's character did feel insanely generic. Like others above me have said though, that's almost a necessity given the context so I can't complain.

The whole Garvan thing threw me off so I'm looking forward to seeing the resolution there as well.
[/quote]

Pestilence's duel definately overshadowed this (penultimate duel syndrome is a thing I think, I always find them disappointing in the anime).

[b]Regarding general comments about Death[/b]: I know he's a bit generic, esp for those who have read Armageddon probably as a 'we've been here before'. Two chapters to flesh him out a bit, but I can't see the forth horseman and embodiment of lost souls ever being the cult of personality. I find Death extremely easy to right, probably because of my own doomy gloomy mentality, he gets some pretty long morbid speeches which just reeled off so easy. We'll see.

Think that's everything. It better be, that took forever.

[Umbra]

It's not about confirming their deaths, it's about the impact those death scenes had. You have essentially nullified whatever you were trying to accomplish with "killing" them in that duel, and combined with your otherwise near-perfect record when it comes to keeping the protagonists alive, it's just [i]disappointing.[/i] Expecting more from you, I was.

The thing about this "This was always going to happen" excuse that you keep using is that that's exactly what it is. We the readers do not know everything that's going on in the story, and you the writer has to remember that. Things always have to make [i]sense[/i] to the reader. There's a difference between "this was unknown to us before" and "that came absolutely out of nowhere", and quite frankly, we're seeing more of the latter than of the former. Garvan becomes the tool to get Dai away from the final duel, rather than being "subtle as a hammer" when demonstrating it. It's just bad writing.

What is Garvan desperate about, exactly? Making the fic seem more original? Because that's certainly what I'm getting from your responses.

Oh, and you can [i]always[/i] give a character a personality. Death didn't have to be such a generic villain if you'd designed him differently.

[Vector Nightmare]

.......eh.

From the beginning, I had assumed the Apocalypse Knights would be a secondary element, parallel antagonists that cause all sorts of trouble during the course of the main plot, and end up as a threat that requires forces to be diverted in order to be dealt with, as well as tying up loose plot threads and resolving some character arcs. To be the ones to actively seize the main antagonist spot and dominate the scene as the final threat... no, I don't think they were qualified for that as a plot element, and the latest chapter pretty much proves this, in my view at least. They just don't have enough relevance to fill the spot. If you compare this, say, to Fygmorke stepping up after Demon in Armageddon, this falls far short. We had known about Fygmorke - agenda, motivation, character and all - for ages and his development into the final villain had been built up carefully for a while. It doesn't help at all that the Apocalypse group is basically ALL THE GENERIC. Unmai, Vladimir and Yuudai are basically archetypal examples of brainwashed good guys and with the exception of Vladimir follow the typical plot course of such characters to the letter. The plot twist that they were dead to begin with isn't enough to really set them apart especially since it makes no plot difference at all. And if they are generic, I don't even have to get started on Death. I was expecting something at least a bit shocking about him in the last chapter but he was the embodiment of predictability, a walking evil mastermind trope. And unfortunately his bout against Murtagh was nothing more than WORFING ALL THE WORFING - it reminded so much of ZONE vs Aporia it was painful. But I will talk about Death in more detail later, so for now I will shift my focus to the previous chapter.

Anyone who had been paying close attention to the story from the beginning would immediately realize what dead guys coming back to life as evil brainwashed duelists was leading up to, in terms of Sakura's character arc. Surprisingly, or perhaps not so much, we have Clarissa's presence as well. Eventually, it can be said that Clarissa and Sakura are the two characters to be connected to Yuudai, so there should be no complaints there. Clarissa and Sakura have developed some synergy between themselves, and Clarissa is probably my favorite character in the story anyway. All-in-all, we were in for an interesting chapter. The encounter begins as straightforward as it gets. Sakura can't be brought to harm Yuudai, whose twisted mindset is, again, pretty direct and without any surprises. Probably the biggest surprise for me was Yuudai's deck - I had expected the final villain (ergo, Death) to be your Verz user. I liked how Verz connects Yuudai to his Horseman title, but I will complain that Vladimir and Unmai's decks didn't change accordingly to fit (Famine using Madolche would have been a ridiculously entertaining thought. Vladimir could've used Gladiator Beasts or something similar. Actually I think GBs would have fit Vladimir more in general. But it's understandable that you were gunning for newer archetypes).

I was a bit irritated with Sakura basically switching between "I have to fight him!" and "I can't fight him!" figuratively every second sentence. It climbed a bit past the "emotionally-provoking inner conflict" stage and into the "make up your mind, woman!" stage. Also Yuudai connecting their duel to the Duel Terminal story was... probably the most terribly-timed thing anyone has ever said in the fic. There's a time and place for everything, and that wasn't the time and place for narrating the conflict of the Duel Monsters world.

Now, my opening paragraph and general tone of the review probably betray that these weren't my favorite chapters, overall. Well, rejoice, because there is a certain part in these chapters that stands out majorly. And that is, you guessed it, Hideo's plot thread that surgically interrupts the duel right now. Tarao's plot, Junichi initially playing along with it, Hideo's and Tarao's confrontation, Tarao's reasoning, and his end by Junichi's figurative hand were all just yes. Yeah, we may not have gotten a proper duel out of these guys, but it was never needed, and this was just about the best way it could all be done (in conjunction with the resolution in the next chapter, of course, but all in good time). I wonder if Tarao realized that it was Junichi's monsters that did him in.

Back to Yuudai vs Clarissa and Sakura. Clarissa defending Sakura was a nice move, as well as Sakura summoning Shock Ruler with Clarissa's prodding. I think that, as well as Yuudai's reaction to it, was my favorite part of the trio's duel and interaction. Well, I won't reject evil!Yuudai's crowning moment of awesome either, as bringing out all 3 Verz dragons at once was a very nice touch. And speaking of crowning moments of awesome, it looks like Junichi is due to get his as well. I mentioned it already, but the politician storyline is my favorite part of the plot right now.

The LP reduction = Verz corrosion was a pretty nice touch, really made me feel for Sakura here. It was clear from the beginning that Clarissa is in a secondary / supporting role in this duel, a fact which I have no complaints with. She does a pretty good job at it, by clearing out Yuudai's formidable field with her new ace, Adreus. But Yuudai finally unleashes his Number, and even without overemphasizing the nigh-memetic GOD RAGE cry, it gets pretty cool.

Unfortunately... what has been a very well scripted fight, with an appropriate amount of drama and excitement, so far... has to be marred during its last few turns. Sakura's summoning of Ptolemys is just so... bland, without her even realizing what she's doing, that it actually makes Murtagh's 'HURR DURR LOOK HOW I AWESOMELY SUMMON THIS MONSTER IN A SUPER SPECIAL WAY and then sacrifice it for a totally normal monster' seem amazing by comparison. And then...

I'll get this out of the way as quickly as possible. There is, and there can be, no "at the same time". Effects are activated in sequence and resolve in reverse order. Even compulsory effects with the same timing enter a chain. The only way effects resolve simultaneously is if they are part of a singular card effect (I guess there are some exceptions, but Honest sure as hell isn't one of them). So the whole Honest clash, while cute - was inherently very wrong. Here's how it should have gone: first, Sakura declares an attack with Ptolemys. Since noone activates anything, the battle moves to the Damage Step. At that time, Sakura can choose to activate Honest or pass. If she activates Honest, Ptolemys gains ATK equal to Coat of Arms, rising to 5300. Then, it's Yuudai's time to activate Honest or pass. If he activates Honest, Coat of Arms gains ATK equal to the ATK of Ptolemys, which is now 5300, so Coat of Arms' ATK becomes 7900. If Sakura had passed, Yuudai could then choose to activate Honest or pass. If he activated Honest, Coat of Arms would gain ATK equal to Ptolemys, going to 5300. Then, Sakura would get another chance to activate her Honest, and if she did, Ptolemys would rise to 8000. So yeah, the scenario you depicted is impossible. But artistic license is artistic license, and there were worse ways for the duel to resolve, I suppose. But just... the best way, for me, would be to have Yuudai activate Honest, and then Sakura activate her own Honest to win the duel, removing the need for Clarissa's completely unnecessary next turn. All-in-all... everything here, including Sakura not being the one to finish it, and Yuudai being shaken back before the duel ends... was pretty frustrating. Simply because there were readily available, more powerful ways to end it, but it feels like you ignored them.

Well, that's it for my review of 23.1, and as I hopefully clarified, my main beef with it was mostly the ending - everything else was actually pretty cool, and up until the last turns, the duel was one of the better ones of the story, both as far as choreography and characters etc are concerned. However, brace yourself, because winter, or rather, the review of 23.2, is coming, and that one has far more integral issues...

I've already mentioned the term, but this chapter is a prime example of what is affectionately known in fiction as worfing. There are two main plot devices one uses to beef up their character, make them look threatening and amazing, establish them as a grave threat / powerful force of good etc. The first is jobbing - having a random tertiary character appear just for the sake of being crushed to oblivion, effortlessly curbstomped by the character in need of hype. The second is worfing - having a character who is already established as a power player and whom we've spent a considerable amount of time viewing as one of the strongest characters around, fight said character, only to be crushed. Now, yes, there are good and believable ways to pull off either technique, but usually, we have a problem with worfing. Because the easy way to do it is to majorly downplay the character being worfed, in order to further pimp up the one on the dishing side of the ownage. And that's what we have here. There are two ways to do that. The first, and easiest, is to actually make the character worse at what he's supposed to be good at, than what you'd expect him to be. Well, you'll be happy to know that you've sidestepped that completely. Murtagh's game is awesome here, and really just... matches who he is. Murtagh's part of this duel, however short, is probably my favorite part of any duel in the story.

But then, there's the second way... this is trickier. It hits the character themselves, making them overconfident, cocky, seemingly oblivious to things they should be aware of, etc etc - of course, contrasting them to their adversary's unshakeable badassery. This is commonly used when you replace villains with new villains, and this is what happened here. Murtagh just... shouldn't have been like this. God powers or no, this is way too foolishly overconfident compared to him just a couple of hours ago, when he was sending Daiki and Clarissa to scout out the riders, etc. This was a major problem for me here. If Murtagh had been acting more realistically, considering his situation, rather than his overbearing cockiness, it would've given you a chance for more exposition, given him a chance for a more noble ending, and maybe helped Death be a little less ALL THE GENERIC.

Speaking of Death... our major villain's official debut rather... fails to solidly impress us with anything besides his dueling, and his ability to convenietly ignore the presence of Valhalla when he wants to activate Destiny Leo's effect. Murtagh's frustration is pretty easy to understand - for all his role as the final major villain, Death is pretty much just standing there, not giving us any reason to either hate him or sympathize with him. Now you may say "well yeah but he's Death, he's like a force of nature, he's not like a character"... well the problem is, he IS a character, so just explaining his genericness away by "he's Death" isn't working - no matter how you look at it, he's just a guy who has taken on the guise of Death, he's not a personification or embodiment of Death (like Darkness in GX, to give a vague example). So, yeah. At least we should be finding out his identity shortly - there are two plausible possibilities, three if you include my crackpot theory about him. One is good and may yet turn the whole thing into a pretty interesting twist... the second, meh, not so much.

I don't have much to say about Hideo's side of the story except ALL THE AWESOME. Seriously, this was so well-done. Huge props to you for pulling it off so nicely. Junichi especially got the ending he deserved. I expect some conclusion in the next chapter(s) but everything that needed to be done was done. Out of 24's many character arcs and sideplots, this one was, if not my favorite, at the very least the one with the best ending in my view. That is to say, it might not actually end here (Baron is a sneaky dude after all), but the point stands.

So anyway onto the duel. I... don't see why everyone was so shocked at Murtagh's Chaos XYZ Change since... he did it before. In front of all these people. The only difference was that he did it on a Number this time. Like... there was no justification for everyone being shocked. None. They could've all (except Daiki) been surprised about the Chaos Number. But Sakura not being surprised in contrast to the others because she had also Chaos XYZ'd makes no sense. The whole scene just served to remind me how bad the debut of Chaos XYZ was. It seemed like your characters shared my views, and just erased that moment from their memories.

That said, it was kinda cool to see Death use Effect Veiler to stop Big Eye. Kind of a nod to how he got Veilertrolled when he was controlling Unmai. I don't have to say much more about his side of the duel except "Time Machine Gods, cool". Also... come on people. Murtagh is beaten and he just dematerializes. And you call THAT cruel? Hello, this is the guy responsible for instantaneous aging and zombification of random people... in general everyone sympathizes with Murtagh all too much, given who he is and what he's done.

Aaand... we move to what is probably the worst scene in the entire fic. Natsumi being alive... is very disappointing. Her death scene was pretty much the culmination of the last hour and now it's gone. And... Garvan is holding her hostage. To get Daiki to not duel Death. This is just... no. No. Random isn't even beginning to describe this. This was just so much no on so many different levels that it's hard to even believe. Which made Daiki's whole dilemma so damn forced it just wasn't cool any more. I don't know. Just... we're on to the last chapters. There's no excuse at this point for diverting the plot any more. It was the worst possible timing for that kind of thing... well... at the very least I hope it leads somewhere good... because it just stinks of an excuse to keep Daiki out of the final duel. All I have to say about this last part and probably a large part of the last few chapters... original doesn't automatically mean good, and following some tried-and-tested recipes doesn't automatically mean bad. I'd whine and rant about it a little more, but Umbra covered most of what I wanted to say in his last review. And eh. One instance of villainous maniacal laughter per chapter is enough, I'd say.

Eh. So the final battle is 4 on 1... seems pretty chaotic. Sakura being involved in it is just off - her character arc should've ended with Yuudai, but people (looking at you, Garvan) have a tendency to not realize when their role is kinda over lately. It'd be better if you had found an excuse to get Sakura out, and kept Daiki in. I don't know what you were aiming for or thinking was happening but... Daiki was the guy who was the protagonist. You had many mains sure but Daiki was THE guy. Him not being involved in the final duel is an example of original =/= good that I mentioned before. Unless you twist it on its head somehow. But everything has become annoyingly linear since Murtagh's defeat, so I'm not confident about that.

At this point you'd probably think I've complained enough... but you'd be wrong. Because I have one more thing to criticize. The technical quality of your writing... has decreased, dramatically. In the last four chapters or so I've noticed three or four times more misspellings, grammar and syntax errors, and just sloppy writing in general, than usual. I apologize if I'm wrong, but I feel that [i]you yourself[/i], when writing these final chapters, were rather rushed and / or fed up, which resulted in most of the aforementioned issues.

Well, at least you know now why you couldn't get many in-depth comments. It's much easier to write a lot about something that's bad, than something that's good - this review is about probably my least favorite chapter in the fic, and another chapter that even though my general impression was positive, also had a lot of things to criticize, and yet it's ridiculously longer than any other review I've written. Ah well.

I have to establish that, despite all my criticism, I'm still enjoying the finale very much. It's not as good as it could be, sadly, but it's still quite solid and with a lot of strong points (the subtle or not-so-subtle humor during Murtagh's and Death's duel is a good example). I'm kicking myself for deciding not to proofread the final arc, basically - could've, probably, caught onto a lot of these problems and helped alleviate them. Also, knowing you, you're probably saving some really good stuff for the endgame... so even if the build-up is not the best, I'm still looking forward to that.

[Bahamut - Envoy of the End]

*feels terrible and wants to do things to upper limbs that must not be mentioned on a childrens forum*

Right, have left work (starting week's holiday thank god) and had a sleep so feel a bit less terrible than when I initially read these comments. Don't... really know how to honestly respond still, especially since any response that comes to mind right now either sounds whiney or pathetic or full of crap excuses or needlessly dramatic along the lines of "this chapter wasn't loved by everyone, I'm useless and my life is over" etc. Which I kind of half feel, because I hate failing and putting out bad writing, and I kind of half feel... maybe something Saber eluded to. And obviously huge bruises on the ego and the knowledge of being shown up as nothing like the writer I fancy myself as, which smarts like hell. God I hate my mental fragility; any small chip at all and the whole thing shatters.

(Is starting to whine and come across as needlessly dramatic and no-one wants to read it, except for the people who it's going to fuel).

Well, I said I'd reply to every comment... so... *groan*... deep breath.

[quote name='Umbra' timestamp='1352578237' post='6065849']
It's not about confirming their deaths, it's about the impact those death scenes had. You have essentially nullified whatever you were trying to accomplish with "killing" them in that duel, and combined with your otherwise near-perfect record when it comes to keeping the protagonists alive, it's just [i]disappointing.[/i] Expecting more from you, I was.

The thing about this "This was always going to happen" excuse that you keep using is that that's exactly what it is. We the readers do not know everything that's going on in the story, and you the writer has to remember that. Things always have to make [i]sense[/i] to the reader. There's a difference between "this was unknown to us before" and "that came absolutely out of nowhere", and quite frankly, we're seeing more of the latter than of the former. Garvan becomes the tool to get Dai away from the final duel, rather than being "subtle as a hammer" when demonstrating it. It's just bad writing.

What is Garvan desperate about, exactly? Making the fic seem more original? Because that's certainly what I'm getting from your responses.

Oh, and you can [i]always[/i] give a character a personality. Death didn't have to be such a generic villain if you'd designed him differently.
[/quote]

I understand. Miraculous "oh I'm alive after all, after my tear-jerking death" isn't a swerve that's enjoyable.

I've been told the contents of the second paragraph by Saber and others so many times I should have stopped doing it by now, that's why that one really hurts that I'm still doing that.

Agreed again. Still got two chapters to salvage Death, although obviously my confidence is gone completely.

I feel really bad about this because I've badgered you into reading this so much since you dropped off halfway through arc two, and from where you've picked up it just sounds like I've served you a massive let down after all that hype.

Not going to respond to every single part of the next post, because 1 there is a character limit on these posts and 2 you guys can only take so much miserable drivel/excuses without wanting to throw baseball bats at me.

[quote name='~ Epic Hero - Saber ~' timestamp='1352587757' post='6065969']
From the beginning, I had assumed the Apocalypse Knights would be a secondary element, parallel antagonists that cause all sorts of trouble during the course of the main plot, and end up as a threat that requires forces to be diverted in order to be dealt with, as well as tying up loose plot threads and resolving some character arcs. To be the ones to actively seize the main antagonist spot and dominate the scene as the final threat... no, I don't think they were qualified for that as a plot element, and the latest chapter pretty much proves this, in my view at least. They just don't have enough relevance to fill the spot. If you compare this, say, to Fygmorke stepping up after Demon in Armageddon, this falls far short. We had known about Fygmorke - agenda, motivation, character and all - for ages and his development into the final villain had been built up carefully for a while. It doesn't help at all that the Apocalypse group is basically ALL THE GENERIC. Unmai, Vladimir and Yuudai are basically archetypal examples of brainwashed good guys and with the exception of Vladimir follow the typical plot course of such characters to the letter. The plot twist that they were dead to begin with isn't enough to really set them apart especially since it makes no plot difference at all. And if they are generic, I don't even have to get started on Death. I was expecting something at least a bit shocking about him in the last chapter but he was the embodiment of predictability, a walking evil mastermind trope. And unfortunately his bout against Murtagh was nothing more than WORFING ALL THE WORFING - it reminded so much of ZONE vs Aporia it was painful. But I will talk about Death in more detail later, so for now I will shift my focus to the previous chapter.

Anyone who had been paying close attention to the story from the beginning would immediately realize what dead guys coming back to life as evil brainwashed duelists was leading up to, in terms of Sakura's character arc. Surprisingly, or perhaps not so much, we have Clarissa's presence as well. Eventually, it can be said that Clarissa and Sakura are the two characters to be connected to Yuudai, so there should be no complaints there. Clarissa and Sakura have developed some synergy between themselves, and Clarissa is probably my favorite character in the story anyway. All-in-all, we were in for an interesting chapter. The encounter begins as straightforward as it gets. Sakura can't be brought to harm Yuudai, whose twisted mindset is, again, pretty direct and without any surprises. Probably the biggest surprise for me was Yuudai's deck - I had expected the final villain (ergo, Death) to be your Verz user. I liked how Verz connects Yuudai to his Horseman title, but I will complain that Vladimir and Unmai's decks didn't change accordingly to fit.[/quote]

I see.

The Pestilence/Verz thing was just something that happened by accident. I didn't know much about the horseman until the decision to use their imagery and only then found out one was based on disease, just a lucky thing. Noted about the DT thing.

[quote]Now, my opening paragraph and general tone of the review probably betray that these weren't my favorite chapters, overall. Well, rejoice, because there is a certain part in these chapters that stands out majorly. And that is, you guessed it, Hideo's plot thread that surgically interrupts the duel right now. Tarao's plot, Junichi initially playing along with it, Hideo's and Tarao's confrontation, Tarao's reasoning, and his end by Junichi's figurative hand were all just yes. Yeah, we may not have gotten a proper duel out of these guys, but it was never needed, and this was just about the best way it could all be done (in conjunction with the resolution in the next chapter, of course, but all in good time). I wonder if Tarao realized that it was Junichi's monsters that did him in.[/quote]

Least I got a couple of things right. Glad this part succeeded.

I imagine Tarao would have, even if not invested heavily in his son's passion, at least known enough to recognise Poseidra as his monster and realised/guessed that he'd turned on him. He did shout "What are you doing?" or something similar, which is more likely to be aimed at Junichi than a dragon.

[quote]Unfortunately... what has been a very well scripted fight, with an appropriate amount of drama and excitement, so far... has to be marred during its last few turns. Sakura's summoning of Ptolemys is just so... bland, without her even realizing what she's doing, that it actually makes Murtagh's 'HURR DURR LOOK HOW I AWESOMELY SUMMON THIS MONSTER IN A SUPER SPECIAL WAY and then sacrifice it for a totally normal monster' seem amazing by comparison. And then...

I'll get this out of the way as quickly as possible. There is, and there can be, no "at the same time". Effects are activated in sequence and resolve in reverse order. Even compulsory effects with the same timing enter a chain.... But artistic license is artistic license, and there were worse ways for the duel to resolve, I suppose. But just... the best way, for me, would be to have Yuudai activate Honest, and then Sakura activate her own Honest to win the duel, removing the need for Clarissa's completely unnecessary next turn. All-in-all... everything here, including Sakura not being the one to finish it, and Yuudai being shaken back before the duel ends... was pretty frustrating. Simply because there were readily available, more powerful ways to end it, but it feels like you ignored them.

... I hopefully clarified, my main beef with it was mostly the ending - everything else was actually pretty cool, and up until the last turns...[/quote]

I think... and this could be said about a lot of moments in duels this arc, I got so blinded by "double Honest that would be such a cool moment that must happen it will be amazing" that I just didn't consider anything else. Stupid "glory moments" mentality. I didn't like the idea of Sakura finishing him personally and wanted to get Greys in. The hypocrisy of me slating Zexal II for being so god awful with its plot when I'm doing the exact same thing as badly is staggering/disappointing.

[quote]I've already mentioned the term, but this chapter is a prime example of what is affectionately known in fiction as worfing. There are two main plot devices one uses to beef up their character, make them look threatening and amazing, establish them as a grave threat / powerful force of good etc. The first is jobbing - having a random tertiary character appear just for the sake of being crushed to oblivion, effortlessly curbstomped by the character in need of hype. The second is worfing - having a character who is already established as a power player and whom we've spent a considerable amount of time viewing as one of the strongest characters around, fight said character, only to be crushed. Now, yes, there are good and believable ways to pull off either technique, but usually, we have a problem with worfing. Because the easy way to do it is to majorly downplay the character being worfed, in order to further pimp up the one on the dishing side of the ownage. And that's what we have here. There are two ways to do that. The first, and easiest, is to actually make the character worse at what he's supposed to be good at, than what you'd expect him to be. Well, you'll be happy to know that you've sidestepped that completely. Murtagh's game is awesome here, and really just... matches who he is. Murtagh's part of this duel, however short, is probably my favorite part of any duel in the story.

But then, there's the second way... this is trickier. It hits the character themselves, making them overconfident, cocky, seemingly oblivious to things they should be aware of, etc etc - of course, contrasting them to their adversary's unshakeable badassery. This is commonly used when you replace villains with new villains, and this is what happened here. Murtagh just... shouldn't have been like this. God powers or no, this is way too foolishly overconfident compared to him just a couple of hours ago, when he was sending Daiki and Clarissa to scout out the riders, etc. This was a major problem for me here. If Murtagh had been acting more realistically, considering his situation, rather than his overbearing cockiness, it would've given you a chance for more exposition, given him a chance for a more noble ending, and maybe helped Death be a little less ALL THE GENERIC.[/quote]

I see...

Sorry some of my responses are just going to be that because I'm kinda at a loss for words. I didn't want to just not say anything and look like I'm ignoring critisism. I'm just kinda shrinking with my head bowed at the minute.

[quote]Speaking of Death... our major villain's official debut rather... fails to solidly impress us with anything besides his dueling, and his ability to convenietly ignore the presence of Valhalla when he wants to activate Destiny Leo's effect. Murtagh's frustration is pretty easy to understand - for all his role as the final major villain, Death is pretty much just standing there, not giving us any reason to either hate him or sympathize with him. Now you may say "well yeah but he's Death, he's like a force of nature, he's not like a character"... well the problem is, he IS a character, so just explaining his genericness away by "he's Death" isn't working - no matter how you look at it, he's just a guy who has taken on the guise of Death, he's not a personification or embodiment of Death (like Darkness in GX, to give a vague example). So, yeah. At least we should be finding out his identity shortly - there are two plausible possibilities, three if you include my crackpot theory about him. One is good and may yet turn the whole thing into a pretty interesting twist... the second, meh, not so much.[/quote]

....

.... I completely forgot about Valhalla...

*hits self in face with a hammer for that*

It was a crap non-excuse. Sorry.

[quote]So anyway onto the duel. I... don't see why everyone was so shocked at Murtagh's Chaos XYZ Change since... he did it before. In front of all these people. The only difference was that he did it on a Number this time. Like... there was no justification for everyone being shocked. None. They could've all (except Daiki) been surprised about the Chaos Number. But Sakura not being surprised in contrast to the others because she had also Chaos XYZ'd makes no sense. The whole scene just served to remind me how bad the debut of Chaos XYZ was. It seemed like your characters shared my views, and just erased that moment from their memories.

That said, it was kinda cool to see Death use Effect Veiler to stop Big Eye. Kind of a nod to how he got Veilertrolled when he was controlling Unmai. I don't have to say much more about his side of the duel except "Time Machine Gods, cool". Also... come on people. Murtagh is beaten and he just dematerializes. And you call THAT cruel? Hello, this is the guy responsible for instantaneous aging and zombification of random people... in general everyone sympathizes with Murtagh all too much, given who he is and what he's done.[/quote]

The surprise was supposed to be at Chaos Number and not the summon. I've just f***ed it up in writing it.

Agreed.

[quote]Aaand... we move to what is probably the worst scene in the entire fic. Natsumi being alive... is very disappointing. Her death scene was pretty much the culmination of the last hour and now it's gone. And... Garvan is holding her hostage. To get Daiki to not duel Death. This is just... no. No. Random isn't even beginning to describe this. This was just so much no on so many different levels that it's hard to even believe. Which made Daiki's whole dilemma so damn forced it just wasn't cool any more. I don't know. Just... we're on to the last chapters. There's no excuse at this point for diverting the plot any more. It was the worst possible timing for that kind of thing... well... at the very least I hope it leads somewhere good... because it just stinks of an excuse to keep Daiki out of the final duel. All I have to say about this last part and probably a large part of the last few chapters... original doesn't automatically mean good, and following some tried-and-tested recipes doesn't automatically mean bad. I'd whine and rant about it a little more, but Umbra covered most of what I wanted to say in his last review.

Eh. So the final battle is 4 on 1... seems pretty chaotic. Sakura being involved in it is just off - her character arc should've ended with Yuudai, but people (looking at you, Garvan) have a tendency to not realize when their role is kinda over lately. It'd be better if you had found an excuse to get Sakura out, and kept Daiki in. I don't know what you were aiming for or thinking was happening but... Daiki was the guy who was the protagonist. You had many mains sure but Daiki was THE guy. Him not being involved in the final duel is an example of original =/= good that I mentioned before. Unless you twist it on its head somehow. But everything has become annoyingly linear since Murtagh's defeat, so I'm not confident about that.[/quote]

.... *looks ashamed*

Well I don't want to write a load of "but... but... but crap excuse" again since I've got nothing but, so, sorry I'm just struggling to respond. Just... read it, see your point, completely agree with it, feel s***. Only thing I've got is I still just really didn't want Dai in this duel at all, I wanted to do something else with him and have the others have the fight against Death. Because (crap excuse time) if Dai was involved against Death along with X and Y, well how is it going to end up? In the same way that every handicap match involving Yugi/Jaden/Yusei/Yuma ended up. With X and Y being battered/defeated before lead does something dues ex machina for the win. Unless Dai suddenly ended up in the X/Y role and was defeated and someone else bought it home. That might have been a cool idea and got away from the predictable in a better way. Hopefully Kaneko/Sakura/Jin/Clarissa would be less predictable (but it probably already isn't).

The only other crap justification I'm going to make is about Sakura's involvement. This guy did turn her boyfriend into a deranged mass murdering intenting demon, she's got more reason to be involved than certainly say Jin or even Clarissa and Kaneko on a personal level, rather than just world saving and 'they are the mains she should make way for them'. People have gone on about Sakura not doing enough in this story, now she's doing something. Unlike every other female in YGO's history, I'm not just having her cheerlead.

[quote]At this point you'd probably think I've complained enough... but you'd be wrong. Because I have one more thing to criticize. The technical quality of your writing... has decreased, dramatically. In the last four chapters or so I've noticed three or four times more misspellings, grammar and syntax errors, and just sloppy writing in general, than usual. I apologize if I'm wrong, but I feel that [i]you yourself[/i], when writing these final chapters, were rather rushed and / or fed up, which resulted in most of the aforementioned issues.

Well, at least you know now why you couldn't get many in-depth comments. It's much easier to write a lot about something that's bad, than something that's good - this review is about probably my least favorite chapter in the fic, and another chapter that even though my general impression was positive, also had a lot of things to criticize, and yet it's ridiculously longer than any other review I've written. Ah well.[/quote]

This is the part that really worries me. The stuff before is all opinions on ideas, the story works for some and not others, but writing technique and basic spelling/grammar is sort of more undeniable facts (if you see what I mean. Maybe not). But it's an observation that... that's deeply concerning.

... I can't honestly say you are wrong.

It's human nature, I know this. But major critisism was needed and hasn't been dealt out enough throughout this story before this arc, hence inflated opinion of ability, and if its genuinely that god awful I'd rather I was told rather than not (can't believe I just said that given how I've harped on about feeling terrible now. I really do). But yeah, best not to let me go on writing s*** and thinking 'I am so great everything I write is awesome' without pulling me up and giving me solid critisism because you and Umbra are right in everything that's been said here, can't argue with much of it at all.

[quote]I have to establish that, despite all my criticism, I'm still enjoying the finale very much. It's not as good as it could be, sadly, but it's still quite solid and with a lot of strong points (the subtle or not-so-subtle humor during Murtagh's and Death's duel is a good example). I'm kicking myself for deciding not to proofread the final arc, basically - could've, probably, caught onto a lot of these problems and helped alleviate them. Also, knowing you, you're probably saving some really good stuff for the endgame... so even if the build-up is not the best, I'm still looking forward to that.
[/quote]

No Dion. You have more important and better things to do (I know from your exciting exersions in PMs) than invest so heavily in this when, let's be honest, how many times have I took your advice and changed things? Genuinely changed things? Honestly? Piotr is still alive having not commited suicide first arc, and... well I can't think of anything else, dunno if you can. The same would probably have applied here and that would have just insulted you and wasted your time. I don't mean to rant... I dunno what I'm typing anymore, just don't beat yourself up about not betaing. I've made a royal pig sty of it on my own.

Now I've got two chapters to haul it out and provide something better in the big finale.......

..... we're doomed.

I dunno anymore, maybe it'll turn out alright. Sorry I'm just completely knocked out of it after that torrid over was deservedly swatted for 36 (cricket metaphor, not sure whether that's cool or not) and no matter what I'm going to feel bad about it now (which is not a helpful state of mind to go and make a sudden raft of changes to it all in). And like you said, I don't think I've got it in me to want to do that. So... I guess I'll keep it as is and fingers crossed.

.... can't believe I just typed fingers crossed about the big finale. That's confidence inspiring.

Chapter will be up on Tuesday (if anyone is still reading after this). Sorry for ranting and being miserable, I do thank you for taking your time to comment and analyize and provide wisdom to make me better. But... yeah...

[Aerion Brightflame]

The thing is though dude, even though you made mistakes, and it wasn't the greatest chapter you could have written, thats part of the expierience. Writing is you creating your own world that is unique to you. You should never try and please everyone with it, becuase doing so means it isn't your world. The double Honest thing, whilst slightly tacky, and not working in the actually rules, I can still see why you did it. I'm sure Umbra and Saber have written things that got lots of negative feedback, and they have moved on and helped to make it better. And you an't aspire to perfection without taking nocks along the way, becuase nothing worth having comes easy in life.

And no matter if this chapter was relatively bad, throughout this fic you have still written things that are awe inspiring, and that I doubt many other people could have written anything like that. Maybe bits of it were rough around the edges, but if it were perfect, you'd now be wondering why no one was commenting, so its a double edged sword.

Please don't beat yourself up dude. Everyone ends up feeling like that at some point or another. You are still a great writer, and I have every confidence that you are going to give this a great ending. Again, if you feel like ranting, then I'm open for it.

And I for one look forward to the new chapter. And I'm sure everyone else who has read this fic, and continues to do so feels the same.

[Umbra]

Don't beat yourself up too hard. Nobody's perfect, myself certainly included. A few years back, I posted the first chapter of one of my fanfics to another YGO site, and it got completely ripped to shreds. Not gonna lie, I cried over that. Then, I took it to heart, and tried to fix the problems. I learned what I was bad at, what I'd been doing wrong, and did my best to become better at it. Without that terrible review back in the day, I would probably be way, way worse today than I am now. It's all about focusing on the present. Past mistakes are past mistakes; learn from them, but don't dwell on them.

As for the endgame, I'm still excited. You've proven time and time again that you are among the best writers this site can offer, and even if you stumble a little on the last few steps, that doesn't mean you won't finish the race. You can still do this. From what I've read of yours in the past, I know you know how to end a story, which is more than I can say about a lot of other writers. Aside from the chronic-backstabbing-disorder that is Garvan and Murtagh's trainwreck, you write some of the best characters I've seen on this site, and I'm sure you have more than a few aces up your sleeve left for the remaining chapters.

Keep going, man. I know you have it in you.

[Brinolovania]

I agree with Barthandelus and Umbra totally. Yes, this one chapter was subpar. This one chapter. Out of the forty-six chapters posted for this fic, this one is the only one that had major writing issues. One bad chapter doesn't ruin a story. Right now, I'm reading a series called Furies of Calderon. I've just read the fifth book, and it had a lot more mistakes than the others. There were several grammatical errors, an instance where the author actually wrote the wrong character name in, and a giganticly obvious deux ex machina at the end. And as it turns out, I enjoyed the book, and I'm already trying to get the next one.

My point is that I plan to do the same thing here. You are a great writer. You've written, so far, 45 chapters of awesome and this one not so awesome one. That's a pretty good ratio. I (and I'm certain I speak for a bunch of others when I say this) am going to read the last two chapters of Yugioh 24, and I am going to enjoy them greatly. I know that because you're writing them.

( On a side note, typing on an iPod takes forever. I've been sitting here for like 20 minutes)

[Vector Nightmare]

Let me put things into perspective here.

Assume a published writer finishes the first or second draft of his novel. It has probably taken months if not years of hard work and extreme dedication. It has take a lot, and I mean A LOT, of going back and rewriting, painstakingly struggling over the tiniest details, to get that draft done. He's happy, he's proud of it. So he sends it in for editing. You know what he gets back?

A huge wall of red. Every line has another line of corrections underneath. Every chapter has a follow-up of notes as big as the chapter itself. And that's if the story is good enough. Fifty percent of the time? He'll just get back a big fat NOTHING, as his precious script was tossed straight into the trash can.

You're taking my criticism badly? This level of criticism is like the song of angels to just about anyone out there who's published a book or two, compared to what they usually get off their first, second or even third drafts. You think you're a bad writer because of this? Then every single published author must be awful. You think you're doing badly? When this is essentially your first draft? That's beyond arrogant.

After writing a whole story like Armageddon and nearly finishing your second one, do you really still cling to the notion that writing is a painless, straightforward procedure? The world of writing isn't black-and-white. It's not a straight lane of improvement from the beginning to the end. It has thousands of ups-and-downs. The best writer in the world may sit down and write something that is complete garbage, and then the next day produce the month's top bestseller. No, being a good writer doesn't mean that everything you write is good, and writing good things doesn't mean you are a good writer.

Half of the books out there, even best-selling books, started out as scribbles not much better, if at all, than what you have here. They went through revisions upon revisions, harsh editing and had their authors virtually cry over their manuscripts as they tried to turn what felt like pieces of garbage into legitimate work. It's sad. It's cruel. It's the magical, magical world of writing.

Get a grip, please. I don't know what idea you had of yourself that I apparently shot down, but if you were much better than you already are, you'd be making money off writing. Complaining and feeling down is a natural part of being a writer. But do it about the right things. You have no right to whine about this level of criticism. You should feel happy, because the fact that people are invested enough in your story to criticize it like this means you're already very far into the road of success.

[Synchronized]

Mate, I'm gonna level with ya. If I can make it through fifteen brutally awful Chapters that comprised D-Accel's entire first arc, and [i]still [/i]have readers the likes of Umbra 30 chapters later, you can make it through one Chapter that was slightly sub-par.

I can't put it much more simple than that, and I'm the least confident person I know. You're a fantastic writer and one (not even bad) Chapter shouldn't discourage you. If anything, it should inspire you to try just that little bit harder to really make the finale pack one heck of a punch.

[Reinforce]

I probably should have posted before now since I read the chapter pretty well the day it was released, but I don't exactly have much to say that hasn't been said already, and I've been kinda lazy over the last few days. The new chapter, while still decent, wasn't quite as good as the standard we've seen till now. Garvin seems to almost be changing allegiances every few minutes, but at least Natsumi is still alive. Daiki being taken out of the final fight was not something I saw coming, but the 4v1 against Death seems almost like it's gonna be a bit overcrowded and prevent most of them from doing too much towards fighting. Metaion appearing was something I enjoyed quite a lot, being as he's both a nearly invincible monster and one of my fav cards, but to just have the duel end and Murtagh taken down that easily was kinda meh, not that great of a conclusion for Murtagh. I kind of like the symbology of fairies being the deck for Death, being as the faries you seem to be using are mostly angels, which is interesting in general, since there is quite a strong connection behind angels and the horseman of the apocalypse. Overall it was still enjoyable, though bits felt kinda meh, but I'm the type to just read the story and not really criticize it much, so most of these things I noticed because of the others criticisms. Besides, I'm used to rants both on here and offline, so you ranting at us doesn't really worry me much.