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YuGiOh! Trinity


Suzogamori Ren

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[spoiler=Episode 1: The Shining Soul]
“Ah! Nothing beats going out and playing Duel Monsters on a Saturday morning!”
[url=http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc235/setojim/VincentBrose.png]Vincent Brose’[/url] is a 20 year-old duelist who lives in Liaf Town, Japan. He has blue eyes, blonde hair that reaches down to his elbows, and a very laid back personality. It’s Saturday, which means its time for a Duel Monsters tournament at the Duel Monsters Arcade. Vincent is on his way to meet up with his best friend, [url=http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc235/setojim/KorinFaerie.png]Korin Faerie[/url].
*Knock* *Knock*
“Hey!” Korin said. “Lemme go get my gear and we’ll get going.”
“Gotcha,” Vincent replied.
About two minutes passed and then Korin emerged from the door. Then, they were on their way. Neither of the two drove a car so had to walk.
“So who do you think is gonna show up this week?” Korin asked.
“I don’t know. I’m hoping to have a challenge this week,” proclaimed Vincent. “By the way, you should see what I got last night.”
“What is it?” asked the curious Korin.
“You’ll see when we get to the arcade. I don’t feel like being late,” answered Vincent.
“Okay. Fair enough. But what did you mean when you said that you want a challenge this week? You’ve never made it passed the first round at the arcade.”
“Remember when I said that I got something last night?” Vincent remarked. “It’s going to help me win the whole thing.”
“You’re barely a match for me as it is. I doubt whatever you got last night is gonna help you win a duel, let alone the whole tournament.”
“Trust me. The bad duelist that you thought I was is no more. I’ve been reborn. You’ll see,” Vincent said confidently.
“Alright. I’ll believe you for now,” Korin then turned his head. “Well, we’re here.”
The Duel Monsters Arcade is a large, blue building with a large “DMA” on the top. The two friends walked though the automatic doors.
“Wow! We have a huge crowd today,” said Vincent.
“Well, well, well; look who it is,” said a voice from the crowd.
“Rona,” Vincent said in one word.
“So, are you ready to get your amateur butt kicked again this week by yours truly?” said Rona in an obnoxiously snobby way.
“Heh. We’ll see who beats who this week, Rona,” countered Vincent confidently.
“Hey! Hey! Wait guys! Save all the dueling for the tournament. It just so happens that the two of you are in the first match,” said the tournament official.
“REALLY!?” said Rona and Vincent.
“Yep. In fact, the match begins in the next 2 minutes. How about we go ahead and begin, since you’re both fired up to duel each other.”
“Alright,” said Vincent.
“Wanna lose quickly, eh? Fine. Let’s do this!” Rona said.
Both of the pumped up duelists walked up on to the arena.
“Trust me, Rona. This time, I’ll be the one to come out on top.” Vincent confidently challenged.
“Well then, punk. Bring it!”
The two of them activated their duel disks and drew their opening hands. Their Life Point meters set themselves to 4000.
“Since you’re so confident you’re going to beat me again, you can start,” Rona said.
“Very well. I draw! (6) I place 1 card face-down and end my turn (5).”
“That’s all? For someone so confident in his victory, that isn’t much of a move. You have no monsters to protect yourself. I draw! (6) I summon Vorse Raider (4/1900/1200) in attack mode! (5) Now, show Vincent why it’s a bad idea to leave himself wide open!”
“Heh. Predictable,” said Vincent. “You activated Dimensional Prison. This card takes one attacking monster and traps it in the different dimension.”
Rona’s Vorse Raider disappeared in a vortex in the sky.
“No way!” said Rona surprised. “I can’t believe I fell into such an obvious trap. But I didn’t think you had a good card like that in your deck.”
“I guess that’s what you get for being so over-confident,” said Vincent.
“Whatever. Your move.” Said Rona.
“Alright. I draw. (6) I activate Starburst. (5) By giving up 1000 Life Points, I can Summon a “Star” Tuner monster from my deck, like Sacred Star (1/100/100). Next, I can Special Summon Knight of the Stars (3/1300/1000) from my hand since I control a Tuner monster. (4) Oh and by the way, I have 2. (3) Next, I think I’ll give my 2 knights a tune up by combining them with my Sacred Star. When the light of the Sacred Star shines upon the weak, it brings life to a new hope. I Synchro Summon Sacred Warlord (7/2450/2000)!”
“ASynchro Monster!?” Rona said. “You never used Synchro Monsters!”
“Maybe because before yesterday, I was a naïve duelist. Since then, my entire game changed. Now then, back to the duel. I activate Sacred Warlord’s ability. Now I can look at my top 3 cards and add 1 of them to my hand. Then, I remove the other two from play. (4) Now, Sacred Warlord, attack Rona’s Life Points direcrtly!”
Vincent’s monster ran at Rona and slashed him with its immensely large sword, then fell back. Rona’s Life Points dropped to 1550.
“Now, I’ll place 1 card face-down and end my turn. (3)” said Vincent.
“How did he become so good?” Rona asked himself. “Just last week, he was the worst duelist that attended the arcade. But now, he’s making me look like a novice.” Rona then turned to Vincent, “How did you become so good in only a mere week?”
“It’s funny you ask that. Up until last night, I was still the same, weak duelist. But last night at about 9:00PM, a strange man came to my door and gave me a card. It was an incredibly powerful card, but that’s not what changed me. When I touched the card, I felt like my soul had been reborn. That’s what has made me a better duelist.”
“That’s gotta be the lamest story I’ve ever heard. I’ll show you what a real duelist can do. I draw. (6) I play Fiend’s Sanctuary to Summon a Metal Fiend Token (1/0/0). (5) Then, I’ll sacrifice it to Summon Minoan Centaur (6/1800/1000). (4) Next, I activate his ability to sacrifice himself to Summon 2 Level 4 Beast-Warriors from my deck in attack mode. So I Summon a Vorse Raider (4/1900/1200) and Gene-Warped Warwolf (4/2000/100). Last, I’ll activate Solidarity. (3) This card enhances the ATK of all my Beast-Warriors by 800 points so long as Beast-Warriors are the only monsters in my Graveyard. Now, Gene-Warped Warwolf attack his monster!”
Vincent’s monster blew up in pixels and his Life Points became 3650.
“Now, Vorse Raider, attack him directly!”
“No!” said Korin. “This attack will wipe out most of Vincent’s Life Points.”
The Vorse Raider’s attack went for Vincent, but hit Sacred Star instead.
“What the?” said Rona with much expression.
“When Sacred Warlord is destroyed, the Tuner monster used in its summoning is returned to the field in Defense mode.
“Fine. You lose next turn anyway. Your move,” said Rona furiously.
You lose on this turn. I draw. (4) Open face-down card, Call of the Haunted. This lets me revive my fallen Sacred Warlord. Then, I activate Sacred Soul Saber. This card increases the ATK of my warlord by 800 (7/3250/2000). Next, I activate Daggers of Demise. This card lets my level 7 or higher Synchro Monster attack for every monster in my Graveyard, up to 3 attacks, in addition to its original attack. Warlord, destroy Vorse Raider, then Gene-Warped Warwolf.”
Vincent’s attacks destroy both of Rona’s monsters and dropped Rona’s Life Points down to 450.
“Finally, Sacred Warlord, finish him off.”
Sacred Warlord’s attack slashed Rona and his Life Points fell to 0, and Rona fell to his knees.
“No way! How could I lose to him.” Said Rona.
“You won! Good job, Vincent.” Korin said.
“And this duel is just the beginning. I plan to win every duel I play from here on.”

~fin

New Original-only cards used:


Sacred Warlord
7
Light
Warrior/Synchro/Effect
2450
2000
"Sacred Star" + 1 or more non-Tuner monsters
Once per turn, you can look at the top 3 cards of your deck. Add 1 of them to your hand, then remove the other 2 from play. When this card is destroyed in battle and sent to the Graveyard, Special Summon the Tuner that was used in the Summoning of this card.

Knight of the Stars
3
Light
Warrior/Effect
1300
1000
If you control a Tuner monster, you can Special Summon this card from your hand.

Sacred Star
1
Light
Rock/Tuner
100
100
When this card is Normal Summoned, you can send 2 "Sacred Star" from your deck to the Graveyard and Special Summon 1 "Winged Crucible" from your deck. This card can only be used in the Synchro Summon of a "Sacred" monster.

Daggers of Demise
Spell Card
Select 1 Level 7 or higher Synchro monster you control. During this turn, the selected monster gains 1 additional attack for each monster in your graveyard (Max. 3).

Sacred Soul Saber
Equip Spell Card
The equipped monster gains 800 ATK. You can remove from play 1 "Sacred" monster in your Graveyard to add this card from your Graveyard to your hand.

Starburst
Spell Card
Pay 1000 Life Points. Special Summon 1 "Star" tuner monster from your deck. It cannot be used as a tribute in a tribute summon and it is removed from play during the End Phase.
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Episode 2: Entity of Light Revealed! Take Flight, Sacred Star Dragon!]

“Yes! He won the match!” yelled Korin out of excitement. “Great job, Vince!”
“Eh. It was nothing,” commented Vincent. “That guy was out of control. He couldn’t beat me now, even if he had a million chances.”
“Hey!” yelled Rona. “Don’t think just ‘cause you beat me you can go right ahead and win the tournament. You still have quite a few good duelists to beat, let alone the Arcade Champion, [url=http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc235/setojim/ArturoTetsuma.png]Arturo Tetsuma[/url].”
“Hey, he’s right, Vincent,” said Korin. “Let’s not forget who we’re dealing with. Arturo has been the Arcade Champion for the past two years.”
“Oh yeah?” asked Vincent. “Well his winning streak is ending today.”
“We’ll see, Vincent. I have a duel to win,” Korin pronounced. “I’ll see you in a few.”
“Alright. Good luck,” wished Vincent.
All the duelists got on with their duels. Duelists were eliminated left and right. Soon after countless hours, only 8 duelists remained, those of which include Korin, Vincent, and, the champion, Arturo.
“You’ve made it quite far, Vincent,” Arturo said. “But you will not beat my two year winning streak.”
“We’ll see,” retaliated Vincent.
“Attention duelists,” the Tournament Official announced. “The pairings for the top eight is posted! Go find your opponents and prepare to duel.”
The top eight duelists ran to pairings screen. It appeared that Korin was dueling against Arturo, and Vincent was dueling a duelist named Oria Nothan. He’s a duelist that’s well known in these parts, however his deck is always different every tournament, and it’s unclear what deck he’s using this time.
“Now that the opponent’s have met, its time to begin,” announced the official. “Duelists begin your duels!”
“Let’s Duel!” yelled all 8 finalists.
“I’ll start (6),” demanded Oria. “I set 3 cards face-down (3). Then, I’ll summon Emissary of the Afterlife (4/1600/600) in defense mode (2). Your move, Vincent.”
“Thanks. I draw (6),” moved Vincent. He then began to think to himself, “He played a pretty prepared field for something. I better be cautious.” He then moved to Oria. “I Summon Sacred Knight (4/1800/1200) in attack mode (5). Now, attack his Emissary of the Afterlife with Proving Valiance!”
“Ha! I knew you’d do that,” proclaimed Oria. “Your attack has triggered my trap card! Reveal Generation Shift! This card lets me destroy Emissary of the Afterlife, then I add another to my hand (3). Also, I get to add a level 3 or lower Normal Monster to my hand.”
“A Normal Monster?” Vincent asked curiously. “What could you possibly do with-” Vincent stopped. His face looked like he’s seen a ghost. “It couldn’t be.”
“Oh, but it can. I add the Right Leg of the Forbidden One to my hand (4),” played Oria.
“Exodia? I wasn’t expecting that,” Vincent said. “But destroying your monster before my attack declaration was complete allows a replay of my attack. Which means: I attack you directly with Sacred Knight!”
Vincent’s Knight slashed Oria with no mercy. His Life Point meter dropped to 2200.
Vincent ended his turn with, “I set a card face-down and end my turn (4).”
“I draw (5),” Oria declared. He then turned to Vincent. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost. But how can I blame you? When you’re staring down a deck that holds the strongest card set in Duel Monsters, it’s natural to be scared. Now, try this on for size: I summon Emissary of the Afterlife (4/1600/600) in defense mode (4), and that ends my turn.”
“I draw (5). I play Pot of Duality (4). This card lets me reveal the top 3 cards of my deck. Then, I add one of them to my hand, and return the other two to my deck. So I think I’ll pick Sacred Lancer (4/1800/1000) (5). Next, I think I’ll Summon it in attack mode (4). Sacred Lancer, attack his monster with sacred lance attack!”
Vincent’s lancer then drove its lance into Oria’s Emissary. Then, his emissary blew up in pixels.
“Your monster may have been in defense mode, but thanks to my Lancer’s effect – you lose Life Points equal to the difference between your monster’s DEF and my monsters ATK – which means your Life Points drop to a mere 1000.”
“Maybe so, but destroying Emissary of the Afterlife allows me to add the Left Arm of the Forbidden One to my hand (5),” declared Oria.
Vincent then thought to himself, “The Left Arm? It maybe just a hunch, but why would he pick the Left Arm after adding the Right Leg to his hand? Could it be he has the Left Leg and/or the Right Arm already?” Vincent then asked. “Tell me, could you have added that one because you already have the Left Leg and/or the Right Arm in your hand?”
Oria with a surprised look said, “Haha. How very perceptive you are. I’ll admit to having the other 2 pieces in my hand at the moment.”
Vincent then thought to himself with fear, “If that’s true, then I only have a few turns at most to win before the legendary puzzle of Exodia is completed, so I’d better finish this now.” He then started to talk again.
“Sacred Knight, finish him off with Proving Valiance!”
Vincent’s monster dashed at Oria.
“Not so fast. Open face-down card: Last Blast!” declared Oria
“Oh no!” announced Vincent in terror.
“Afraid so, Vince. This card can only activate if I have 1000 or less Life Points. Now by paying half of them (bringing his Life Point meter down to 500), every card on the field is destroyed.”
A giant burst came from Oria’s card and engulfed all cards in play and blew them up.
“This isn’t good. I end my turn.”
“I draw (6),” Oria called.
Vincent had a look of fear on his face that was quite apparent to all. “Let’s hope that’s not the final piece.”
“Hmm you’re lucky,” Oria said. “I play 2 cards face-down (4) and end my turn.”
“Phew,” said Vincent relieved. “I draw (6).” Vincent then noticed the card in his right hand. He then said in his thoughts, “Perfect! This is just what I was waiting for.” Vincent then turned to Oria. “I reveal my first face-down card: Call of the Haunted! This card allows me to revive my Sacred Knight in attack mode (4/1800/1200). Then, I activate Starburst. By paying 1000 Life Points (This bringing his Life Points to 3000), I can Special Summon Sacred Star (1/100/100). Now, I reveal Gambling Crossroads. With this, I can roll 2 6-sided dice and change the level of my Sacred Star to the total number rolled.”
The dice flew out of the card and fell on the ground. The first die had the number 3 on it. The second die had the number 1 on it.
“Hmm. Not normally a good roll, but, in this situation, it is just perfect. With those rolls, the level of my Sacred Star becomes 4; with that, I tune my Sacred Star to my Sacred Knight. When the light of the Sacred Star shines upon the hearts of those pure, a true entity is born. Light of hope appear! Synchro Summon! Take Flight, Sacred Star Dragon (8/2800/2700)!
A majestic red dragon appeared out of sparkles. All the duelists watching gazed at its magnificence.
“So you are the duelist who holds this legendary creature!” remarked Oria.
“Yes I am, and behold its absolute magnificence. Sacred Star Dragon, attack his Life Points directly! Sacred Inferno!”
“I activate my face-down card! Reveal Final Miracle! When my Life Points are 1000 or less, I can negate your attack and place any monster from my deck on the top, which will obviously be the final piece of –“
“Stop right there! I activate Sacred Star Dragon’s ability. I can negate your card’s effect and remove it from play. Also, my dragon will go with it until the next Standby Phase.”
“Not too bad, but luckily I have my second Final Miracle. Now, I can place the final piece of Exodia on the top of my deck.”
Everyone watching started to gasp.
“Don’t count me out yet, everyone,” Vincent called out to the crowd. “I activate this from my hand: Sneak Attack of the Star Dragons! This spell card allows me to return my dragon to the field for this turn; so without further ado, Sacred Star Dragon return (8/2800/2700)!”
“This can’t be,” cried Oria.
“Oh, but it can. Sacred Star Dragon, finish this! Sacred Inferno!”
Vincent’s beast shot a giant flare out and engulfed Oria completely. After the blaze subsided, Oria fell to his knees; his Life Points dropped to 0. Vincent then smiled.
“Excellent match. You had me goin’ there, Oria.”
Oria got back up and said, “Thank you. I just didn’t expect you to have such an excellent combo planned.”
“Yeah. It was nothing,” Vincent laughed. Just then, a yell came from Korin’s duel. Vincent ran to the duel to see Korin on the ground, his clothes shredded, and his body severely injured.
“What happened?!” Vincent asked with great worry.
Korin tried to speak and managed to muffle out a few words. “It was Arturo. He..is..rutheless. Argh!”
“Korin! Easy.” Said Vincent very concerned.
“Too bad,” Arturo said coming towards them. “He should have heeded my warning.”
Just then, a flashback started.
“I warn you, Korin. I have special powers, and they have been acting very peculiar today. You might want to step down and avoid any danger.”
“Ha! You’re not getting out of this one, Arturo. Today is the day I finally beat you!” challenged Korin.
“You can’t say I didn’t warn you,” said Arturo.
The flashback ended.
“He didn’t heed my warning and fell victim to my powers,” Arturo explained.
“You’re..a..monster,” Korin said in pain.
“Shush, Korin. You need to rest,” commanded Vincent, lightly. He then turned to Arturo. “I don’t know if you injured Korin on purpose or not, but I will beat you to avenge my friend.”
“Is that a threat, Mr. Brose’?” Arturo asked.
“No. That’s a promise,” countered Vincent.
~fin

New Original-only cards used:

Sacred Lancer
4
Light
Warrior/Effect
1800
1000
This card inflicts piercing damage.

Sacred Star Dragon
8
Light
Dragon/Synchro/Effect
2800
2700
"Sacred Star" + 1 or more non-Tuner monster(s)
When a Spell, Trap, or Monster card is activated, you can negate the activation and effect of it, and remove it and this card from play. This card returns to the field during the next Standby Phase.

Gambling Crossroads
Spell Card
Reveal 1 monster in your hand OR select 1 face-up monster you control; roll 2 6-sided dice. Change the level of the revealed monster to the total of the 2 dice until the End Phase.

Last Blast
Trap Card
Activate by paying half your Life Points when you have 1000 or less. Destroy all cards on the field. Only 1 "Last Blast" can be activated by each player per duel.

Final Miracle
Trap Card
Activate only when you have 1000 or less Life Points and when your opponent declares an attack. Negate the attack. Then, place 1 monster from your deck on the top.
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Episode 3: Strive for Perfection]
Episode 3: Strive for Perfection
“I don’t know why you used your powers to hurt my best friend,” roared Vincent. He then noticed something weird about Arturo. Vincent then fell into thought. “What is that?”
A dark glow surrounded Arturo.
“Some kind of dark aura is surrounding him. Could he possess a dark gift, or perhaps a dark curse?”
Just then, Arturo started to yell out in agony. “AAAARGH!” He fell to his knees still screaming. Suddenly, the screaming subsided and Arturo rose to his feet.
“Are you alright, Arturo?” Vincent asked concerned.
“You pathetic mortal,” said Arturo in a mesmerized-type voice. “You will fall before my hand. Then, your powers will be mine.”
“Powers?” asked Vincent. “What on earth are you talking about?”
“That beast you have in your deck - Sacred Star Dragon - it has incredible powers with in it, and once it belongs to me, its unstoppable powers will be at my disposal to do with as I will.”
“Having incredible powers makes it even more important that it not fall into your hands, Arturo,” Vincent countered.
“Arturo? He is only a vessel in which hosts my spirit. I am the ancient spirit of a warlock named Thanatos. The necklace around Arturo’s neck holds my spirit, but I can only come out for a limited time. But once I have your Sacred Star Dragon’s power, I will have the power to manifest my spirit into pure, physical form. But for now, I’ll continue to push Arturo to win his next duel. I intend to see you in the finals. Until then, best of luck. Muahahahaha!” Arturo’s dark aura then faded.
Vincent looked terrified. “I’ve never felt a power like that before. The pressure from him was almost overwhelming. I need to try and force Thanatos out of Arturo’s body. But I cannot do that unless I can get rid of the neckless, which is probably untouchable; Thantos would see to that. The only way I can think to get rid of him is to defeat him in the finals.”
“Alright, finalists, the semi-finals will be paired up like so: Arturo Tetsuma will face off against Vashi Shisuke, and Vincent Brose’ will face off against [url=http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc235/setojim/NaomiGreen.png]Naomi Green[/url]. Find your opponents and begin!”
“My opponent’s a girl?” asked Vincent surprised.
“Yes it is,” answered a voice coming from beside Vincent. “Huh?” Vincent turned to see his opponent: Naomi Green.
Naomi Green is a very beautiful and tall lady with long, blonde hair and blue eyes, with a slender body type.
“Sorry,” said Vincent blushing. “I just never dueled against a girl before.”
“Well, don’t take it easy on me just ‘cause I’m a girl, okay?” remarked Naomi flirtingly.
“Ha! Fat chance! I don’t take it easy on anyone,” countered Vincent.
“Fat? Who are you calling fat,” yelled Naomi.
“You..I mean..gah!” Vincent muttered.
“Oh, Hone’,” Naomi started. “I’m just kidding. But enough with the pleasantries! Let’s duel!”
“Yeah,” Vincent’s mood changed instantly.
“Let the duels begin!” yelled the Tournament Official. Everyone activated their duel disks after meeting with their designated opponent. Then without any warning, they yelled out “Let’s Duel!”.
“Are you ready, Naomi?” Vincent asked. “I won’t hold back…”
“Don’t bother,” Naomi said confidently. “I won’t even need to break a sweat on you, Vincent.”
“Fine then, bring it on!” Vincent challenged.
“I’ll go first! I draw (6),” Naomi announced. “I play a monster in defense mode (5). Then, I’ll place 1 card face-down and end my turn (4).”
“That’s all?” Vincent asked, longing for a challenge. “Watch this! I draw (6)! I Summon Marauding Captain (3/1200/600) in attack mode! His effect lets me Summon a level 4 or below monster this turn, which will be Sacred Knight (4/1800/1200) in attack mode! Now I attack with Sacred Knight, Proving Valiance!”
“Stop right there!” commanded Naomi. “Open face-down card: Light Explosion! When you attack a monster that’s face-down, it, along with all your monsters, is destroyed.”
All monsters on the field blew up in pixels and let out a large spark of light.
“Next, I can Special Summon 1 monster from my hand with a level equal to or lower than the total level of monsters that were destroyed -2,” said Naomi.
“Huh?” asked Vincent like he didn’t understand a thing she just said.
“Let me make this a little simpler for you. The total level all monsters destroyed by Light Explosion was 8. Eight minus two is six. Therefore, I can Summon a level 6 or lower monster from my hand, that of which will be Tethys, Goddess of Light (5/2300/1800) (3). Though Tethys cannot attack due to Light Explosion’s effect, I can return Time Angel (1/200/1000) to the top of my deck since it was destroyed by a card effect.”
Vincent started to think about this move. “Why would she want Time Angel on the top of her deck? Drawing into such a useless monster isn’t the best way to maintain control of the duel.” He then looks down at his duel disk and sees something on the [url="http://i215.photobucket.com/albums/cc235/setojim/TrinityDueldisk.png"]"Field Analysis"[/url] screen. “Ah. So that’s why she did it. When you draw a Fairy-Type monster while Tethys is face-up, you can draw another card, and if that card is also a Fairy-Type, then you continue the cycle. If this works, she can draw a lot of cards.” Vincent then turned to Naomi. “I place 1 card face-down (3) and end my turn.”
“Very well, I draw (4),” announced Naomi. “I reveal Time Fairy to draw another card (5). Then, I reveal Manju of the Ten Thousand Hands to draw another card (6).”
“Please don’t be a Fairy-Type…please don’t be Fairy-Type…” Vincent said to himself.
“Looks like you got off easy. I didn’t draw a monster. However, that doesn’t mean you’re in the clear. I Summon Manju of the Ten Thousand Hands (4/1400/1000). Now I can add a Ritual Monster or Ritual Spell from my deck to my hand. But it won’t stay there long; I activate Dawn of the Herald (5)!”
“Oh no…” Vincent said with fear.
A statue appeared of a monster onto the field.
“I sacrifice Tethys from my field and Time Fairy from my hand (4) to Ritual Summon Herald of Perfection (6/1800/2800) in defense mode (3).”
Tethys exploded and 5 little lights erupted from the pixels and Time Fairy appeared and exploded a second later and 1 little light erupted from the pixels. Then, all 6 lights went inside of the statue. The statue then started glowing. Suddenly, a blue monster with orange, green, and purple colored wings appeared in defense mode.
“Behold: Herald of Perfection!” Naomi said with intimidating confidence. “But that’s not all. When I summon Herald of Perfection via Dawn of the Herald, I can remove Dawn of the Herald from play to add 1 of the monsters used for the summoning of Herald back to my hand, like Time Fairy (4). But enough of that! Manju of the Ten Thousand Hands, attack him directly!”
Manju drove one of its 10,000 hands into Vincent’s stomach, furthermore dropping his Life Points to 2600.
“I activate Damage Gate! Now I can Summon a monster from my deck-”
“Stop right there,” Naomi interrupted. “I activate Herald’s effect. I can discard a Fairy-Type monster (3) to negate any card effect you play and destroy it.”
“Darn. Well, moving on…” Vincent said annoyed.
“I place 3 cards face-down (0) and end my turn,” concluded Naomi.
“Not a bad field you got there,” Vincent complimented. “But I can make a pretty incredible move, too. I draw (4)!”
“I reveal my face-down card: Light Return. This lets me return any LIGHT monster from my Graveyard to my hand with 1000 or less ATK at a cost of 1000 Life Points (Doing this brought Naomi’s Life Point meter down to 3000). More importantly, I return Time Fairy to my hand.”
“Hm. That means she can use Herald’s effect again,” Vincent said in his thoughts. “But she can only use that effect one time, which means I can do this.” Vincent then turned to Naomi again. “I Summon Sacred Star (1/100/100) in attack mode (3). When its Normal Summoned, I can send 2 more to the Graveyard to Special Summon, from my deck, Winged Crucible in defense mode (7/0/0).”
“Very well, Vincent. Although, I don’t think I’m going to let you Synchro Summon your best monster. I activate the Continuous Trap Card [Discord], which until my 3rd End Phase, neither of us can Synchro Summon.”
“What?” Vincent said ticked off.
“That’s right. I had a feeling that you were gonna try to use Sacred Star Dragon to get out of this mess. But too bad I’m not going to let that happen.”
“You may have stopped my Synchro Summons, but that doesn’t mean I can’t take down your Herald. I activate Double Summon (2). This lets me Summon again this turn.”
Naomi thought to herself, “Hm. The only thing he can do now against Herald is Summon a stronger monster. I cannot allow that.” She then looked at the lone card in her hand. After, she looked toward Vincent. “I discard Time Fairy to negate your double Summon.”
“Ah ha! I knew that you’d do that! So I activate, from my hand, Forbidden Chalice (1)! Although it may give Herald 400 more ATK, it still negates Herald’s effect for this turn. Which means my Double Summon will go off without a problem. Next, I think I’ll sacrifice my Sacred Star and my Winged Crucible to Summon Sacred Silver Swordsman (8/2600/2500) (0). Now I attack Herald of Perfection; Blinding Silver Rush!”
Vincent’s Swordsman dashed at Herald and slashed it in half and dashed behind it in a dramatic fashion. Herald blew up soon after.
“No, my Herald. It’s gone!” Naomi cried.
“Yes it is," Vincent agreed.
"But how," Naomi asked utterly confused-like.
"Oh," Vincent said obnoxiously. "When my swordsman attacks a monster, his ATK becomes 3000 for the turn. And now that he's destroyed a monster,I have an effect to trigger now: the 2nd effect of Sacred Silver Swordsman to be more precise. Now, since he destroyed monster with a lower level, I get to draw cards equal to the difference in their levels. Furthermore, I draw eight minus six cards, which equals 2 (2). Finally, I’m placing 1 card face-down (1), ending my turn.”
“Not bad, kid. But I have a monster in my deck that not even your Sacred Star Dragon can stand up to. I draw (1)! I play Coins from the Heavens. Now you can draw until your hand has 6 cards in it (Vincent - 6). But if it’s the only card in my hand when I activate it, I draw until I have 6 as well (Naomi - 6). Now I’ll activate my spell card Alchemic Trade (5). Now by sending 2 Spell or Trap cards I control to the Graveyard, I can Summon 2 Alchemic Trade Tokens (2/100/100). Now, I activate the Legendary Shinato’s Ark! (4)”
“No way!” Vincent yelled. “You couldn’t be…”
“Oh yes I can, Vincent,” Naomi interrupted. (Just as she said that, a giant Ark appeared on the field.) Now I sacrifice my 2 Alchemic Trade Tokens and Manju (The said monsters then explode into pixels, causing 4 lights to come from Manju, and 2 lights from each token. Shinato’s ark then opens up and the 8 lights enter it. The ark then closes. A bolt of lightning comes out of a cloud from above the duel and strikes Shinato’s Ark, causing it to explode. Among the debris, a light shines out from among the rest. A figure then emerges from the light.) Behold, Shinato, King of a Higher Plane (8/3300/3000) (3)!”
“Oh man,” Vincent said while staring at Shinato and having a terrified look on his face. “I wasn’t expecting to see him.”
“Well too bad. Vincent, this next attack will wipe you out. I equip my Shinato with Respecting Royalty (2). Now when Shinato attacks a monster with an equal or lower level, the monster switches to defense mode. Now Shinato, attack Sacred Silver Swordsman; and thanks to Respecting Royalty, your swordsman switches to defense mode.”
Vincent had a confused look on his face. “Why would she do that? Switching my monster to defense mode prevents me from taking damage.”
“Shinato, Divine Ring!” commanded Naomi.
Shinato made 7 purple orbs appear, each with a symbol on them, which then all formed into a purple ring that Shinato chucked at Vincent’s Swordsman. His monster then was cut in half then burst into pixels.
“Now I activate Shinato’s Special Effect: When he destroys a monster that in defense mode, you take damage equal to your monster’s ATK, and that’s 2600 big ones,” said Naomi confidently.
Shinato’s Divine Ring went towards Vincent, ready to slice him in half.
“Not bad, but I have Saving Throw! This trap card lets me gain 1000 Life Points any time during the damage Step. Therefore, my Life Points raise to 3600 (Vincent’s Life Point meter goes up to 3600) before Shinato’s attack hits me….GAH! (Shinato’s Divine Ring hit Vincent, knocking him over and leaving him breathless)”
“Fine then, make your move,” Naomi stayed confident. “Regardless if you summon a monster or not next turn, whether it’s in defense or not, I win by the next attack of Shinato.”
“It’s a shame you won’t get to order a next attack then,” Vincent remarked.
“What? No way! You’re absurd,” Naomi responded.
“What’s absurd is you took the risk of giving me 6 new cards; for thanks to you, I have, in my hand, exactly what I need to take down Shinato.”
“You’re bluffing,” Naomi quickly judged.
“Just wait and see. I draw (7). I activate Pot of Avarice (6). Now I can return 5 monsters from my Graveyard to my deck (3 Sacred Star, Winged Crucible, and Sacred Silver Swordsman), shuffle up, then draw 2 cards (icon_cool.gif. Next, I activate One for One and discard 1 monster (5) to Special Summon Sacred Star from my deck (1/100/100). Then, I summon Level Mirror (1/100/1000) in attack mode (4). When this card is summoned, its level becomes that of one monster on the field; this means that Level Mirror’s level becomes 8 (8/100/1000). Also, I remove 3 levels from Level Mirror (Three level stars came out of the mirror and turned into a block of cheese, which was eaten by a mouse.) to Summon Level Mouse (3/800/0) in attack mode (3). Next, I activate Heavy Blow (2). This lets me sacrifice 1 of my monsters and decrease the ATK and DEF of all your monsters by an amount equal to Level Mouse’s ATK. Therefore, Shinato’s ATK becomes 2500. Finally, I will tune my level 1 Sacred Star to my [now] level 5 Level Mirror. A heart of a knight dwelling in the soul of a dragon is raging. Savior of the weak, come forth! Synchro Summon! Emerge, Sacred Knight Dragon (6/2600/2100)!”
A large winged dragon appeared with a large silver blade on its head. It was infuriated and began to roar.
“Sacred Knight Dragon, attack Shinato, King of a Higher Plane! Vengeance Blade!”
Vincent’s dragon slashed Shinato with the blade on its head. Shinato started glowing, then blew up in pixels. Naomi’s Life Point meter then dropped to 2900.
“Now, Sacred Knight Dragon’s effect activates! When it destroys a monster by battle, you take damage equal to the original ATK of Shinato,” Vincent said.
“Original ATK?! But that means I take 3300 points of damage!”
“Correct, my fair lady,” Vincent said in a very lame fashion. “Thirty-Three Hundred big ones.”
Sacred Knight Dragon swung its head blade and the razor-like winds were sent at Naomi. Once they slashed her a couple times, Naomi’s Life Point meter dropped to 0. Vincent then walked up to Naomi.
“That was pretty good. The problem is that you strived for perfection when, in reality, nothing’s perfect,” Vincent told Naomi.
“Thanks again for a great duel,” she thanked Vincent. “Let’s go watch Arturo’s duel…what do you say?”
“Sure,” Vincent said with a determined look on his face.
Vincent and Naomi walked over to the stands and saw Arturo’s final attack.
“Go, Gottoms! Finish him off!”
Arturo’s monster dashed toward his opponent and slashed him, reducing his Life Points to 0. The slash left a large gash in Vashi’s shirt and he fell back. His shirt was covered in blood.
“Someone get an ambulance! Hurry, he may not make it!” yelled someone from the audience frantically. Vincent could only look at the result of Arturo’s attack helplessly.
“I will tear you from Arturo, Thanatos,” Vincent said in his thoughts with a burning flame. “I swear, if it’s the last thing I do, you will pay for this.”

~Fin

Original-Only Cards:

Time Fairy
1
Light
Fairy/Effect
100
100
When this card is destroyed and sent to the Graveyard, return it to the top of your deck.

Level Mirror
1
Light
Machine/Effect
100
1000
When this card is Summoned, you can select 1 face-up monster. The level of this card becomes that of the selected monster.

Level Mouse
3
Dark
Beast/Effect
800
0
You can lower the level of a level 4 or higher monster you control by 3 to Special Summon this card from your hand.

Sacred Knight Dragon
6
Light
Dragon/Synchro/Effect
2600
2100
“Sacred Star” + 1 or more non-Tuner monsters
When this monster attacks a monster with higher ATK than this card, destroy it without applying damage calculation. When this card destroys a monster in battle and sends it to the Graveyard, your opponent takes damage equal to the original ATK of the destroyed monster.

Coins from the Heavens
Spell Card
Your opponent draws until they have 6 cards in their hand. Then, if you have no cards in your hand, draw 6 cards.

Alchemic Trade
Spell Card
Send 2 Spell and Trap cards you control to the Graveyard to Special Summon 2 "Alchemic Trade Tokens" (2/Earth/Rock/100/100).

Respecing Royalty
Equip Spell Card
Equip only to a level 6 or higher monster. When the equipped monster attacks a monster with an equal or lower level, you can switch the battle position of the attack target.

Heavy Blow
Quickplay Spell Card
Tribute 1 monster you control. Decrease the ATK and DEF of all monsters your opponent controls by an amount equal to the ATK of the tributed monster until the End Phase.

Light Explosion
Trap Card
Activate only when your opponent declares an attack against a face-down defense position monster you control. Destroy all monsters on the field. Then, you can Special Summon 1 monster from your hand that has a level equal to or lower than the total levels of the destroyed monsters -2.

Light Return
Trap Card
Pay 1000 Life Points. Add 1 LIGHT monster from your Graveyard to your hand with 1000 or less ATK.

Saving Throw
Trap Card
You can activate this card at any time during the Damge Step. Gain 1000 Life Points.
[/spoiler]
[Spoiler=Episode 4: Slash Life to Shreds! Synchro Summon! Appear, XX-Saber Gottoms! Vincent VS Arturo PT1]
Vincent stood there in the middle of a capacity crowd staring at the dueling field in terror as the duelist laid on the ground covered in blood; his body motionless. Just then, the doors of the arcade flew open and a crew of medics rushed in.
“Everyone, stand clear!” yelled the left medic. He then turned to his crew. “Get him on a stretcher! STAT!” The medics pulled in a stretcher and medical tools to stop the bleeding. They then pulled the stretcher out the door in a hurry.
While everyone stared in horror at the event that they all just witnessed, the Tournament Official walked to the middle of Arena 4. He then raised his hands to the crowd and started to talk.
“I’m aware that this event is quite traumatic to all of you. However, the tournament must continue. The finals will commence in 10 minutes; Vincent Brose’ will duel against Arturo Tetsuma.”
Vincent walked up to Arturo and stared at him with a determined glare in his eyes.
“Let’s go,” Vincent said. “I’m planning to avenge my friend…no…everyone that has been hurt due to these sadistic powers of yours, Arturo.”
“It’s not my fault,” Arturo arguably countered. “Everyone that has been hurt because of my powers did not heed my warning to stand down, and I wasn’t about to stand back and drop my 2 year title as the Duel Monsters Arcade Champion.”
“You couldn’t risk losing a few duels just to make sure someone wouldn’t get hurt?” Vincent roared furiously. “You couldn’t swallow your pride just to keep people out of danger, or is that Thanatos controlling your body and forcing you to do what ever he desires?”
“Thanatos?” asked Arturo completely clueless. “Who is Thanatos? What on Earth are you talking about?”
Vincent began to think to himself. “He mustn’t know that he’s being controlled by Thanatos? I guess I’ll just have to tell him about it later.”
“I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about, Vincent. However, I’m going to give you the same warning that I gave all of my other ‘victims’: stand down before you get seriously injured,” Arturo warned.
“The only way I can tare Thanatos from your soul is to defeat you in this duel…so without further ado, let’s begin the match,” Vincent challenged.
“Very well,” Arturo said. A very evil expression, and eerie smile, gathered on his face. “Let’s duel.”
“The final match for this week’s tournament is about to begin,” the Tournament Official announced to the crowd. “Duelists, please cut and shuffle your opponents deck!” Arturo and Vincent walked to each other, grabbed and cut their opponents’ decks. Afterward, they walked to their ends of the arena. The Tournament Official started back up. “Now that that is complete, let the match begin!” The Tournament Official ran off the arena to give space to the two co battlers.
Naomi then lent over the railing that divides the stands from the arenas.
“Vincent! Don’t you dare lose! You need to stop Arturo at all costs!” yelled Naomi.
“Thanks, Naomi,” Vincent yelled back. “I’ll break him free of this curse.” Vincent turned to Arturo. “Bring it on!” fiercely challenged Vincent again.
Both duelists activated their duel disks, their Life Point meters set to 4000, and they drew 5 cards each.
“I’ll start,” Arturo said. “I draw (6)! I Summon X-Saber Airbellum (3/1600/200) in attack mode (5)! Finally, I’ll set 1 card face-down (4) and end my turn.” Arturo then thought to himself, “When he Summons a monster, I’ll use my face-down ‘Saber Hole’ to destroy it and then mount a direct attack with my X-Saber Airbellum, not to mention that when he inflicts damage to my opponent in a direct attack, Vincent will lose 1 random card in his hand. Bring it on, Vincent; I’m totally prepared.”
“I see right through your plan,” Vincent said confidently. “I draw (6)! I activate Mystical Space Typhoon from my hand (5)! This lets me destroy 1 Spell or Trap card on your side of the field…so say ‘goodbye’ to your face-down card!”
A fierce storm gathered in the middle of the field and blew Arturo’s “Saber Hole” trap right off the field.
“Next, I Summon Sacred Lancer (4/1800/1000) in attack mode (4)! Sacred Lancer, attack Arturo’s monster!” Vincent commanded of his monster. His monster struck Arturo’s lion/human-like monster, causing it to explode in pixels; Arturo’s Life Points dropped to 3800. “I place a card face-down and end my turn (3).” Vincent gave a cocky smile to Arturo. “You’re not going to be able to beat me with predictable antics like that.”
“How dare you,” Arturo said insulted. “That last turn made mine seem like child’s play! However, don’t think that just because you dodged my ‘Saber Hole’ play means you’ll win this; for you have a long way to go. I draw (5)! I Summon X-Saber Galahad (4/1800/800) in attack mode (4)! Now, cut his ‘Sacred Lancer’ down to size; attack!” Arturo’s monster dashed towards Vincent’s monster. “Oh and incase you didn’t know, when Galahad attacks a monster, he gains 500 ATK for this turn (1800 + 500 = 2300).” Arturo’s “X-Saber Galahad” slashed Vincent’s monster in half, causing it to blow up in pixels. Vincent’s Life Points dropped to 3500 and Arturo’s monster’s ATK returned to 1800.
“Hold it,” interrupted Vincent. “With your attack, you triggered my trap: Sacred Comet! This trap can be activated when my monster is destroyed; therefore, I’m able to Summon 1 ‘Sacred’ monster from my deck that’s level 4 or less…so come forth Sacred Knight (4/1800/1200).”
“Fine,” Arturo said aggravated. “Make your move.”
“Thanks,” said Vincent. “I draw my card (4). ‘Sacred Knight’, attack ‘X-Saber Galahad with proving valiance!” Vincent’s monster dashed toward Arturo’s monster. “I also know that when your ‘X-Saber Galahad’ is attacked, it loses 500 ATK dropping it to 1300, making it lower than my Knight’s ATK.” Vincent’s monster slashed Arturo’s down left, then another swipe down right, and destroyed Arturo’s monster; Arturo’s Life Points dropped to 3300. “Finally, Sacred Knight’s ATK goes up by 500 if he successfully destroys one of your monsters (1800 + 500 = 2300). I place 1 card face-down (3). Make your move, Arturo.”
“Not bad. You got passed my first wave of ‘X-Saber’ monsters, but let’s just see how you do against the next wave. I draw (5). I Summon XX-Saber Fulhelmknight (3/1300/1000) in attack mode (4). Next, I activate the Spell Card, Book of Moon from my hand (3)! This card flips your ‘Sacred Knight’ face-down into defense mode. Also, since it is flipped face-down, ‘Sacred Knight’s’ point bonus it got from destroying my ‘Galahad’ vanishes too. Now, ‘Fulhelmknight’ attack his [now] face-down monster!” Arturo’s new monster threw its chain of swords and pierced Vincent’s face-down monster. The card blew up in pixels. “When ‘Fulhelmknight’ destroys a defense monster in battle, I can revive a level 4 or lower ‘X-Saber’ monster like ‘X-Saber Airbellum’ in attack mode (3/1600/200). Now, Airbellum, attack his Life Points directly!” Arturo’s “Airbellum” dashed at Vincent ferociously and slash him with his triple hand blades; Vinent’s Life Points dropped to 1900. Vincent felt weakened by this attack. His shirt got a few slits in it which began to leak out a little blood.
“Argh! That hurt!” Vincent yelled in pain.
“Haha. The pain will continue until you surrender, Vincent,” laughed Arturo. His body started to show the same aura that Vincent noticed in his first encounter with Arturo.
Vincent then thought to himself, “It’s that glow again. Thanatos must be in control. I had a feeling this would happen.”
“I’ll never surrender to you Thanatos,” Vincent countered.
“Fine. You poor humans never give up when it’s prudent. Oh well; on with the duel. I’ll continue your suffering. By the effect of ‘X-Saber Airbellum’ you must discard 1 card from your hand at random.” Vincent took his hand and shuffled it a little. He then took a random card from his hand and placed it in his Graveyard. “Now that my battle phase is complete, I’ll activate this spell card from my hand: Sheath and Saber (2)! When this card is activated, I can take 1 ‘X-Saber’ monster I control and return it to my hand; return to me, ‘XX-Saber Fulhelmknight’! Now, I get to Summon 1 ‘X-Saber’ from my hand of the same level; come forth X-Saber Darksoul (3/100/100) in defense mode. Next, I’ll tune my ‘X-Saber Airbellum’ to my ‘XX-Saber Darksoul’. From the colony of sword masters comes the quick and mighty; crush all with your swift assault! Synchro Summon; appear XX-Saber Hyunlei (6/2300/1300)! When Hyunlei is Synchro Summoned, I can destroy up to 3 of your Spell or Trap cards, Vincent. Therefore, your lone face-down card is history.” Arturo’s monster pulled out its light saber and dashed toward Vincent’s face-down card. Instantly, ‘Hyunlei’ dashed so swiftly, she vanished and reappeared in front of Vincent’s card. She then slashed it, causing it to explode into pixels. “I activate ‘Card of Assistance’ (1). If I have lower Life Points, I can discard 1 card to draw 2 cards (2). Lastly, I place 1 card face-down (1). Now that my End Phase has finally arrived, I can reap the benefits of ‘XX-Saber Darksoul’. When he’s sent to the Graveyard, I’m aloud to add any ‘X-Saber’ from my deck to my hand at the turn’s end…so I add ‘XX-Saber Faultroll’ to my hand (2). It’s your move, Vincent.”
“Alright, I draw (4). Since you have a monster on the field and I have 0, I can Special Summon Star Pseudo (7/1000/1000) from my hand in attack mode (3). I can discard 1 ‘Star’ tuner from my deck to change his name according to that of the discarded monster’s name; so I send my ‘Sacred Star’ to the Graveyard. That in turn changes my monsters name to ‘Sacred Star’. Next, I’ll lower his level to 6 to Special Summon ‘Level Eater’ from my Graveyard (1/600/0).”
“What the…? I never sent that to the Graveyard,” yelled the Thanatos-possessed Arturo confused.
“Oh yes you did,” smiled Vincent. “When your ‘X-Saber Airbellum’ attacked my Life Points directly, I was forced to discard a random card; that card in question was my ‘Level Eater’. Now then, back to the game. Since my ‘Star Pseudo’s’ level was changed to 6, I can now tune it to my ‘Level Eater’. When the light of the sacred star shines upon the weak, it brings life to a new entity. Synchro Summon! Appear Sacred Warlord (7/2450/2000)! Next, I’ll activate my ‘Warlord’s’ effect: I can look at the top 3 cards of my deck, add 1 to my hand, and remove from play the others; furthermore, I add ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ to my hand and remove from play these other 2. Now, ‘Sacred Warlord’, attack XX-Saber Hyunlei with Sacred Saber Rush!!” Vincent’s monster dashed toward Arturo’s “Hyunlei”, pulled out its sword, and slashed it into pieces. Arturo’s Life Points dropped to 3150. “Finally, I’ll activate ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ (2). This card lets me draw 1 more card each turn. However, I’ll lose 100 Life Points for it. I can also remove any number of cards in my hand from play face-down to gain 500 Life Points for each card. Finally, at any time, I can destroy my card to add those cards back to my hand. However, I can’t do that on the turn in which it’s played. So I think I’ll draw my extra card for 100 Life Points (3). That drops my Life Points to 1800. Lastly, I’ll remove from play the card in my hand I drew to gain 500 Life Points (2) (Vincent-2300). That ends my turn.” Vincent then thought to himself, “Now that he’s out of ‘X-Saber’ monsters, he shouldn’t be able to summon ‘Faultroll’ in his next turn.”
“I draw (3),” said Thanatos confidently. He then gave out a slight giggle. “I activate ‘Sabersmith’ (2). This card lets me Special Summon 2 ‘X-Saber Tokens’ to the field once I’ve removed 1 from my Graveyard from play. This means by taking my ‘XX-Saber Darksoul’ from my Graveyard out of the game, I can Summon 2 tokens (2/Earth/Warrior/400/400) in defense mode. Now that I have 2 ‘X-Saber’ monsters on the field, I can Special Summon ‘XX-Saber Faultroll’ (6/2400/1800) from my hand in attack mode (1)! Next, I activate ‘Faultroll’s’ effect: once per turn, I can Summon 1 level 4 or lower ‘X-Saber’ from my Graveyard in attack mode; so come back ‘X-Saber Airbellum’ (3/1600/200)! Finally, I tune my ‘Airbellum’ to my ‘Faultroll’. From a colony of sword masters comes the true master of blades; slash all life to shreds! Synchro Summon; appear, ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’ (9/3100/2600)!”
Vincent stared in horror at this monstrosity of a monster. “That’s a lot of ATK points! Wait a second, that’s the monster you used to injure that last guy! I must take it down!”
“Ha! Good luck,” chuckled Thanatos. “A monster with this much strength can’t be beaten so easily. But before I attack with this creature, I activate his ability! I can sacrifice any ‘X-Saber’ monsters to randomly discard cards in your hand. Now my ‘X-Saber Tokens’, be gone! Now the last 2 cards in your hand, Vincent, are history! At this moment, I reveal ‘At One With the Sword’! This trap can only be played if my only monsters an ‘X-Saber’. Now Gottoms gains 800 ATK, bringing his ATK up to 3900. Also, when he destroys a monster by battle, I can draw 1 card. ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’, attack Vincent’s ‘Sacred Warlord’ with Spirited Saber Attack!” Arturo’s “XX-Saber Gottoms” swung its immensely gigantic sword at Vincent’s monster, slashing it clean in half. His monster exploded in pixels; the shockwaves from the explosion sent Vincent flying about 5 feet back. He quickly got to his feet, though in a bit more pain. It’s as if the shockwaves from Arturo’s attack had forced his wound on his chest to get worse. The blood started to soak through his shirt more. As he rose to his feet, Vincent’s Life Point meter dropped to 850. “Thanks to the effect of ‘At One with the Sword’, I get to draw 1 card from my deck (2). Finally, I’ll lay 1 card face-down (1) and end my turn.” The Thanatos-possessed Arturo looked down at Vincent in his pitiful state. “This is quite pathetic: you weren’t even a challenge for me. I have you on the ropes and, although you’ve shown some fight, you’ve shown me nothing that interests me anymore. You’ve become a boring opponent. Now, hurry up and make your final move so my ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’ can finish you off.”
Vincent looked hopeless and helpless. He’s down to 0 cards in his hand, only his ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ card remains on the field, and he only has a mere 850 Life Points. Vincent then said to himself in a desperate breath, “I have to win this, no matter what the cost.” Vincent then looked at the mesmerized Arturo. “I have to take you down to stop this path of destruction. I draw (1)!!”

~fin

Original-Only Cards:

Star Pseudo
7
Light
Rock/Effect
1000
1000
You can Special Summon this card from your hand when your opponent controls monsters and you don’t. Once per turn, you can send 1 “Star” Tuner monster from your deck to the Graveyard to change the name of this card according to that of the sent monster’s name.

Sheath and Saber
Spell Card
Return 1 “X-Saber” monster you control to your hand. Then, Special Summon 1 “X-Saber” monster from your hand with an equal or less level than the returned monster.

Card of Assistance
Spell Card
Activate if your have 1 or less cards in hand and you have lose Life Points than your opponent. Discard 1 card. Then, draw 2 cards.

Sabersmith
Spell Card
Remove from play 1 “X-Saber” monster from your Graveyard. Special Summon 2 “X-Saber Tokens” (2/Earth/Warrior/400/400) to your side of the field.

Sacred Comet
Trap Card
When a "Sacred" monster you control is destroyed in battle and sent to the Graveyard, Special Summon 1 "Sacred" monster from your hand or deck whose level 4 or lower.
[/spoiler]
[spoiler=Episode 5: Breaking the Sabers (Vincent VS Arturo PT2)]
Episode 5: Breaking the Sabers; Vincent Vs Arturo PT2

All the people in the crowd stared in awe at the sight they were seeing. Arturo seemed to have complete control over the duel; Vincent is barely on his feet. Not only does he have 0 cards in his hand, only 850 Life Points, and 1 card in play, but he’s in severe pain after Arturo’s last attack. Meanwhile, Arturo is sitting with a primo field; his Life Points were at 3150, his ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’ stands tall with 3900 ATK, and a face-down card lays in wait. The situation seems hopeless.
“Oh no,” Naomi cried. “Vincent…he looks really bad out there. Not only is he covered in his own blood, but his dueling condition couldn’t look worse.” She then let out a yell to Vincent. “Come on, Vincent. This can’t be all you’ve got! Show him what the duelist who possesses the ‘Sacred Star Dragon’ card can really do.”
“You got it, Naomi,” strained Vincent. He then turned to the Thanatos-possessed Arturo and thought to himself. “I can’t afford to be defeated. I have too much at stake to lose. Not only will I lose my ‘Sacred Star Dragon’ to this maniac, but my injuries will probably have gotten much more severe and I may turn out just like all of Thanatos’ other victims: barely alive, covered in blood, and ‘constantly knocking on Death’s door’.” Vincent stumbled to his feet. Vincent desperately looked at the card in his hand.
He then thought to himself, “A ‘Monster Reincarnation’? This isn’t going to help…but wait…I still can use the effect of ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ to draw another card this turn.” Vincent looked at Arturo and announced, “I activate the effect of ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’. Now I can draw 1 more card by paying 100 Life Points (Vincent-750).” Vincent mumbled to himself. “Hopefully, this next card can help me end this, because at this point…I’m going to need a miracle.” Vincent then rose and drew with confidence. “I draw (2)! This’ll work! I summon ‘Sacred Blocker’ (4/0/1600) in defense mode (1). Now that my End Phase has arrived, I must remove from play at least 1 card in my hand. So I remove the last card in my hand from play to gain 500 Life Points (Vincent-1250).” The ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ card on the field glowed a bright white. A giant storage garage appeared; the door opened. Vincent’s card in his hand glowed as well. The card then left his hand and went into the garage, which shut afterward. “Your move,” said Vincent.
The Thanatos-possessed Arturo laughed. “That’s pretty pathetic. Your last scrap of a card is that little weakling? This was easier than I thought. I draw (2)!” Thanatos began to think to himself. “I have a feeling that ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ is his real plan. He maybe planning to stall for time so he can get some kind of strategy brewing while the cards he draws are completely protected from ‘Gottoms’. Too bad I have this.” Thanatos raised a card from his hand up. He then played it. “I activate ‘Saber Slash’ (1)! This card allows me to destroy 1 face-up card for every ‘X-Saber’ monster I have in attack mode. So say goodbye to your ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’.” Thanatos’ “Saber Slash” began to erupt with razor-sharp shockwaves that flooded toward Vincent’s spell card, but the waves were deflected. “What the hell?” Thanatos yelled in disbelief. “Why didn’t your spell card leave the field?”
“ ‘Sacred Blocker’ allows me to negate the destruction of one card on the field during each turn and the card I chose to protect is… ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’."
"Too bad for you, Vincent, Gottoms’ still hasn’t attacked yet. ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’, attack his ‘Sacred Blocker’ with Spirited Saber Attack!” Thanatos’ ‘Gottoms’ ran towards Vincent’s monster with its body veiled in light. With its giant sword, ‘Gottoms’ slashed Vincent’s monster in half, causing it to explode into pixels. “Thanks to the effect of ‘At One with the Sword’, I can draw 1 card (2).”
“Maybe, but I have an effect to play as well,” explained Vincent. “When my ‘Sacred Blocker’ is destroyed, I can Summon another one from my deck. Come forth, my second ‘Sacred Blocker’ (4/0/1600).”
“That’s fine,” chuckled Thanatos. “I initiate the ‘Gottoms’ Emergency Call’! This trap card allows me to revive my ‘XX-Saber Hyunlei’ (6/2300/1300) and ‘X-Saber Galahad’ (4/1800/800) from my Graveyard.” ‘Gottoms’ raised its sword to the air. Then both ‘X-Saber Galahad’ and ‘XX-Saber Hyunlei’ burst from the ground. “Now that that’s done with, I activate the quickplay spell card ‘Predictable Summon’ from my hand. For the rest of this turn, any monsters you happen to summon or have summoned during this turn have their effects cancelled for this turn. Although you may get another ‘Sacred Blocker’ when the one you have out is destroyed, they can no longer defend themselves with their abilities. ‘Hyunlei’ and ‘Galahad’ will now wage an attack. First, ‘Hyunlei’ will attack your ‘Sacred Blocker’.” Hyunlei pulled out her lightsaber and swiftly dashed toward Vincent’s monster and slashed it in to pieces. The pieces then broke into pixels. Then, another ‘Sacred Blocker’ appeared. “Galahad, eradicate his last monster!” ‘Galahad’ dashed toward Vincent’s last line of defense and made an ‘X’ shaped slash and cut it down to size. Vincent’s monster exploded into pixels. “At last, your final turn has come, Vincent. You are staring down 3 monsters with a grand total of 8000 ATK. Make this last turn count you fool. Ahahahaha!”
“Hmph…hmhmhmhm,” Vincent gave a feint giggle.
“What’s so funny?” demanded Thanatos. “You’re in a dire situation. Unless your next card can destroy 3 monsters and inflict over 3100 points of damage, you will lose on my next turn. I have ‘Faultroll’s Legion’ in my hand: a card that can revive up to 5 ‘X-Sabers’ from my Graveyard. Who knows what kind of plays I can make with that kind of necromancy.”
“Worry about yourself now, Artur – I mean Thanatos. I draw (1)! I pay half my Life Points to destroy ‘Dimensional Storage Unit’ (Vincent-625).” Vincent’s garage-like building opened the doors. All the cards that were sealed in it flew back into Vincent’s hand (3). The building then blew up in pixels. “I activate ‘Monster Reincarnation’! By discarding 1 card, I can return ‘Sacred Star’ to my hand. At this moment, ‘Sacred Ambush Phantom’s’ effect triggers. When it’s sent to the Graveyard, I can destroy 1 face-up monster, like ‘Hyunlei’.” Vincent’s Graveyard had a purple, transparent hand emerge from it and grab Thanatos’ “Hyunlei” and drag it to the Grave.
“Why didn’t you destroy ‘Gottoms’? The pressure must be getting to you to have you make that amateurish move.”
“Next, I summon ‘Sacred Star’ (1/100/100). When this card is Normal Summoned, I can send 2 more of it to the Graveyard to summon ‘Winged Crucible’ (7/0/1500) in attack mode. Next, I remove 1 level star from ‘Winged Crucible’ to summon ‘Level Eater’ from my Graveyard (1/600/0). Now I’ll tune all of my monsters together to perform a Synchro Summon. When the light of the Sacred Star shines upon the blade of an ultimate warrior, the true crusader of life is brought forth. May the light from your diamond blade illuminate all. Synchro Summon! Appear, Sacred Star Paladin (8/2900/2500)!” From the tuning rings emerged a white armored warrior with a large sword in sheath upon its back. “Now I activate my ‘Paladin’s’ ability. I can now discard a monster to destroy all of your monsters that are stronger than it. Furthermore, I’ll discard ‘Sacred Silver Swordsman’ from my hand. This is why I didn’t destroy Gottom’s first. I wouldn’t be able to wipe out your Life Points if I did it any other way. Now all monsters you have with 2600 ATK or more are destroyed, namely ‘XX-Saber Gottoms’.” Vincent’s “Paladin” extracted a white energy from Vincent’s card and surrounded its sword with said energy. It then drew its sword and slashed Thanatos’ “Gottoms”. It exploded into pixels. “Now it’s time to finish this! Sacred Star Paladin, destroy his ‘X-Saber Galahad’ with Noble Diamond Slash!” Vincent’s monster drew its blade once more, this time aiming to destroy Thanatos’ “Galahad”. “I remember that when ‘Galahad’ is attacked, it loses 500 ATK, bringing its ATK down to 1300.” Vincent’s “Paladin” slashed once down left, then once more to the right up. Thanatos’ Galahad exploded in pixels with a large stream of light. His Life Point meter fell to 1550.
“No!” Thanatos yelled. “I can’t believe he destroyed all my monsters with just one simple move!”
“Oh but there’s more, Thanatos,” Vincent confidently insisted. “My ‘Sacred Star Paladin’ has the ability to attack twice. Which means, you will lose from this next attack. ‘Sacred Star Paladin’, wipe out his Life Points with Noble Diamond Slash!” Vincent’s “Paladin” drew its sword one final time and dashed toward Thanatos.
“NoooooOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Thanatos screamed in fear.
The “Sacred Star Paladin” pulled its sword back and then slashed right across where Arturo’s dragon necklace was and broke through a small barrier that Vincent had anticipated from the start. The attack then slashed the necklace off of his neck. It went flying in the distance. The dark aura surrounding Arturo, that of which only Vincent could see, dispersed. Arturo’s body seemed to lose all life within itself. Arturo fell over and his Life Point meter dropped to 0. Vincent immediately ran over to Arturo’s motionless body. He put his hand on Arturo’s neck to feel his pulse. He could feel a slight pulse, but Arturo’s body was cold to the touch. Vincent turned to the audience.
“Hey! Someone, go out to get the medics…we nee-” Vincent’s orders fell short. He fell over and blacked out. His shirt was completely soaked in his own blood.
Three days passed and Vincent finally awoke. He was surrounded by medics and Naomi. It was apparent that he had awoken in a hospital bed.
“Naomi? Where am I,” Vincent asked still in a daze.
“You’re in a hospital. You passed out after your duel,” Naomi explained. “You’re lucky the medics hadn’t left the premises yet. You probably wouldn’t had made it if they had.”
“Indeed, young lady,” commented the doctor next to Naomi to the right of Vincent. “It is quite odd that dueling could do this much damage to a person’s body. It’s quite obvious that another power was at work there.”
“That’s all fascinating guys. But where’s Korin and Arturo?” asked Vincent.
“Korin’s in the other room being treated for his injuries,” answered Naomi. “Arturo ran off after I told him the story.”
A flashback began to show. It was in another hospital room. Arturo was standing in the middle of the room binging and purging about his loss to Vincent.
“How could I lose to such a noobie!? I’ve been the champion for 2 years at the DMA. Why was it that I lost to such a low rank player like Vincent Brose’??” Arturo then ran out of the room. Naomi then caught a glimpse of him leaving. “Where’s he going?”
The flashback came to a close.
“I don’t know why he left. Maybe he’s still sore after me breaking the news to him. Sadly, I think he’s sorer over the loss to you than the fact that he was practically killing people out there on the floor,” explained Naomi.
“I think he’s just trying to see what went wrong either way,” Vincent said back. “It’d be hard to accept losing a duel without losing a single game in over 2 years. He’ll be fine.”
Meanwhile, far away in a dark and distant place was a dark figure walking through a field. A familiar dragon necklace shined in the moonlight.
“You haven’t seen the last of me, Vincent Brose’.” Said the dark, deep voice.

~fin

Original-only Cards:

Sacred Ambush Phantom
1
Light
Fiend/Effect
200
800
When this card is discard for the cost of a card, destroy 1 face-up monster.

Sacred Star Paladin
8
Light
Warrior/Synchro/Effect
2900
2500
"Sacred Star" + 2 or more non-Tuner(s)
This card can attack twice in the same battle phase. Once per turn, you can discard 1 monster to destroy all monsters you opponent controls with an ATK more than or equal to the ATK of the discarded monster.

Faultroll's Legion
Spell Card
Activate only if you control no monsters: Target up to 5 "X-Saber" monsters from your Graveyard; Special Summon them with their ATK reduced by 1000.  You cannot Special Summon monsters other than "X-Saber" monsters during the turn this card is activated.
NOTE: This card was only mentioned.
[/spoiler]

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“Ah! Nothing beats going out and playing Duel Monsters on a Saturday morning!”
Vincent Brose’ is a 20 year-old duelist who lives in Liaf Town, Japan.
[b][i]Oh...kay. I can just imagine what the rest of this will be like from just these two sentences. The most boring opening I've ever encountered in my life.[/i][/b]
He has blue eyes, blonde hair that reaches down to his elbows, and a very laid back personality. It’s Saturday, which means its time for a Duel Monsters tournament at the [b]Duel Monsters Arcade[/b]. Vincent is on his way to meet up with his best friend, Korin Faerie.
[b][i]Description must be made at the right timing. If this were a book, I would be going straight to the bookstore to ask why they even bought this.[/i][/b]
*Knock* *Knock*
[b][i]Knock. Knock. It hardly makes sense. This isn't a play, and "Knock Knock" is the worst way of describing someone knocking the door.[/i][/b]
“Hey!” Korin said. “Lemme go get my gear and we’ll get going.”
[b][i]The door never opened.[/i][/b]
“Gotcha,” Vincent replied.
About two minutes passed and then Korin emerged from the door. Then, they were on their way. Neither of the two drove a car so had to walk.
“So who do you think is gonna show up this week?” Korin asked.
“I don’t know. I’m hoping to have a challenge this week,” proclaimed Vincent. “By the way, you should see what I got last night.”
“What is it?” asked the curious Korin.
“You’ll see when we get to the arcade. I don’t feel like being late,” answered Vincent.
“Okay. Fair enough. But what did you mean when you said that you want a challenge this week? You’ve never made it passed the first round at the arcade.”
“Remember when I said that I got something last night?” Vincent remarked. “It’s going to help me win the whole thing.”
“You’re barely a match for me as it is. I doubt whatever you got last night is gonna help you win a duel, let alone the whole tournament.”
“Trust me. The bad duelist that you thought I was is no more. I’ve been reborn. You’ll see,” Vincent said confidently.
“Alright. I’ll believe you for now,” Korin then turned his head. “Well, we’re here.”
The Duel Monsters Arcade is a large, blue building with a large “DMA” on the top. The two friends walked though the automatic doors.
[b][i]I was hoping for a good description of the building. So you give me these hints: (i) large, (ii) blue, (iii) with a large "DMA" on the top. I can see a seriously good view in my head, yeah right.[/i][/b]
“Wow! We have a huge crowd today,” said Vincent.
“Well, well, well; look who it is,” said a voice from the crowd.
“Rona,” Vincent said in one word.
“So, are you ready to get your amateur butt kicked again this week by yours truly?” said Rona in an obnoxiously snobby way.
“Heh. We’ll see who beats who this week, Rona,” countered Vincent confidently.
“Hey! Hey! Wait guys! Save all the dueling for the tournament. It just so happens that the two of you are in the first match,” said the tournament official.
“REALLY!?” said Rona and Vincent.
“Yep. In fact, the match begins in the next 2 minutes. How about we go ahead and begin, since you’re both fired up to duel each other.”
“Alright,” said Vincent.
“Wanna lose quickly, eh? Fine. Let’s do this!” Rona said.
[b][i]Not so fast! Evangelion plays:
[img]http://img835.imageshack.us/img835/1777/115072z.jpg[/img][/i][/b]
Both of the pumped up duelists walked up on to the arena.
“Trust me, Rona. This time, I’ll be the one to come out on top.” Vincent confidently challenged.
“Well then, punk. Bring it!”
The two of them activated their duel disks and drew their opening hands. Their Life Point meters set themselves to 4000.
“Since you’re so confident you’re going to beat me again, you can start,” Rona said.
“Very well. I draw! (6) I place 1 card face-down and end my turn (5).”
“That’s all? For someone so confident in his victory, that isn’t much of a move. You have no monsters to protect yourself. I draw! (6) I summon Vorse Raider (4/1900/1200) in attack mode! (5)
[b][i]Vorse Raider. Too much vanillas in a particular deck show the lack of creativity in the writer.[/i][/b]
Now, show Vincent why it’s a bad idea to leave himself wide open!”
“Heh. Predictable,” said Vincent. “You activated Dimensional Prison. This card takes one attacking monster and traps it in the different dimension.”
Rona’s Vorse Raider disappeared in a vortex in the sky.
“No way!” said Rona surprised. “I can’t believe I fell into such an obvious trap. But I didn’t think you had a good card like that in your deck.”
“I guess that’s what you get for being so over-confident,” said Vincent.
“Whatever. Your move.” Said Rona.
“Alright. I draw. (6) I activate Starburst. (5) By giving up 1000 Life Points, I can Summon a “Star” Tuner monster from my deck, like Sacred Star (1/100/100).
[b][i]What sort of OP'ed card is that?[/i][/b]
Next, I can Special Summon Knight of the Stars (3/1300/1000) from my hand since I control a Tuner monster. (4) Oh and by the way, I have 2. (3) Next, I think I’ll give my 2 knights a tune up by combining them with my Sacred Star. When the light of the Sacred Star shines upon the weak, it brings life to a new hope. I Synchro Summon Sacred Warlord (7/2450/2000)!”
“ASynchro Monster!?” Rona said.
[b][i]Even here, said. At least he should scream. And by the way, there's no such thing as an Asynchro monster.[/i][/b]
“You never used Synchro Monsters!”
“Maybe because before yesterday, I was a naïve duelist. Since then, my entire game changed. Now then, back to the duel. I activate Sacred Warlord’s ability. Now I can look at my top 3 cards and add 1 of them to my hand. Then, I remove the other two from play.
[b][i]Holy moly gackamoley hokey pokey rolly poly. A walking Pot of Duality. Run for your life.[/i][/b]
(4) Now, Sacred Warlord, attack Rona’s Life Points direcrtly!”
Vincent’s monster ran at Rona and slashed him with its immensely large sword, then fell back. Rona’s Life Points dropped to 1550.
“Now, I’ll place 1 card face-down and end my turn. (3)” said Vincent.
“How did he become so good?” Rona asked himself. “Just last week, he was the worst duelist that attended the arcade. But now, he’s making me look like a novice.” Rona then turned to Vincent, “How did you become so good in only a mere week?”
“It’s funny you ask that. Up until last night, I was still the same, weak duelist. But last night at about 9:00PM, a strange man came to my door and gave me a card. It was an incredibly powerful card, but that’s not what changed me. When I touched the card, I felt like my soul had been reborn. That’s what has made me a better duelist.”
“That’s gotta be the lamest story I’ve ever heard. I’ll show you what a real duelist can do. I draw. (6) I play Fiend’s Sanctuary to Summon a Metal Fiend Token (1/0/0). (5) Then, I’ll sacrifice it to Summon Minoan Centaur (6/1800/1000). (4) Next, I activate his ability to sacrifice himself to Summon 2 Level 4 Beast-Warriors from my deck in attack mode. So I Summon a Vorse Raider (4/1900/1200) and Gene-Warped Warwolf (4/2000/100). Last, I’ll activate Solidarity. (3) This card enhances the ATK of all my Beast-Warriors by 800 points so long as Beast-Warriors are the only monsters in my Graveyard. Now, Gene-Warped Warwolf attack his monster!”
Vincent’s monster blew up in pixels and his Life Points became 3650.
“Now, Vorse Raider, attack him directly!”
“No!” said Korin. “This attack will wipe out most of Vincent’s Life Points.”
The Vorse Raider’s attack went for Vincent, but hit Sacred Star instead.
“What the?” said Rona with much expression.
“When Sacred Warlord is destroyed, the Tuner monster used in its summoning is returned to the field in Defense mode.
[b][i]Another OP. What's wrong with this card's maker? Oh, it's you.[/i][/b]
“Fine. You lose next turn anyway. Your move,” said Rona furiously.
“[i]You[/i] lose on [i]this[/i] turn. I draw. (4) Open face-down card, Call of the Haunted. This lets me revive my fallen Sacred Warlord. Then, I activate Sacred Soul Saber. This card increases the ATK of my warlord by 800 (7/3250/2000). Next, I activate Daggers of Demise. This card lets my level 7 or higher Synchro Monster attack for every monster in my Graveyard, up to 3 attacks, in addition to its original attack.
[b][i]WTF is wrong with the Sacred Star cards? They can be Tier 1.[/i][/b]
Warlord, destroy Vorse Raider, then Gene-Warped Warwolf.”
Vincent’s attacks destroy both of Rona’s monsters and dropped Rona’s Life Points down to 450.
“Finally, Sacred Warlord, finish him off.”
Sacred Warlord’s attack slashed Rona and his Life Points fell to 0, and Rona fell to his knees.
“No way! How could I lose to him.” Said Rona.
[b][i]Anyone would lose against Vincent's seriously OP cards.[/i][/b]
“You won! Good job, Vincent.” Korin said.
“And this duel is just the beginning. I plan to win every duel I play from here on.”

~fin

Overall, work harder.
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oh gee thnx. i just posted it to maybe get some feedback. but all I get is someone bein the biggest f'ing critique ever. And as far as broken cards go in fanfics, they can be as broken as they so feel. That's why its called fanFICTION. Also, im not an expert writer so I dont know how to write a fanfic story like famous writers. Lastly, I put a description of all the cards that were original-only in the bottom of the fanfic so you can see if they are still broken.
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[quote name='Vincentity™' timestamp='1288654708' post='4755648']
oh gee thnx. i just posted it to maybe get some feedback. but all I get is someone bein the biggest f'ing critique ever. And as far as broken cards go in fanfics, they can be as broken as they so feel. That's why its called fanFICTION. Also, im not an expert writer so I dont know how to write a fanfic story like famous writers. Lastly, I put a description of all the cards that were original-only in the bottom of the fanfic so you can see if they are still broken.
[/quote]

Maybe I was a bit too harsh. But at least can you just actually listen instead of making a list of reasons why I'm so evil?
I was just pointing out your story's bad parts a normal critiquer of this section would do. Regardless of whether you got upset or not, if you actually edit through on the grammar notes, it'll look a lot better.

At least on the grammar note.
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  • 1 month later...
This is very interesting... I too can't wait for the next chapter. I would also like it if you wouldn't mind, reading mine. It's called "And So It Begins"... here's the link and I hope the next chapter is up soon. http://forum.yugiohcardmaker.net/topic/231356-yu-gi-ohand-so-it-begins-chapter-7-is-up/
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I feel your pain. No one's even reading Seikiden. :(

Hoo, boy. Your review response to EVA up there makes me question whether I should post my little rubric (I came up with it about three minutes ago) at all, but here goes:

CONVENTIONS - [b]C[/b]
Nothing egregious, but this should be a free A. The grammar is the main problem.
CHARACTERS - [b]C[/b]
Reading Chapter I, it seems that Vincent is the [i]villain[/i] -- or at the very least, he has an unwanted Other Self he'll have to get rid of. If you played up that angle, things could really get interesting.
PLOT - [b]C[/b]
See above. Also included here, however, are inconsistencies -- things like Naomi and Vincent boasting about monsters they wouldn't be able to Summon without pure luck.
EFFORT - [b]C[/b]
I get the feeling you were trying, although that's just a feeling.
READABILITY - [b]D[/b]
Gack. Hand counts in the middle of dialogue; long, uninterrupted dialogue blocks; ineffectual, awkward, and infrequent description. Not good.

OVERALL SCORE - [b]40% // C-[/b]
Comments: It could be a lot worse, but it could be a [i]lot[/i] better.

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[quote name='Supreme Gamesmaster' timestamp='1295213586' post='4939152']
I feel your pain. No one's even reading Seikiden. :(

Hoo, boy. Your review response to EVA up there makes me question whether I should post my little rubric (I came up with it about three minutes ago) at all, but here goes:

CONVENTIONS - [b]C[/b]
Nothing egregious, but this should be a free A. The grammar is the main problem.
[b]Aside in episode 1, what is the problem with the grammer? i though i was using good grammer...[/b]
CHARACTERS - [b]C[/b]
Reading Chapter I, it seems that Vincent is the [i]villain[/i] -- or at the very least, he has an unwanted Other Self he'll have to get rid of. If you played up that angle, things could really get interesting.
[b]Wait and see on this one.[/b]
PLOT - [b]C[/b]
See above. Also included here, however, are inconsistencies -- things like Naomi and Vincent boasting about monsters they wouldn't be able to Summon without pure luck.
[b]But that's the thrill of yugioh. the opponent's put each other into a position so that only 1 card, or a series of cards, can get them out of it.
[/b]EFFORT - [b]C[/b]
I get the feeling you were trying, although that's just a feeling.
[b]It's not easy writing a fanfic. But believe me, I'm trying.[/b]
READABILITY - [b]D[/b]
Gack. Hand counts in the middle of dialogue; long, uninterrupted dialogue blocks; ineffectual, awkward, and infrequent description. Not good.
[b]As far as the hand counts go, they were mainly there so that you can tell how many cards are in a players hand. It makes it so that I cant just put like a bazillion cards in a player's hand when in all reality, they had like 2.
[/b]OVERALL SCORE - [b]40% // C-[/b]
Comments: It could be a lot worse, but it could be a [i]lot[/i] better.
[/quote]

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[quote='Vincentity']Aside in episode 1, what is the problem with the grammer? i though i was using good grammer...[/quote]Ladies and gentlemen, your moment of Zen.

Yeah. Internet gramm[b]a[/b]r guides and spell checkers may be of interest to you. Or, yanno, OpenOffice. And really, if only one card out of forty can get a Duelist out of a given situation, methinks they need a different Deck. But other than that, the plot and characters seem a lot more solid than I'd expect from your generic YGO fic.
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While there are some already pointed out flaws cough, said, cough. The only huge thing I don't really like is I want a really exciting duel and I get a kinda bland predictible one. Not that that makes it terrible, it just disapoints me a bit. Besides that if this was an RP or something I could help on, I would sign up faster then you could say a ten minute word. Rate= [b]B-[/b] or [b]7[/b]
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  • 1 month later...
I read the first two sentences and stopped. Don't worry, that happens when I read most of the junk in this section. Here's a piece of advice, though: the thrill of duels is not about each character making ass-pulls every turn. This is something the writers of the actual anime can get wrong, too, but it's simple in concept. Reducing the number of cards a player has to use increases tension, but it isn't a means by itself. The [i]real[/i] key is a character producing Xanatos Gambits out of only a few cards.

Don't know what I mean? Yusei is as good at Xanatos Gambits as he is at ass-pulls. In his duel with Greiger/Bommer (episode 20 or 21, I think), he uses the following combo against SKYFIRE: setting Wasteland Tornado and Limiter Break. No matter which card Bommer destroys, Yusei can either defend against an attack or destroy SKYFIRE, and Bommer has used up a card. If Bommer chooses not to destroy, Yusei can still destroy his own Limiter Break with Tornado to block the attack (which he does).

Even in the silliness that is everything after Episode 64, Yusei can still make clever plays. Using Synchro Material to steal the Stardust absorbed by Wisel is one example. When he faces the Polar Star Gods, how about his set-up of Trick Mirror, Zero Force, and Shooting Star Dragon to neutralize the three gods and Gjallarhorn? That's actually not quite as good, as it's a bit more of a Batman Gambit, since if Harald had not activated Eye of Odin the combo would have failed.

Want to know how Yusei thinks? It looks something like this...
[spoiler='Episode 148, if you're curious'][img]http://www.majhost.com/gallery/matanui0011/YuGiOhRG/thinklikeyusei.jpg[/img][/spoiler]
Yusei gets to make ridiculous draws (sometimes) because he has the power of glowing tattoos. When he draws Savior Dragon, he's literally stacking, since the card actually [i]isn't there[/i]. When he reveals five Tuners with Shooting Star Dragon's effect...well, come on, that's just plain awesome. Every other time he does it, it's just overkill, since it's lost its impact.

Unique Tropes Count: 3

Not that I expect you to read this...
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