Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted March 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 Freaking yes, comments. Well, these two chapters were very nice, except the part about two kids being the Resistance, that was a little lame, especially with how stereotyped that whole scene was in my view. Also wasn't it incredibly convenient that all information regarding Juruo and the rest had been passed around... sounds a little bizarre to me, considering the confusion that must have erupted in the city, no matter how prepared the enemy was. I wonder why none of the three (Nero, Demon, Pallas) was satisfied. I can guess why Nero and Pallas but nothing particularly bad for Demon happened in that scene. Think that's bad description on my part, when I say younger, Luca and Tyrana are both 15, slightly younger than the average YGO protagonist. Not Mel's age. Loose lips sink ships. Although there shouldn't have been that much to go on, 'all about you' was a bad turn of phrase. Demon didn't get the card due to Pallas would be the most obvious cause of his annoyance, but generally speaking he feels in a pretty good place right now. Anyway, jumping back, the duel between Hikari and Osborn was great. Except, why does every fanfic that uses Honest have to contain a pun on its name? Sounds like Hikari's injuries are going to become a focal point in a future subplot, I wonder when they'll find a way to heal them (Dian Keto the Cure Master olololol). But what I mostly liked was the last part. If Sabin isn't lying, which I do not entirely reject as an idea, there's someone else out there, and there must be some form of link between the two. I was a bit worried about the Hikari thing, it was something I really wanted to do with her character, but feared people would find the extent of her injuries... ridiculous. You wait til the next duel, it's pun-tastic! (oh gawd). Done a chapter focusing on Sabin yesterday/today. There are several threads of sub-plots being weaved here with all of the five travelling party members, to keep them all involved. Though of course, the plot point of the next chapter is obvious, and it's about time Erin got some exposition. Also, I wonder if it's somehow important that Erin is holding Raviel and Juruo is holding Uria, as opposed to one person keeping them both. It makes them more theft-proof, but... .......? All shall be revealed over the course of the next three weeks.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted March 25, 2011 Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 Demon didn't get the card due to Pallas would be the most obvious cause of his annoyance, but generally speaking he feels in a pretty good place right now. But the Emperor ordered Pallas to hand his card to Demon and he never retracted that order, in fact he emphasized that Pallas should obey so... why would Demon be dissatisfied with that course of events? I was a bit worried about the Hikari thing, it was something I really wanted to do with her character, but feared people would find the extent of her injuries... ridiculous. Well yeah, it does stretch suspension of disbelief a little that it hurts so much when she is as much as touched and yet no one else noticed that something was wrong with her until they were explicitly told, but it was generally well done. .......? The last line kinda makes it obvious that the next chapter will be focused around Mel and hopefully, by extension, Erin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted March 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 But the Emperor ordered Pallas to hand his card to Demon and he never retracted that order, in fact he emphasized that Pallas should obey so... why would Demon be dissatisfied with that course of events? Hopefully future exposure with Demon, Nero and Pallas will indicate more of the dynamics at work here. Of course we know now that Pallas was a stubborn bugger and did not obey, and thus the card was lost later that day, but of course that's all in hindsight. Well yeah, it does stretch suspension of disbelief a little that it hurts so much when she is as much as touched and yet no one else noticed that something was wrong with her until they were explicitly told, but it was generally well done. Yeah it was pushing it, it was something I wanted to do with her character............ as a late idea. :) The last line kinda makes it obvious that the next chapter will be focused around Mel and hopefully, by extension, Erin. '....?' was more a reference to 'but....' Be happy. Chapter 21 is very much all Erin, and a few new characters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted March 25, 2011 Report Share Posted March 25, 2011 I meant to say if there's any plot-related significance to the Phantom Demons being held by different people. Usually that could hint towards a betrayal but since it's Erin I hope not... it makes sense for Juruo to let Erin keep Raviel, but since she took it on the grounds of it being safer than in the hands of the others, she might have wanted to be the one safeguarding Uria as well. Just some random thoughts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexadin Posted March 26, 2011 Report Share Posted March 26, 2011 Sorry for not commenting, I was busy. Well the new chapters where very amusing. I'll await Monday's chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Hey, we're back, at last. Will try to get us back up to speed very quickly with three chapters in two days, as I want the chapter that was to be released on Friday (#23) to be released on Friday. So Chapter 1 of our mega jamborey, and the first of three major new characters is introduced. [spoiler=Chapter 21]Chapter 21 - Fire and Ice Erin stormed downstairs, pushing past a bleary eyed Tyrana and punching the switch that opened the garage door as she proceeded to her runner. Juruo and Hikari followed her, desperately trying to get her to stop. Ignoring his wounds from the fight, Juruo stood in front of the runner, blocking her exit. “Erin, you don’t have a clue where Mel is. You can’t just tear off into the city.” “Get out of my way Juruo. I will turn this city upside down if I have to. You can’t stop me.” “Just think about this. How on earth are you going to find him?” Erin revved her engine threateningly, lurching towards Juruo. “How naive do you think I am to leave my little brother unprotected? In Mel’s duel shield there is a small tracking device, which he agreed to. I can pick up its signal on my runner. As long as he is wearing the shield, I can find my brother anywhere. And if he is in any danger... so help me... Now move!” With no response coming, she swerved dangerously around him and shot out of the open garage. Juruo looked at Hikari, and Sabin who had followed them downstairs. He stared at Juruo. They mentally agreed to settle their issues later; right now they had to catch up with Erin. Easier said than done. Erin was tearing through the streets at a reckless speed. She must have picked up a signal on her runner, Juruo thought, as he and Hikari followed in hot pursuit, the brooding Sabin somewhere behind. They were making their way out of the city, and up into one of the mountains that did hold residencies, where the ore mines were. Erin finally parked her runner outside a burn out building, an old iron smelter that was clearly in disuse. Without a glance back at her allies, she reattached her duel shield to her arm, and hurried inside the decrepit refinery. Inside she found herself standing on a metal balcony, high above the factory floor. In the centre of the floor was a giant furnace pot, with the lid opened wide to expose the still active lava inside. A metal bridge was connecting the balcony she was stood on with the opposite side of the room, crossing a safe distance to the left of the furnace as she entered. To her right, a walkway extended from the right wall out to the open furnace, although how you got up to the walkway wasn’t apparent. There seemed to be some sort of machine on the end of that walkway, a control panel of some kind. Beside it, a figure was standing there, staring idly into the distance. Erin crossed to the centre of the bridge, so that she was facing him directly, a gap of maybe twenty feet separating them. “Alright, I know what you want, and that you have Mel. Where is he?” The figures eyes became focused as he registered Erin’s presence. A young man with spiky flame red hair held up by a black bandana, wearing a sleeveless crimson jacket over a black shirt and jeans. His arms were marked with swirling blue lines that twisted and glowed strangely. Two similar lines came down either side of his thin face, coming straight down over his eyes and ending just before his wicked grin, which was mocking Erin now. He spoke with a sneer of contempt. “Straight to the point, aren’t you boring? Quite frankly, I don’t see what Demon sees in you. My name is Raesir, and I am here for the card. After hearing you had shown up here in this city, I knew it was inevitable that you would end up with it, given how that clown Pallas shows it of like some sort of trophy. So I thought I’d make an offer you couldn’t refuse. You have it now?” Snarling, Erin looked back at the entrance, where Juruo, Sabin and Hikari had just walked in. She took the Raviel card out of her pocket and showed it to him. He recognised it even from this distance, his wild eyes bulging slightly. “I have your card. You have my brother. Hand him over.” Sneering at her, Raesir pulled a lever on the control panel in front of him. There was a sound of grinding cogs and rattling chains as the mechanisms groaned into life. The group watched in horror as a thick chain with a metal hook descended between the two, above the bubbling lava, and tied to the end of it was Mel. He was barely conscious, as he moaned and blinked groggily. “This ore smelter may no longer be in production, but the fire in that furnace is produced naturally. This city was not built on a mountain, but beside a long dormant volcano. The fire inside has never been extinguished, and would have a most horrible effect if something... someone was to perhaps fall in it.” Raesir face seemed much more serious now. “Now give me that card.” Raesir pulled some more levers, which moved another dangling chain, with a small basket attached to it, towards where she was standing. Erin hesitated as she glanced back at the group who were watching from the balcony, but there was no doubt in her mind what was more important. She dropped the card into the basket, and watched as it made its way over to Raesir, whose smug smile had returned, pleased with the success of his little trap and the fury it was causing Erin. He pocketed the card, and began to walk towards the exit. “You low-down coward!” Juruo couldn’t stop himself. Raesir eyes flashed with anger as he looked over at this upstart. “Yeah, insult the bad guy who’s dangling your friend over a tonne of boiling lava. Real smart. However, this is the perfect place for a little fun.” He paused for a moment, then turned and walked back to his starting position. “Tell you what, we’ll duel for it. You win, I give back the card, and your brother in one piece. Lose, and I walk away free. I’m sure you’d rather get him to safety rather than chase me anyway. How about it?” Erin nodded, accepting the terms. The crazed duelist stifled a laugh as he flicked another switch on the controls. A ring of fire burst into life around the duelists, preventing all escape and outside interference. The pair armed their shields, their decks shuffled automatically, each staring down the other. “Let’s duel!” “I’ll start” scoffed Raesir, drawing his sixth card. “I’ll heat things up by summoning Flamvell Dragnov. Then I add a face down and end my turn.” A molten orange dragon emerged from the image of his card, standing on an invisible ground level with the bridges, high above the factory floor (DEF: 200). Erin did not attempt to conceal a smirk at his opening move. “Is that all? It must be hard to find good henchman nowadays. Your Flamvell will be extinguished by the chilling storm you bought on yourself. There is a reason I’m known as the Queen of Ice. First I play the spell card Cold Wave. This stops the activation and placement of all spell and trap cards until my next turn. Then I summon Pilgrim of the Ice Barrier in attack mode.” A noble fair headed warrior appeared before her, wearing strange robes (ATK: 1500). The holographic image of Raesir’s face down card also changed, as it became encased in thick ice. Erin’s eyes flashed with danger.“Pilgrim. Freeze him!” The warrior struck with a magical ice attack, obliterating the dragon with ease. The flame haired duelist grinned at this outcome. “Thanks for that. When Dragnov is destroyed, you take 500 points of direct damage.” There was a brief flash of fire enveloping Erin’s duel shield, causing her to grimace slightly from the mental burn it caused. It soon disappeared, having taken a chunk out of her life points. [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 2]Raesir - Front Row: -. Back Row: Face down. Hand: 4. LP: 4000Erin - Front Row: Pilgrim of the Ice Barrier. Back Row: -. Hand: 4. LP: 3500 Raesir added his next card, his smug smile never leaving his face for an instant. “I’ll melt your ice and your life points away. The only thing that is up for question is if it will be a wild fire, or a slow burner. I can’t play any spells or traps this turn, but I can still go through you directly. I summon Flamvell Firedog to the field. Now attack.” A ferocious hound created out of molten rock leapt out of the card and straight at the mystic warrior (ATK: 1900). It clawed into the warrior, but although it did damage, the warrior was not destroyed (LP: 3100). Erin laughed quietly through the pain that the reignited fire was causing. “I know what you’re trying to do, swarm the field with Firedog and overwhelm me physically. Well good luck, because Pilgrim’s ability prevents it from being destroyed by a monster with attack of 1900 or higher. Thus your little puppy’s effect does not activate. Now as there is nothing more you can do, I draw, and with that Cold Wave’s effect wears off. I summon the tuner monster Cryomancer of the Ice Barrier.” A mystical, dark skinned warrior holding a sword made of ice appeared beside the pilgrim. “Now I tune my level two Cryomancer with my level four Pilgrim to Synchro Summon, Brionac, Dragon of the Ice Barrier!” A swirling chill filled the air as the two monsters vanished into columns of blue light that shimmered like a pillar of ice. The column burst into shards of light, revealing the huge pale blue serpent with enormous wings and a white, star shaped face. The enemy duelist was not afraid of this beast. In fact, he seemed delighted by its appearance.”Ha, I can’t believe you’d let your strongest monster fall into a trap so quickly. And by fall, I do mean literally.” Raesir activated his trap card to reveal, much to Erin’s dismay, Bottomless Trap Hole. A swirling portal opened below the mighty dragon, with a scream the beast sank into it, removed from the game entirely. This was a major disaster for Erin. Most of the remaining cards in her hand were monsters that she couldn’t summon this turn, leaving her wide open. “I place one card face down and end my turn” she said gravely. Staring at Mel’s limb frame suspended above her, she could only hope for a favourable next draw, if she even got one. [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 4]Raesir - Front Row: Flamvell Firedog. Back Row: -. Hand: 4. LP: 4000Erin - Front Row: -. Back Row: Face down. Hand: 3. LP: 3100 “This is too easy.” Raesir was certainly enjoying his entertainment, his smile widening at the sight of his next card. “Alright, time to really bring out the heavy firepower. I release my Firedog, to summon Flamvell Commando.” The demon dog faded away, to be replaced by a demon soldier with a fiery mane and a long tail, carrying a massive gun (ATK: 2200). Raesir opened the graveyard slot on his duel shield, and removed one of his monsters from it. “Now I’m activating Commando’s special ability. By removing Flamvell Dragnov from my graveyard, damage equal to the removed monsters attack is immediately burnt away from your life points.” The monsters cannon of a gun seemed to draw in heat, before firing an explosive shell at Erin, causing here to writhe with pain (LP: 2000). A bead of sweat trickled down here brow. “You just did me a massive favour. Because my life points are now 2000 lower than yours, I can activate my Frozen Soul trap card, cancelling your next Battle Phase.” Raesir blinked. “Huh, well what do you know? If I had attacked first then used the effect I’d have won, on only my third turn. Oh well, I guess I’ll place another face down card on the back burner for now. Come on Erin, give me some sort of challenge, you’re making this way too easy.” “You will regret this.” Erin growled as she drew her next card. Perfect. “I activate my spell card, Magic Triangle of the Ice Barrier. By revealing that the three cards in my hand are Ice Barrier monsters, I can destroy one card on your field, and special summon one of my monsters. So your Commando is getting iced, and come forth...” “Not so fast. I activate my Flamvell Counter trap card. By removing Firedog from my graveyard, your spell is shut down and destroyed. It’s not looking good for you is it, your majesty.” The image of Erin’s spell card burst into a thousand pieces, increasing her dilemma. Great, now what do I do? Well, I can’t summon Royal Knight of the Ice Barrier anyway, as its level is too high. And although an extra draw using the effect of Blizzed, Defender of the Ice Barrier would help, its defence is so low, any other monster that might be in his hand could easily destroy it, leaving his Commando free to attack me directly. So that only leaves the third one. “I summon Spellbreaker of the Ice Barrier and end my turn.” A girl with long white hair and wearing a long red cape appeared between the two duelists, wielding a short staff (DEF: 2000). [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 6]Raesir - Front Row: Flamvell Commando. Back Row: -. Hand: 3. LP: 4000Erin - Front Row: Spellbreaker of the Ice Barrier. Back Row: -. Hand: 2. LP: 2000 “Damn, how did the resistance cause Nero so much trouble with duelists like you in charge? Was Vardus this pathetic as well? Well your last attempt at a move did do you some good. Because I had to remove Firedog from the game, now my graveyard has no monsters in it that I can use as ammunition for Commando. But that doesn’t stop him from blasting your monster to bits.” Another high energy blast obliterated the defending monster. “I set another face down and end. You look in some bother Erin. Well if you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the fire and all that.” “First turn she hasn’t lost life points, maybe this duel is on the turn if she gets a good draw” Sabin commented. “She had better win this. Since you’ve all made your minds up I stole the card, I’d hate it if my ‘work’ was for nothing.” Hikari looked at him furiously, her hands clenched around the balcony rail as she watched the duel unfurl in great angst. “Oh shut up Sabin, this isn’t remotely funny. This is serious. Erin’s been put in a tough situation, her brother is in grave danger, and she is doing her best to save him.” “By giving the bad guy the means to endanger the entire world?” Sabin raised an eyebrow, the trade-off seemed illogical to him. “I know he’s her brother but still. I guess you’re going to condemn me for that as well Juruo? Er, Juruo?!” Sabin looked round, into thin air. ... “It’s my move, and I play Moray of Greed. This returns two water attribute monsters in my hand to my deck, shuffles it, and then I can draw three new cards.” Erin returned the unwanted monsters to her deck and waited impatiently as the deck shuffled automatically; snatching the three cards at the top. This hand was better. “I summon Defender of the Ice Barrier in defence mode.” A large fox with a tail covered in frozen crystals appeared, mutely staring at the Commando (DEF: 1600). “Now I use the spell card, Ice Mirror. This lets me summon another level three or lower water monster from my deck that is identical to the one on the field.” A second Defender appeared beside the first. “Now Defender’s ability activates. As long as I have two Ice Barrier monsters out, your monsters whose attack is higher than their defence cannot attack. I’ll end my turn with a face down.” [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 8]Raesir - Front Row: Flamvell Commando. Back Row: Face down. Hand: 2. LP: 4000Erin - Front Row: Defender of the Ice Barrier x2. Back Row: Face down. Hand: -. LP: 2000 “I get it already; your entire Ice Barrier archtype is based on stubbornly defending until you can bring out the destructive Synchro monsters.” Raesir snapped impatiently. “Bit obvious with a name like ‘Barrier’. It’s an odd deck choice for someone so aggressive, so filled with rage.” Erin just stared back at him calmly as he profiled her. “You just wait. Yes, my aggression is restrained by my deck, but when the time is right, I will unleash a storm on you which you have never felt the like of before. You will regret hurting Mel.” The fiery duelist raised an eyebrow, unimpressed by her threat. “Oh really? Well you seem to have forgotten I don’t need to attack; I can just burn you from here anyway. I activate the Soul of Fire spell card. First of all, it lets you draw a card. Then I can remove one pyro type monster from deck, and inflict damage to you equal to half of its attack points.” Erin watched as he selected a card from his deck, glancing at her face down. If she was to survive, the timing of its activation was critical. Easy girl, don’t lose your cool and rush this. Raesir showed her his card with a smug grin. I remove Flamvell Archer, which has 1000 attack points. So you’re getting hit for 500.” Erin faltered slightly as the burning sensation bombarded her mind again, life points dropping increasingly lower (LP: 1500). “Next I activate Magical Stone Excavation. By chucking away these last two cards in my hand, I can bring Soul of Fire back to my hand. Now I’m activating Commando’s effect. By removing from play the Flamvell Grunika I just sent to the graveyard for Excavation, all your remaining life points go up in flames. Go Commando.” The flame haired duelist roared in victory as his monster lined Erin up for one last burst of flame. “Not just yet Raesir. I activate Damage Polarizer. This negates the effect of a card that would cause me damage.” The monsters flaming shot flew towards her, dissipating harmlessly around her. Unblinking at the negated damage she continued to mention, “In addition, we both draw a card.” Raesir’s face contorted with a hate filled grimace, snatching another card from his deck. “I’m reactivating my Soul of Fire card, by removing the other Flamvell Commando in my deck; I can hit you for 1100 points of damage.” Another surge of flame erupted in Erin’s mind, filling every part of her body. It was painful, but she had survived and that was all she needed, as she began her turn, silently glaring at her opponent (LP: 400). She looked over her replenished hand and allowed herself a small smile. This ignorant hothead has given me everything I need to win this match with his reckless play. I wonder if Demon’s other followers are so talentless. I guess we’ll see soon enough. Standing to full height, she stared at Sabin and Hikari for a second, then to Melanc who was still barely conscious, and back to Raesir. “The storm has arrived. I release my two Defenders to special summon Ice Master.” The two beasts disappeared as massive spiked stalagmite made of ice crystals erupted into the air between them. The crystal prison shattered, to reveal a fair sorceress dressed all in white, carrying a long staff made of ice (ATK: 2500). A chilling breeze rattled through the factory, heralded by the appearance of this monster, one that made Sabin and Hikari shudder as they watched Erin enter her terrifying zone. Her cloak whipped around in the wind, her eyes glazed over white as she stared at Raesir. The sudden change in her look and voice, now cold and harsh, sent chills down their spines. “I activate Ice Master’s effect. Once a turn, I can place an ice counter on one of your monsters. Then by releasing her, all monsters with ice counters on are destroyed.” Raesir’s eyes widened with shock and disbelief as both monsters exploded into nothing. “I don’t get it. Your monster was stronger anyway. Why waste your summon to empty both our fields?” Erin laughed, her altered voice sounding scarily deranged. “Because I want my field empty. So I can play the spell card Ice Age Panic. With nothing on my field, this card allows me to special summon any water monster from my deck. He may have been of no use earlier, but now I summon Royal Knight of the Ice Barrier. Then I join him with Dewdark of the Ice Barrier from my hand. Attack directly!” A giant knight clad in icy armour and a red cape, carrying a short spear (ATK: 2000), and a ninja in a purple garb (ATK: 1200) appeared beside each other, and charged to strike directly. Raesir raised his shield to defend himself, but it did little as he cried out at the twin attack (LP: 800). Erin’s misty eyes flashed dangerously. “Your suffering is not over yet. I tune my level two Dewdark with my level five knight, to Synchro Summon Gungnir, Dragon of the Ice Barrier!” A column of blue light separated the two duelists for one moment, before the powerful Synchro monster crashed through the barrier. An almighty cerulean dragon, standing on all fours, protected by thick armour and wielding razor sharp claws and a wicked spiked tail. The shriek that came from its beak was ear-splitting (ATK: 2500). “I place one card face down and end my turn.” The swing of the tide of battle and the end of her turn seemed to calm Erin down, as her face and voice returned to normal. [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 10]Raesir - Front Row: -. Back Row: Face down. Hand: 1. LP: 800Erin - Front Row: Gungnir, Dragon of the Ice Barrier. Back Row: Face down. Hand: -. LP: 400 Raesir drew his potentially final card, glaring at his opponent with fury. “You think you’re better than me or something? I’ll show you the power of the darkness. I summon a Flamvell Archer to the field in attack mode. Then I activate my spell card Rekindling, which summons all of the fire monsters in my graveyard whose defence is lower than 200.” A demon archer with a bow of fire appeared (ATK: 1000), and was joined by the resurrected Commando, and a small fire sprite, presumably that had been discarded for Magical Stone Excavation. “Next I activate my face down Level Retuner, to reduce my Commando’s level by one. So I can perform my own Synchro Summon. By tuning my now level five Commando with Flamvell Baby, I can summon Flamvell Uruquizas.” Six stars swirled around the flaming vortex that engulfed the two monsters. From it emerged a new demon, a muscular humanoid with a fiery helmet, its fists alight with fire (ATK: 2100). Raesir made his finishing move. “Now I activate Archer’s effect. By releasing him, my Flamvell Uruquizas gains 800 attack points until the end of the turn. Now burn down that dragon!” The demon unleashed a beam of flame from its fists, towards the great dragon (ATK: 2900). Sabin looked at the face down Erin had set. It wasn’t activated. The dragon roared as it was struck by the tremendous blast of heat, and still no face down. Instead, Erin seemed only able to watch as her life points fell to zero. He couldn’t believe it. Hikari couldn’t believe it. Erin had lost. Raesir broke into wild laughter as his monster faded back to the other world. “No contest at all.” Erin looked across at him as her shield deactivated, her voice slow and menacing. “Alright, you won. Now how do I get my brother down?”The duelist did not like having his victory interrupted. “Oh alright, alright. I’ll get him down for you. Here. Catch.” With speed, he withdrew a short sword from his side and drove it into the control unit. The chain holding Mel jerked, and began to fall towards the pool of lava below. Laughing with triumph, Raesir turned and fled the gantry and away as the group watched helplessly as Melanc fell towards the smouldering abyss. “Mel!” The shout came from high above the group, causing them to look up. There, from in the rafters, Juruo had jumped from on high, having tied himself to another long chain, and was swinging in a long arc towards the central furnace. Time seemed to move in slow motion as Melanc fell closer and closer to the bubbling lava, and Juruo’s desperate diving save got closer and closer to him. Mel was five feet away from the fire when Juruo crashed into him. It wasn’t the cleanest of catches, but the impact did enough as his momentum knocked Mel’s chain sideways, so it fell just over the side of the giant pot and to the floor. Juruo’s swing continued back and forth until he came to a stop, dangling in midair, as Sabin and Hikari made their way down to Melanc. He looked across at Erin. She was clinging to the rail of the bridge to keep upright, a look of sick fear on her face. She looked down weakly at Juruo. She didn’t say anything, but a small smile graced her lips. ... The group reunited on the ground floor. Erin rushed to her brother and knelt beside him, checking to see he was okay. He groaned slightly from his awkward landing, but he seemed otherwise fine. His voice was strained slightly as he regained conscious. “Sis... I’m sorry. I woke up in the night, and saw Sabin going out. I went to follow him... but I got lost in the city. As I was coming back, that... guy... chased me on a duel runner, and knocked me out. Did he... did he really beat you? Didn’t you have a face-down?”Erin nodded and hugged her little brother. “Yes, but it wouldn’t have mattered. None of it matters. All that does is that you are safe.” She stood up again, and confronted Sabin, her voice slow and filled with rage. “If you ever, put my brother in danger again...” “Oh come on, how was I to know he was following me? Besides your brother is right, you should have won that duel. You’re all accusing me of dark and despicable actions. You just handed the bad guys what they needed on a plate.” “Sabin, do you honestly believe he would have given the card back had I won?” Erin’s question did not need an answer. “If anything a victory would have provoked him into dropping Mel into the fire, which as it turned out, he did anyway. But I have tested Demon’s allies, and if they are all at that red haired rejects standard, then they are beatable in a one on one match.” “Really, because that’s not the way it looked from where we were standing.” The argument was interrupted by a coughing, and the sound of footsteps high above. Caught in the middle of an open floor, there was nowhere for the group to try to hide. The group looked up at the entrance, hoping it wasn’t the guard. High above them stood a colossus of a man, peering down at them. A huge dark-skinned fellow, dressed in a simple sandy tunic and dark trousers, his long wild hair feel across his face, and a scruffy beard covered most of his thick neck. The seconds dragged as the group stared at the stranger and he stared back down at them. Finally he addressed them. “Is there somewhere safe we can talk?” Here's how this will work, if I get two comments from two seperate readers, I'll give you Chapter 22. You want it, post for it. ;) Regarding Epic's comment: Well lets use GX for an example. Why didn't they just give all seven spirit keys to Jaden? Because it was safer to divide them (and it would be really boring to just watch Jaden over and over defeating every Shadow Rider... oh wait...) [spoiler=Interesting tidbit about names]Raesir Eld, is taken from the Icelandic, and translates roughly as 'fire starter'. Which is pretty cool considering Iceland is baiscially a volcano. Comments, gogogogo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kakashi Hatake Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Well, I have read a lot of it so far but I don't have a lot to say. xD Not really the wordy type so I made you something in Photoshop! =D [spoiler=Yep...] The Majora really has nothing to do with your story what so ever, but I think that Skull Kid is wicked to just go with it. xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Dude that is awesome. Thank you so much. Will put in my sig somewhere momentarily. Glad you're enjoying it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexadin Posted March 31, 2011 Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Wow, losing in her 1st duel. Oh well, I gues her reasoning makes sence.But may I ask, what was her face-down? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted March 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2011 Will post in your profile in a second. Anyway, as promised, another chapter. You lucky, lucky things you ;) Be warned, this chapter contains the longest speech by any one character, but it does explain a lot of history. [spoiler=Chapter 22]Chapter 22 - Welcome to the Family One hour later, and they had arrived back at the warehouse having ridden back through the city, to find the locals staring at them, looking away if they thought they were looking back, and muttering to each other. Now the group found themselves sat around the large table in their temporary hideout with this strange man. Erin was sat on the edge of the sofa, her chin rested on her interlocked fingers as she was consumed in her thoughts. Mel was sat next to her, having recovered from his trauma and back to his spritely self, looking between Juruo and the stranger with equal fascination in each. Juruo and Hikari were sat on the sofa to the siblings left, opposite the stranger, waiting patiently for him to speak. On a bean bag in the corner, Sabin was sulking; his eyes closed and back turned to the rest, but he was still listening intently. Luca and Tyrana occupied the next sofa. Having received a brief filling in, their reaction had been mixed. Tyrana had of course been furious with Erin’s loss, but when confronted by her stare, went decidedly quiet. Luca was more concerned by the appearance of this duelist, Raesir. On the final sofa sat this giant of a man. He scratched at his grizzly beard as he looked around the group in front of him, a simple look in his dark brown eyes. “You do know that duelling is strictly prohibited in the Empire right? If the guards caught you with those duel shields, you would be arrested and possibly even executed, from what I’ve heard.” He spoke in a slow, methodical tone. The obviousness of his statement threw most of them off guard. “Well, yeah, I don’t think there’s a single person in the Empire who doesn’t know that.” Mel retorted. “Now who are you anyway? You look really strong, although you could use a haircut. And how come you were in the smelter when we were?” “Be polite Mel” Hikari interrupted him. “I’m sorry for our young friend. We are aware of the consequences of our actions. You see, we are all members of a resistance group that is fighting the Empire, to try and free the people from the oppression Nero has cast upon them. We need our duel shields and decks as our protection, and our weapons when needed.” The man’s eyes widened. “Did you say you are members of the Resistance? Tell me, do you know a man known as Vardus Jackson?” Erin glanced at the stranger. “I am one of the ranking generals of the Resistance who served Vardus. He led us in an assault on the royal palace in Sen’nenki a few days ago. Vardus confronted a person who called himself Demon, who is operating behind the Empire. He was killed after they duelled. I’m really sorry.” The man looked up into Erin’s eyes, his own glazed over with sadness, but he did not seem shocked. He looked back down at the table. “My name is Barakus. Vardus is my little brother. The last time I saw him was at our father’s funeral three years ago, in our home village. He told me he was forming a rebel movement against the Empire. I tried to discourage him, but for someone with all the brains, he was so headstrong.” Hikari gasped in shock, the resemblance between the two was so obvious. “I’m so sorry for you.” Barakus shrugged. “I feared someday that this would happen, that he would fall in his fight. I checked for signs regularly, but eventually I lost contact with him. But at least he fought for what he believed in, and can rest in peace. I could never be as great as Vardus was. As for our other brother, I don’t believe he will sleep so easily after he leaves this world. I knew his soul was consumed by darkness, about how he had taken his new title of Demon, but I never thought he would descend so far into madness.” Collective gasps came from all who were listening. An image flashed across the minds of the four who had been present at that fateful event, Vardus’ last words echoed in their minds. “...Vir... Br...” Brother. The group moved to the edge of their seats, as Barakus began his tale. “I was born in a village south of here, to Cassius Jackson and his wife, Naomi. I still live and work there as an ironsmith, having inherited my father’s forge. I had come to this city for supplies; I thought there might be some discarded stuff that I could use in the abandoned refineries. When I was four, my mother had her second child, but it was later that I found out she had not had him with my father. She said she had been possessed by a sorcerer who impregnated her, and she bore his child. My parents worked it out, and as this sorcerer did not seem to be coming for the child, my half-brother was named Dravir. Vardus was born a year later. The three of us grew up together in our village, there were maybe thirty other kids in our age group. Being a few years older and helping my dad at work, I grew really quickly, as did Vardus. Dravir however was a sickly child. He was thin and scrawny, and always pale. The other kids picked on him relentlessly, but me and Vardus were always on hand to defend him. People could hardly believe we were related. It was obvious we bore little common resemblance, so our parents made the decision to tell us quite young he was actually our half-brother. In hindsight, this may have been a mistake, but maybe it wouldn’t have made a difference in the end. Dravir always said he felt no connection with our father, and that he felt ‘special’ blood run through him. Despite all this, we still accepted him as a true brother. My childhood was a simple country life, and I enjoyed it. I cannot say the same for my brothers. Vardus found country life too dull for him, and dreamed of the big cities. Dravir seemed consumed by anger and hatred even then.” “Our brother bought a lot of the bullying on himself; he never made an effort to make friends like we did. He went out of his way to tell people he was different to them, better than them. It didn’t matter how many black eyes and bloodied lips me and Vardus dished out, the bullying continued. Then one day, during our teens, we had a visit to the steelworks here, for a work experience class. A group of us were shown the furnaces. Those things were hot. As our group moved to be shown something else, Dravir grabbed a boy by the name of Roderick Jones, one of the ringleaders of his tormentors. He wedged Roderick’s arm in the furnace oven and pressed the door to, laughing maniacally as we tried to pull him away. By the time we had freed Roderick, his arm was burned to a crisp. He never recovered use of it. The incident cost us much in compensation, but worse still was the shunning of our parents friends, who did not want their children around this wicked child.” “This was the first of several violent incidents. Dravir locked Alicia Taylor and her five year old sister in their basement for hours, leaving them scared in the pitch dark until their parents returned home. He broke the fingers of another boy who had continually beaten him up in his youth, one by one. These are but a few examples of his cruelty and lust for pain. Eventually, the mayor of our village met with our parents to recommend a specialist school for troubled kids in the city. Under pressure from their peers and unable to disciple their child no matter what they did, they agreed. Dravir was sent to the private school. I left the village school to begin working with my father, and when he turned eighteen, Vardus graduated as well. He left to study history and the world in the capital.” “I would not see either of my brothers for ten years. My father was diagnosed with lung cancer. My mother had already passed away the previous year. So I had invited him to live with me and my wife, Freya, and our daughter, Yuma. I sent word to Vardus about it, but I had no means of contacting Dravir, since he had disappeared from the private school. Vardus returned immediately, it was good to see him. He had changed quite a lot, he had taken to wearing fancy jewellery he had been given as gifts, and had acquired a fine scar on his face. I joked it improved his looks. He told me and dad the most fascinating tales of things he had seen and done. A part of me wished I had shared my brother’s adventures, but I am not as brave or as clever as he was, I doubt I’d have got out of the dangers he escaped from time and again. The visit seemed to do my father some good. But then the next night, Dravir showed up. He was also different. He looked half-dead, his eyes had become pupil-less and lifeless. He terrified my daughter when she saw him. He claimed he had also endured many travels to the unholiest of grounds, and met his real father, the sorcerer who had bewitched my mother. He looked upon my ill father and cursed him and everything he had taught us about how to behave in life. He offered to ease dad’s pain there and then, and spare him the full grip of the illness. So upsetting was his behaviour, I had to ask him to leave, which he did, but he left with some harrowing words. ‘You humans cling to your pain and your suffering with false hope. You know there is no cure, but yet you pointlessly fight against it. As will the entire Empire in the weeks to come. All this despair and anger, I will free people from it.’ I didn’t know what to make of it. Then, a few days later, war was declared.” “After three years, dad finally passed on. It was quite a shock, as his health had shown no sign of sudden deterioration. Vardus came to the funeral, and we chatted about the Empire and his Resistance group. But life moved on for me and my family. In our little village we were unaffected by the war and the sweeping changes in the ruling of the Empire for the most part.” Barakus paused with a heavy sigh and took a swig of his tea. His avid listeners had been hanging on his every word; this information about Vardus and Demon’s lives was fascinating as it was crucial. “So you haven’t seen Dravir for six years?” asked Juruo. Barakus shook his head. “No, I saw Dravir about eighteen months ago. He appeared in the middle of the night, with two associates, a tall man with flowing white hair, and a stout man with black hair. By this time, he had completely given himself to the abyss. When I greeted him by his name, his face filled with anger. ‘Do not call me by that name. You shall address me as Demon, for that is my true self.’ It was hard not to agree with him, for he no longer seemed human. He had come to offer my daughter a chance to go to the capital with him, and ‘achieve greatness, to be a saviour of this world’. You see, my daughter is gifted. Thankfully she refused his offer. He continued to try to tempt her, eventually he resorted to take her by force, but her powers repelled him.” “Your daughter must be strong to resist someone as poisonously hypnotic as Demon” Erin observed. “He has already claimed to us his subtle control over the Emperor, and we have seen his influence infect others. May I ask how your daughter is gifted?” Barakus chuckled. “You’ll see should you meet her. But rest assured, she was able to keep Demon away for long enough until he eventually gave up. I haven’t seen him since, and not much word on the outside world reaches our little village. I always wondered what he meant by what he was offering to Yuma.” Barakus ended his history lesson with another swig of his drink, and asked what the group knew about Vardus and ‘Dravir’ from their recent experiences. They all talked him through it, how Vardus had over time recruited and trained the four duelists, about his attempts to bring down the Empire, Juruo and Hikari’s fight against Dravir’s old allies Alpha & Omega, and the raid on the palace, where Vardus and Demon fought until the end, Demon using his Demise card to demolish the field and strike Vardus with a crushing blow, before moving in for the kill himself. “After the battle, Demon told us he was heading south to collect the ‘instruments of destruction’, and disappeared. Later we realised he meant these three sacred beast cards. We had obtained two of them, but we lost one to his follower Raesir back at the abandoned smelter.” Juruo passed the Uria card to Barakus, who looked at it. “Yes, I remember Vardus telling me and father the legend of these three cards. The sacred beasts cause a chain reaction that drains huge energy from across the world when they are bought out together, so they were dispersed between the three capitals of the three major nations. So where did you obtain these cards?” “This card was given to us by a knight from the capital that Hikari freed from Demon’s grasp.The other card was 'Raviel, Lord of Phantasms'. Originally it belonged to the defeated nation, and was rewarded to Pallas for his success in the war and kept here, until we wound up with it." “So then, according to my brother’s story, that would leave the third card in the city of Citta del Cascata in the south. After the war, the third smaller nation offered a terms of peace with the Empire, hoping to avoid the fires of a war they stood no chance of winning when it inevitably rose. They merged as one with the Empire with little difficulty or loss. Maybe they were able to hold onto their third card.” “Then that’s were Raesir will be heading, and where we should all go to.” Luca stood; a confident smile broke across his face. “We have to take the fight to Demon and his allies, and beat them to that third card. We are the remaining members of the Resistance. We fight for freedom. That fight used to be against Nero and the Empire, but right now, this Demon is hiding behind them and seems to be looking to crush us all, and we’re the only ones who are going to stop him. The city is two days ride away on our runners, but we can do it. Demon won’t know what hit him.” Luca’s motivational speech was quite impressive. The group exchanged glances, and agreed. They would have to set out for the third city, and stop Demon from completing his plan. ... “I never thanked you earlier, for saving Mel.” Juruo and Erin were stood in the boy’s bedroom. The rest were gathering up and packing items that may be of use on the journey, and getting ready to set off. Juruo had gone upstairs to look for some blankets, and Erin had followed him. She stood solemnly in the doorway before him, as if she didn’t really know what to say. “Don’t worry about it, really. I’m just glad we’re all safe, relatively speaking.” “You are too modest Juruo.” Erin approached him, and started passing blankets over, piling them up in his arms. “When I first recruited you, I thought you were just some kid who could duel reasonably well, but little more than that. You were just another soldier in my eyes. I did not see your full potential, the person that you really are. But the way you selflessly protect others is remarkable.” “Hey, there have been plenty of times when the others have had my back. The five us are a team, and with Luca, Tyrana, and Barakus, we’re growing even stronger. We’d all do the same for each other.” “Perhaps. But you are still too modest. Individually, we may have faltered, but you have held this group together, and drove it forwards. You won’t stop until you face Demon will you? Well, I won’t stop either, until I achieve my goals of bringing down the Empire, and securing an existence for me and my brother that is free from suffering. It won’t be easy, but I hope together, somehow, we can achieve all of our goals.” Erin folded the last blanket and put it on top of the pile, leaning on it slightly as she looked at Juruo in the face. Her expressions were always so difficult to read, but Juruo didn’t think he had seen this one before. She was smiling again, slightly embarrassed by what she had said. She was usually so stern and upright. After a minute, she looked away. “Ha, listen to me going on. Besides, that’s twice you’ve rescued Mel now. I hope you’re ready for him to be on your tail even more now.” The two smiled over her speculative comment on Mel’s idolising. The moment was interrupted by a noise from downstairs. There was a loud voice coming from somewhere, it sounded like someone was shouting orders. The two looked to the door to see Hikari, panic-stricken, running up the stairs. “Pallas is outside, with hundreds of guards. You two need to get down here now.” They rushed downstairs, where Hikari motioned for them to crouch and move along the walls, out of sight from those outside. Luca and Tyrana were pressed against the wall, looking frustrated and worried. Juruo managed a peek out of the window. An unbroken ring of heavily armoured guards stretched around the warehouse. Some of them were armed with duel shields, others carried swords and spears. Standing inside the ring was the fat, balding man with the moustache he had seen on the TV set. He was shouting into a megaphone, and was turning purple with rage. “I know you can hear me you verminous scum! You wrecked my house, and took my card. Surrender yourselves this instance!” “Dammit, they must have been tipped off by the residents. Now they think we were the ones to blow half his estate up. Luca, you got a plan? Because I’m running low on miraculous escapes at the minute.” Luca nodded, a concerned frown deeply set on his brow. “We have an emergency tunnel that stretches some two thousand metres eastwards, taking you up into the mountains. It will be a steep decline going down the mountainside, but you should be able to make it away from the city without any difficulty. Sabin has already escaped with Barakus. Erin, your brother is waiting for you by your runner. The passage is open, just keep going down it.” Erin nodded her thanks, and swiftly made her way to the stairs, disappearing below. That left the other four, who listened as her runner fired up and set off, muffled suddenly as it disappeared down this escape route that Luca had. This was followed by more verbal abuse from the man with the mega phone, and several loud thuds than shook the entire building. “They must have realised we’re not coming out of our own free will” Tyrana shouted over the banging. “We’ve made the warehouse somewhat fortified, but it won’t last forever. We have to go now.” The four abandoned their post and raced downstairs. There they could see that one of the shelving units with various mechanical equipment on had swung forward on a door in the wall, the shelves overlapped the concrete back so it was hidden seamlessly. This doorway led down a slight ramp into the darkness. It was kind of like those bookcases that hide secret passageways in fantasy books. The heavy garage door was becoming heavily dented from where it was being charged repeatedly. Hikari and Juruo saddled up and started their runner, stopping on the edge of the ramp. Juruo looked round, hoping to see the others following on the other runner. They weren’t. They had positioned themselves either side of the doorway, facing it, activating their modern respective blue and red duel shields. “What the hell are you doing? Get on the runner and let’s go!” Luca turned to look back. “You go. We’ll stay here and buy you some time.” “Are you insane? You can’t sacrifice yourselves for us. We can all escape together. Just get on your runner and close the door behind us.” Tyrana shook her head. “Me and Luca have never left this city. We’ll be of no help to you beyond these walls. And you’ll be of no help to anyone if you’re captured. The things you two have done in the names of the people in the face of the Empire, you have achieved more than any other members of the Resistance ever have. You can’t let it go to waste here. You have to defeat the Empire once and for all.” “You can’t let Demon get those cards either. If he gets them, there might not be an Empire left to free.” “I’m not leaving you guys. I’ve lost enough family and friends. I won’t let you give yourselves up like this.” Juruo raised the right arm guard so he could dismount the runner, and lurched forward as he did so. Both Luca and Tyrana had charged the runner from behind, with enough momentum to just edge the front wheel over the edge of the ramp. As Juruo lost his balance, the pair kept pushing, until the front half of the bike was in the tunnel. The tunnel was too tight to turn around, and unable to reach the brakes, the runner started to slide down the gradient. Desperately Juruo got the thing into reverse, trying to back up the ramp. As he and Hikari looked back, light began to fade as the entrance was sealed and hidden. “No!” ... Duel shields activated, Luca and Tyrana faced the garage door again. The locks finally gave away, allowing the door to be lifted manually. Outside wave after wave of guards faced the two young duelists, and behind them was the smug figure of Pallas. Luca nodded to his companion, as Pallas gave the order to charge. They would defend this place until the end. “Surface, ‘Abyss Soldier’!” “Roar, ’Jurrac Guiaba’!” “ATTACK!!!” One last thing that no-one will care about, finally decided on names for each arc. They are in the contents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexadin Posted April 1, 2011 Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Lol @ the arc titles. Well this explains quite some of the origin of Demon. I never expected that relation. Anyway, it was a good chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 1, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Lol @ the arc titles. :lol: Well this explains quite some of the origin of Demon. I never expected that relation. Anyway, it was a good chapter. I wondered if anyone would pick up on the throwaway note at the start of their duel that both Vardus and Dravir were left handed. Was a deliberatly subtle thing. [spoiler=Chapter 23]Chapter 23 - Gears of War Riding smoothly on his sleek black and bronze coloured duel runner, the hooded duelist roamed the mountains effortlessly, skilfully navigated the rocky road with little effort. With a grin, he opened up the engine and roared down the mountainside, dodging a stray boulder with an absent minded flick of the wrist. The speed had always excited him, in his mind you couldn’t feel more alive than when you were so close to death, and this man knew that better than anyone. He also knew his quarry would soon arrive at this location, and he would be waiting for them. ... The group sat around a small fire at the edge of a cave in the mountainside. They had ridden southwards through the mountain range all day. Erin had decided they were best of travelling through mountains for now, so they would be harder to find. As they got further away from the city, they descended down the hillside, where the landscape got increasingly greener. Now night was beginning to fall, and with their destination still another days ride away, they had found shelter for the night, a cave at the base of a mountain. Barakus proved himself a resourceful hunter and competent chef, wading into a nearby river and catching a few migrating fish with his bare hands, then making a filling meal out of them with some potatoes. Now the group sat around their fire, deciding what to do next. The loss of Luca and Tyrana weighed on everyone’s mind, but they had to go otherwise, as Barakus said, they would be insulting their sacrifice. “Anyone know where the third card is likely to be?” Hikari asked. “No idea, we’re still taking a guess it’s even there anymore, however educated” was Erin’s answer. There was a long pause. No one really felt liking talking much. Mel muttered that he was going to bed, and without any further word, snuggled himself up in a blanket and fell fast asleep, something that Juruo found odd. “That’s weird, Mel’s never first to go to bed, you always have to tell him.” Erin looked uneasy at the sight of her brother. “I must admit I’m concerned, I haven’t seen Mel this despondent in a long time. He is brave; I admire him for taking everything that has happened to us since we lost out parents in his stride, and looked on the bright side of life. So I find his current state of mind all the more strange. I’ll try and talk to him tomorrow.” “Can you tell him not to follow me if I go for any more midnight strolls?” Sabin asked, feigning politeness. Erin shot him a dirty look. “What, I’m serious. I get that he’s your little brother and you want to keep him safe, and that he might have been useful in the Resistance, but what’s he done lately?” Erin scowled at him. “He’s been there supporting us all, even you Sabin. My brother is a good duelist and he will do whatever he can to help us. He’s certainly more of a team player than you have been recently.” Sabin rose and stretched, seemingly oblivious to the upsetting nature of his comments. “You’re still hung up about that? Think what you want about me, I’m innocent, and I’m still not letting you off for losing that duel. As for Mel, I’ll believe it when I see it. Until then, he’s a spare part in my eyes.” With that he went he went to his own made up bed, and went to sleep. Shortly afterwards, the remainder of the group called it a night. It was quite cold in this cave, but the fire had to be put out, otherwise the light could attract unwanted attention of a passing guard looking for them. Barakus needed two blankets to cover his mighty frame, and fell asleep quite quickly. Hikari chose a spot slightly away from the others, so she could undress and keep her body hidden, keen for no-one other than Juruo to see her. Juruo himself was sleeping closest to the cave entrance, mind still in overdrive over what had happened today. Finally Erin curled up next to her brother, and discovered he was not asleep at all. After a short brother-sister conversation, fatigue overcame, and they passed into dreamland as well. ... “Wake up Juruo.” Juruo had barely been sleeping anyway. The voice echoed around his head, soft and warm as it might sound, it was still very uncomfortable to hear another beings voice in his mind. Juruo sat up to see if anyone was awake, a part of him was hoping somebody else was hearing what he was hearing. He was disappointed of course, as the others around him looked peaceful in their slumber. Still, this gave him an idea, one that he wouldn’t have dared try if anyone else was awake. He sat up, and spoke into the thin air, hoping for an answer. “Who are you, and why are you in my head?” He paused, straining for an answer. A minute passed, none came. Feeling incredibly foolish, Juruo turned over, and attempted to drop back off into some form of sleep. Then he jumped, as the voice answered him, louder and clearer than before. “My name is Eternia. I am the watcher of the worlds, both the human and spirit worlds, and many others besides. I have been charged with watching over the lives of these worlds, as they are born, grow, and die. I have chosen you, as I can see destruction looming that shall send shockwaves throughout all of these existences, a disaster that must not come into reality.” Juruo paused for a while, uneasy at what he had heard. Finally he addressed the voice again. “Demon, right?” The answer was not as long in coming this time. “Yes, the being known as Demon. He plans to destroy all that exists, with some manufactured doomsday. I swore I would remain impartial, would not interfere, but I cannot stand by and watch so many lives be lost to his madness, when I have the power to stop him. No being has the right to extinguish so many lives. So I have chosen you as my arm, the hand of fate, who will save your world and many others existence.” “Are you sure I can do that, just by duelling him?” “Yes, you will do it. You will face Demon at his stronghold, you will duel him, and you will defeat him. No matter what happens, you must defeat him. I have seen the future, it will be your toughest battle, but you will beat him. Armageddon averted, the worlds will be saved, and life can continue as it should. Nothing else matters.” Something about her tone told him the conversation was over. Juruo had more questions, but the voice did not respond. Cursing, he got up and walked to the edge of the cave, staring out at the world outside. A slight breeze ruffled through the long grass. The clear moonlight reflected of the dew on the leaves of the mighty trees, making the forest sparkle in an eerie pale light. It was incredibly beautiful. A beeping noise broke the serenity. Juruo looked across the cave to where the three runners were parked. For some reason, his was making this beeping sound. Curious, he got on the runner and pulled up the digital display. The map of the surrounding area popped up on screen, it showed his position at the centre of the map, and there, about five hundred metres west, back up the mountains, there was a flashing red dot. Juruo tried to look for some key as to what this dot meant, but there was no explanation. That meant to find out what it was, he would have to go to that location and see for himself. And that could be dangerous; anything could be waiting for him. Juruo sat on the runner for some time, thinking it over. Finally, he pulled down the arm guard, and booted the runner into starting. ... Twenty minutes later, and Juruo was approaching the location indicated on his display, a rugged mountain road that twisted and contorted across the side of the mountain. It wasn’t that far away from the cave, but there had been no direct route to get up here, it had been a steep and winding climb and Juruo had been forced to turn around and change route several times. More worryingly, every time he got so close to the flashing light, it seemed to move. Veering down the left path at a fork in the road, a growing unease started to nag Juruo. In all probability, he was playing right into someone’s hands here. As he sped on, a road that the right path may have led to emerged from a gap in the rock face and started running parallel to his track. A bead of sweat rolled down his cheek. He was right on top of the flashing dot. But there was nothing here. There was a roar above him forcing him to jerk his head up. Another runner, a black and bronze one, was racing up behind him on the road above. From this angle he couldn’t see the rider, but whoever it was going at a crazy speed. The runner shot off the top road and over his head. Alarmed, Juruo slammed on the brakes, as did the bike ahead as it crashed down in front of him. Both runners swerved to a halt, in the middle of this rocky road, with a sheer drop to their left as they had been riding. Furious, Juruo removed his helmet, as the other rider turned on his seat slightly; he wasn’t wearing a helmet himself. It was only now he had turned his runner to an angle with him that he could see his full body. The rider of this other runner was a young man, probably a few years older than Juruo was. He had windswept brown hair and wicked black eyes. But Juruo didn’t pay any attention to his face, as he staring at this guy’s body. He was wearing a sleeveless black riding jacket and jeans, which left his arms exposed. The entire right arm was mechanical, a see through assortment of pistons, cogs, wires and metal that stretched all the way down to the fingerless gloves. The mechanics carried on up past the shoulder under the jacket, which was unzipped. On his chest was a large plate with a large flashing red light on it. Some plating could be seen on the man’s neck, where is had been melded to his real skin. The two stared at each for a few moments, until Juruo broke the silence. “Alright, you’ve got my attention. I’m guessing you are here for my card?” The man chuckled loudly, at some unknown source of amusement. “Yes, I have been instructed to take the sacred beast card from you. My name is Gear, and as you may have guessed, I work with Demon. But I do have a more vested interest in you yourself, Daisuke junior.” Juruo blinked. Why would this guy be specifically targeting him, other than he was holding onto the Uria card, and why was he referring to him by his surname? His confusion must have been obvious, as Gear leered malevolently at him. “You don’t understand what I’m talking about? It’s really not that difficult, but I’ll give you the history lesson. Demon, Raesir, myself and others have been operating behind the scenes of the Empire for years, getting the wheels of our goals into motion. We moved in the shadows, carefully planning, building, until Demon gave us a sure way to achieve our ambition. But we would not be able to do what we wanted in complete secrecy forever. Eventually, people would unite to try to stop us. So we had to strangle the child, before it grew into a warrior. That meant eliminating all the top duelists of the time who could pose a threat to us. I took great satisfaction in taking down a certain five-time duel monsters champion and his precious blue-eyes white dragons.” Juruo felt his blood begin to boil as realisation dawned on him. Now he understood what Gear was getting at, he had just described his father’s cards, his father who had failed to return home one night, and was hung at the gallows before he and his mother could find him. The smirking Gear opposite him became blurred to his eyes. Wiping them furiously, Juruo reached for the accelerator, and revved the engine threateningly, as he struggled with his words. “You killed my father.” Gear nodded, still smirking. “Effectively yes. That cold-blooded brute got what he deserved.” Juruo’s runner lurched forwards towards Gear. With lightning reactions, the duelist spun his bike round so that Juruo missed, stopping side by side, the two duelists level with each other. Each man pushed their head right up against the others, staring into each other’s eyes, both filled with hatred for their opponent. “You will pay for that” Juruo growled through gritted teeth. “You know nothing about my father.” “Oh really? Did you ever watch your father duel?” Gear snarled back. Juruo broke the eye contact for a second. He had seen his father duel sometimes, but not as often as he wanted to, due to school and work commitments. His father was the best, he fought with such tenacity and his deck always came through for him whatever the situation, and he treated opponents with respect. Gear’s smile widened. “I thought not. Well, your father was not the heroic champion you’d like to think he was, I can assure you. I was the best turbo duelist on the circuit, until I faced your father. He maimed me, and because him, half my body is cold metal. I took great pleasure in hunting him down and exacting my revenge, even though I couldn’t pull the lever myself.” Gear raised his right arm, the mechanical wrist spun a few full revolutions in a way no human wrist could, before stopping as he violently clenched his fist. “Well let’s see how good you are Gear. You bought me here to throw down, and now you’re going to feel the rage of my dragons for what you’ve done.” Gear spun his bike round so the two were facing the same direction, side by side. It was amazing how he could look so amused yet so full of loathing at the same time. “Alright, let’s do this, but I wouldn’t get your hopes up of any sort of vengeance you might want. You’ve never turbo duelled before, but it’s simple really. How about first to that corner takes the first turn?” Juruo agreed, and in unison, the pair kicked their runners into action. On Gear’s count, they sped off along the mountain track, with a right hand bend about five hundred metres away. The two tussled all the length of the road, remaining neck and neck as they accelerated. The wind started to whip around Juruo’s body, the ride was exhilarating. He was on the outside, but his runner was lighter than Gears. Flooring it he shot slightly ahead, and took the corner first. The display on the runner signalled a transfer to auto-pilot as it automatically engaged ‘duel mode’, showing a digital representation of both player’s fields, life points, and something called ‘Speed Counters’. “Looks like the turbo duel virgin will be going first, so I’d better give you a tute if we’re gonna have a interesting match. We’ll be using the field spell ‘Speed World 2’ for the duel. With it in play, as we go faster and faster, we each gain a speed counter during the Standby Phase of each turn. Now then, I can have the joy of waxing you myself. Then you’ll have to feel the coldness you’re father sentenced me to. “Let’s duel!” Juruo drew from the deck in front of him with his free right hand, adding the card to the other five in a slot on the left arm of the runner. His opening hand wasn’t great. “I’m summoning Dragunity Partisan in attack mode.” The spear headed purple dragon emerged from a portal beside him, soaring effortlessly by his side (ATK: 1200). “That’ll do for now.” “Then it’s my turn” Gear yelled over his engine from somewhere just over his shoulder. “And with that, we each gain our first speed counter.” On the display in front of Juruo, the number in the top left changed to 1 SC. Gear started to pull up alongside as the pair began a gradual climb at speed. “Now I summon Karakuri Merchant Inashichi, in attack.” A light portal opened next to Gear, and from it came a humanoid like machine, with a wooden body, much resembling a mechanical toy puppet. All the clockwork mechanical parts around the joints were exposed, much like Gear’s arm. This machine wore a domed hat and carried two boxes on a pole across his back, like his name suggested. Its attack was suspiciously low (ATK: 500). “When Karakuri Merchant is summoned, I get to add another mechanical monster from my deck to my hand. That’ll do me for now. You turn Juruo.” [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 2]Juruo - Front Row: Partisan. Back Row: -. Hand: 5. SC: 1. LP: 4000Gear - Front Row: Merchant. Back Row: - Hand: 6. SC: 1. LP: 4000 What? That was it? No face downs, or big summoning? Juruo frowned at the monster he was faced with; something was amiss here, as he drew his next card and watched his speed rise. The two runners leapt over the top of the hill and sped down a wide road to the left, a shear drop to the left into the thick forest below, and a rock wall on the right. But there was just nothing there to stop him from attacking. With a sinking feeling, Juruo gave the command to his dragon to strike. With a shriek the dragon turned and charged the mechanical merchant with its spike. Juruo looked over his shoulder, Gear was just watching the two monsters collide with that same bloody grin. Suddenly, the machine moved its body to protect itself with its pole, and the spear tip was deflected away. Juruo looked back at his display, the monster had somehow switched to defence position (DEF: 1500), and with his dragon having less attack than its defence, he had taken the difference as damage (LP: 3700). “Ha, you thought it would be that easy? The Karakuri are my puppets. When in attack mode, they are forced to attack anything in front of them. But if they themselves are attacked, they automatically switch into defence mode. Even your father didn’t fall for that trap.” Gear pulled up right alongside Juruo on his left and aimed a punch at him with his mechanical arm. Juruo pulled away and back into the runner; sparks flew between them as metal collided. In need of defence, Juruo snatched another card out of the hand slot and rammed into the blade, staring at Gear as he did so. “I play Swords of Revealing Light.” Gear’s eyes widened and danced with delight. “Idiot” he yelled in triumph, and suddenly he dropped back behind. Confused, Juruo looked back as his adversary retreated a short distance, his monster had become surrounded by the swords of pure light. Then there was a bang behind him. The runner lurched and wobbled violently, Juruo slowed down dramatically and fought to get the runner back on track. Gear sailed smoothly past and into the lead. As Juruo accelerated back up behind him, he looked at his display for an explanation, and recoiled in horror. Somehow, half his life points had disappeared! Gear’s hysterical laughter floated over the rushing wind. “You fool. During a turbo duel, you can’t play normal spell cards. If you do, you get hit for 2000 points of damage immediately. Check the field spell for yourself. Luckily for you, Swords has still taken effect, so I can’t attack for three turns, but continue to make careless mistakes like that and I won’t need to.” Juruo bought up the information on Speed World. Speed World 2: If a Spell Card other than a "Speed Spell” Card is activated, its controller takes 2000 damage. During each player's Standby Phases, each player places 1 Speed Counter of their own on this card (up to 12 each). You can remove any number of your own Speed Counters from this card to activate an appropriate effect… Juruo punched the dashboard in frustration. Gear had set him up for this. He had got him angry, and blinded by rage, he had allowed himself to get suckered in to this situation. He looked back over his hand. Five cards, and among them was Pot of Duality, a spell card which was now completely useless to him. “Obviously you haven’t inherited much from your dad. I could just let you hand the card over now, but I doubt you’d back down. You’re just so noble and heroic, trying to save people, it’s sickening. Besides, I’m going to enjoy making you suffer some more. Now if you don’t mind, I’ll begin my turn, and I’ll speed this duel up by activating a speed spell, Angel Baton. This is how you turbo duel. When I have two or more speed counters, I can draw two cards, and then discard one to my graveyard. Next I’ll summon Karakuri Bushi Muzanichicha in attack. I’ll place two cards face down and end my turn.” As Gear moved his cards around, a mechanical soldier with a dark cloak and wicker hat appeared by Gear, flying through the air with due to some unseen force. In its hands was a long sword (ATK: 1800). The images of two face-down cards also appeared briefly, then disappeared again. Thoughts chased each other in circles around Juruo’s mind, as he followed Gear around a corner and up the face of the mountain. What had happened to Gear that had changed him into this half mechanical form? What had his dad done to him to make him so bent on hatred and destruction? And how was he going to win this duel when a third of his deck was now redundant? Just ahead of him, wild laughter filled the night sky. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexadin Posted April 1, 2011 Report Share Posted April 1, 2011 Actually I haven't noticed that, so imo it was well hid. Well besides finding Juruo's moves quite foolish, it was a good chapter. And now that extra chapter finally falls into place. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 Bit harsh on Juruo there. So new chapter is up, and the conclusion of this duel. Answers to all of the questions from Chapter 23 may be found here. Maybe... [spoiler=Chapter 24]Chapter 24 - Dragon Rider The spirit of Rinyan pawed gently at her friends face, urging Hikari to wake up. It was early morning, the sun hadn’t risen yet. Blearily, Hikari forced herself upright and scooped the cat up in her arms, where it started to meow in a distressed fashion. Confused, Hikari walked to the edge of the cave. In the twilight, Sabin was sat on a rock in the cave mouth, with the card spirit of Attack Gainer at his side, staring out into the dark forest ahead. He looked up at Hikari as she approached, before returning to his vigil. “You’re troubled by something, aren’t you Sabin?” The boy pushed his hands back through his silver hair. “Maybe, but it’s my problem, I’ll deal with it.” “You make it very hard for us to trust you when you’re so secretive.” Sabin shrugged. “I’m not used to having people around to trust with stuff. It’s a personal matter, nothing you and the others need to bother with compared to stopping Demon. I don’t want to be distracted by it either, but my damn past doesn’t want to let me go just yet.” Hikari blinked, confused. “We all have to deal with our past sooner or later Sabin. You’ve resolved to stop running and start fighting. But you don’t have to do it alone.” Sabin reached into his pocket, and pulled out his deck, showing it to Hikari. “Course I won’t. I’ll have the Allies of Justice in my corner, even if no-one else is. Then there’s this guy who keeps popping up.” He nodded to the purple suited Attack Gainer beside him, which was still staring out at the world. “I dunno why, but he keeps coming out beside me when I’m up in the night. He’s provided a bit as a confidant, it is really odd though. I can’t even understand why he is even in my machine deck. Sure he is a pretty handy tuner monster, but he still seems a bit random.” Hikari smiled. “There’s a reason for everything. I’ve always drawn the right monster at the right time, be it Fabled or Lightsworn. I’m sure he’ll be of use to you some day.” She let the spirit in her arms down on the floor, watching as it approached Sabin. It sniffed at his boots, before finally purring and rubbing itself against his legs. “We’re all in your corner if you want us to be.” Sabin looked down at the cat spirit, then back at Hikari. There was a long pause. “You still think I blew up the mansion and stole the card?” Hikari stopped, unsure how to answer his question. In the end she didn’t need to, Sabin turned away and continued his gaze into the dark forest. “I thought so. When the time comes, I’ll prove I didn’t do it. Then maybe we can start trusting each other.” ... “It’s my turn now.” Juruo drew another card from his deck. Both players speed counter rose again. [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 4]Juruo - Front Row: Partisan. Back Row: Swords of Revealing Light. Hand: 6. SC: 4. LP: 1700Gear - Front Row: Merchant, Bushi. Back Row: 2 face-downs. Hand: 4. SC: 4. LP: 4000 Ok, I’ve got limited life points left, and I can’t use any of the Spell cards in my hand. But if I remain calm and box clever, I can still win this. I already know his monsters always go into defence when attacked, so I can’t do much damage to his life points that way. But maybe, I can still use this to my advantage. “I summon Dragunity Pilum in attack mode.” A streamlined green dragon encased in a seamless suit of black armour that went from its tail all the way up over its thick neck and head, ending in a narrow spike, sailed beside the other dragon (ATK: 1400). “As soon as Pilum is summoned, I can equip him with a winged Dragunity in my hand. So come forth Dragunity Dux.” The masked warrior emerged from its feathery portal just above Pilum, dropping straight onto its back. The effect of Dux kicked in immediately, raising its attack for each Dragunity on the field (ATK: 2100). “Now, while equipped with Dragunity Pilum, Dux can attack you directly, although the damage done to you via such an attack is halved. So Dux, go get him.” Gear closed his eyes as the warrior and his dragonic steed flew up and over his monsters and rammed into him directly. Blind, he veered violently to the left, going perilously close to the edge of the road and the abyss below, regaining control at the last second (LP: 2950). Juruo continued the assault. “Now Partisan, attack Karakuri Bushi.” Although weaker in attack, the dragon charged the sword bearer, as it automatically moved into a much weakened defensive position (DEF: 600). “How clever you must think you are, trying to use my Karakuri’s effect against itself. But you just did me a favour, as it triggers off my trap card, Karakuri Trick House. When a Karakuri switches into defence, this card lets me destroy one card on your side of the field. I think I’m going to pick... Swords of Revealing Light.” The light swords surrounding the two machines exploded into nothingness. Juruo grimaced as the swords disappeared; annoyed he had hung himself and his new strategy by chasing cards he didn’t need to. “Alright fine. But you’re still losing your monster.” Indeed, the Partisan dragon speared the defending mechanical samurai and destroyed it. Gear didn’t seem too fussed. “I activate Call of the Haunted, bringing Bushi straight back. You need to step it up Juruo.” “Alright I will. I tune my level two Partisan with my level four Dux to Synchro Summon Dragunity Knight - Gae Bulg.” The monsters disappeared, and above him descended the magnificent silver plated dragon and its knight, soaring effortlessly high over his head (ATK: 2000). “This monster is going to help me avenge my father who you sent to his death. I place a card face down and end my turn.” Gear started laughing again as Juruo began to pull up beside him. “That may be true, but only after your father nearly killed me first. Do you want to know the truth about what happened between me and your father? Are you sure you can take it?” Juruo nodded, although he was pretty sure the ‘truth’ he was about to hear was going to be far from unbiased. Gear turned a corner just ahead of him onto a long straight of mountain road. “Seven years ago, me and your father faced each other in the final of the annual turbo duelling championship. I was only fifteen at the time, but I was already the up and coming star of turbo duels. I could push myself and my runner beyond the limitations of fear that held back other duelists. Some said I was reckless, but they just couldn’t appreciate my skill. The final was a great match, going back and forth. It looked like I was going to win, as I rode faster than I ever had before, until your father pulled his wretched ‘Blue Eyes Ultimate Dragon’ outta nowhere.” A hint of bitterness invaded Gear’s tone. “Its attack caused me to crash my runner.” “It shouldn’t have done. The attacks of duel spirits don’t have any real physical effect on people, just a mental belief that they do. The auto-pilot should have been enough to prevent you going off course.” “Bah, like a skilled rider like me uses auto-pilot. That was one of the pathetic excuses your father gave for the accident, ‘He didn’t use auto-pilot. He drove too carelessly.’ Blah blah blah. He just couldn’t admit it was his fault. The crash put me in hospital for months. Both my legs were broken and needed metal inserts to fix. My right arm had to be amputated and replaced by this mechanical one. The life support unit in my chest is the only thing that keeps my heart beating. Then, when I was finally discharged as this half mechanical man, I thought I could go back to racing, that I’d get my rematch. But my sponsors dropped me, my team had used all it’s funding on my operations, and no-one else would take on such a ‘loose cannon’ to ride for them. I lost all hope, all purpose to live.” Silence followed as the pair continued along the road. Juruo couldn’t help feeling sorry for Gear at this point. “Is this when Demon found you?” Gear nodded, and his smile returned. “Demon gave me new purpose, to have revenge on all those who had turned their back on me. Soon, everyone will have to feel the coldness that this body makes me suffer every day, and I myself can be freed from it. Your father was the first to fall. Next will be the rest of this damn world. I draw.” Slamming his foot on the accelerator Gear sped off onto a downward slope. Juruo followed, clearly all Gear had gone through, coupled with Demons toxic influence, had affected his mind, and this made him more dangerous than he had first realised. First he had been angry, and it had cost him, but now realised he couldn’t let himself be controlled by hate, or he’d end up like his opponent. Hopefully, if he could stop him, he might be freed from Demons grip, like Osborn was. “Gear, stop for a second. You don’t have to do this. I can help you. What about the people who saved your life, do you really want to do this to them?” Deranged laughter carried on the wind again. “You must be joking. No-one can help me. Those people gave me an artificial life, an empty life, a half life. I don’t do things by halves, for me it’s all or nothing. And right now, I want the whole world to suffer the nothingness I do. I’ll start by removing its hope in you and your dragons. I activate the effect of Speed World 2. By removing four of my speed counters, I can inflict damage to you based on the number of speed spells in my hand. Currently I only have the speed spell ‘Overboost’ in hand, so I can hit you for 800 points of damage.” Gears speed dropped dramatically as he fell back behind Juruo, as his life points dropped with another bang (LP: 900). “Next I’ll switch Karakuri Bushi and Merchant back into attack, and then I summon Karakuri Strategist Nishipashi.” Another mechanical puppet appeared, this one wearing a long olive green robe and black beret. (ATK: 500). “When Strategist is summoned, the battle position of one monster on the field is forced to change. So I’m putting your dragon into defence mode.” Juruo looked up as his dragon was forced into a guarding stance (DEF: 1100). If he lost it, it could be curtains. “Karakuri Bushi, destroy his precious dragon.” “I activate my trap card, Windstorm of Etaqua. This puts all your monsters back into defence.” Gear grunted as his attack failed, and ended his turn. [spoiler=Sumarry - End Turn 6]Juruo - Front Row: Dragunity Knight - Gae Bulg. Back Row: - Hand: 3. SC: 5. LP: 900Gear - Front Row: Merchant, Bushi, Strategist. Back Row: Call of the Haunted. Hand: 4. SC: 1. LP: 2950 Juruo looked at the growing army of machines as he picked out his next card from his deck, as he added another card to his hand. He cursed, Tribute Doll, another spell card which would cause him damage if he played it. Monsters please. “Fine, I’ll have to make you stop. I put Gae Bulg back into the position he serves best in, and attack Karakuri Bushi again.” The samurai was dispatched effortlessly by the lance of the dragon’s rider as it soared overhead. “I’ll end my turn with a face down.” He glanced back at Gear again, as he drew from his deck. He couldn’t look for long, as the pair passed into a ravine in the mountain side, the road becoming extremely twisty and it was taking up most of Juruo’s concentration to navigate. Somewhere just behind him, Gear made his move. “You really should have got rid of Strategist while you had the chance. I summon the level four Karakuri Soldier Nisamu, and immediately tune the two together to summon the great Karakuri Shogun Burei." Somewhere behind him, there was a roar of metal. “When Burei is summoned, it brings out another Karakuri from my deck. So I can summon Karakuri Ninja Nanashick.” This was torture. Gear was summoning all sorts of heavy firepower, but Juruo couldn’t see it, he was having to concentrate on keeping his speeding runner out of the rock wall. Despite the auto-pilot, Juruo really didn’t want to put all his faith in it on this road. Glancing at the display for a split second, he could see the two new monsters had more attack than Gae Bulg (ATK: 2600 and 2200). But he could use his dragon’s effect to remove Dux from his graveyard and raise its attack to 3500 until the end phase. Even better, from what Gear had said earlier, his monsters might be forced to attack it regardless. “Now I activate my speed spell High Speed Crash. This lets me choose a card on each side of the field and destroys them both. So by sacrificing Merchant, your dragon is sent to the graveyard.” The dragons scream forced Juruo to look, gasping in horror. The mighty beast started to fade away, and behind it, waiting to strike, were a grand living suit of armour, adorned with a torn red cape and horns on its helmet, and a black machine resembling a ninja, with a vicious claw where one hand should be, and a razor ring in its other hand. Gear smirked triumphantly. “It’s over. Attack directly.” “I activate Hallowed Life Barrier. By discarding a card in my hand, this card protects me from all damage for one turn.” Throwing away Tribute Doll, a shield enveloped the runner just in time, as both machines attacked it fruitlessly. Well, at least one of his spell cards had proved useful for something. [spoiler=Summary - End Turn 8]Juruo - Front Row: -. Back Row: - Hand: 2. SC: 7. LP: 900Gear - Front Row: Shogun, Ninja Nanashick. Back Row: Face down. Hand: 2. SC: 3. LP: 2950 Gear scowled as this latest attempt was thwarted. “Why keep fighting? There’s no way back into this match for you now. All your pathetic hopes are useless when it comes to cold hard facts, this life is full of misery, suffering, and let downs. We’re doing you all a favour with what we’re going to achieve, and you can’t stop us.” Riding out of the canyon, Juruo looked back as his opponent drew closer. He was right, he was too far gone, there was no helping him. “That’s what this is about; making you feel better, and trying to justify it as a noble cause? There are things in life that are worth fighting for Gear, even if you can’t see them for yourself. I may not be able to stop you, but as long as I can feel something good, I’m going to damn well try. I draw, and I summon Shield Wing in defence mode.” A skeletal green lizard with feathered wings soared from the portal beside him. It tucked its wings in front of its body and into a curled shell, still moving alongside its duelist (DEF: 900). “Now twice each turn, Shield Wing is able to survive battle and continued defending me. I’ll place one more card face down and end my turn.” Juruo looked at the road ahead. The pair started back down the side of the mountain, a steep road that was heading back into the thick forest far below. Juruo recognised it was going back in the rough direction of the cave where the rest were camping. He just needed to survive one turn, then if he got a good draw... “Cut the soppy mush Juruo.” Gear snatched a card from his deck “I thought after you’d lost your dad and lived your life in oppressed poverty, you’d know about the hopelessness of this life. There’s nothing for you in life except pain and anger, you hear me? It’s my turn, and you should be very worried because now I have five speed counters, and you know what I can do from here. If my next card is a speed spell, you’re about to crash and burn. Draw!” Juruo pleaded that fate was on his side as Gear whipped his next card from his deck. There was a long, dreadful pause. Had Gear missed his draw, or was he just toying with him before finishing the match? “I activate Overboost, which increases my speed counters by three. Then by giving up seven speed counters, Speed World 2 lets me draw another card.” Gear looked over his new hand, seeming to be considering his options. “Now I’m activating the effect of Karakuri Shogun Burei. This lets me change the battle position of one monster on the field once per turn. I may not be able to destroy Shield Wing, but I can do more than enough damage. Shogun, attack.” Relieved, Juruo wasn’t particularly surprised by this tactic by now, as he watched his monsters wings open to reveal its weak body (ATK: 0). “Not this turn. I activate my face down card Wotan's Judgement. By returning one spell card in my hand to my deck, the battle phase for this turn is ended immediately. Then I can draw another card.” “So that was your real defence after all? Clever, I guess you want to keep Shield Wing around in order to summon a powerful monster next turn. Well I hope you didn’t have a Synchro monster in mind, because I’m activating the trap card Discord. Now neither of us can Synchro Summon for three turns. I’ll summon Karakuri Watchdog Saizan in defence, and with him out I’ll end my turn.” A mechanical dog appeared beside the other two monsters as Gear looked to swarm his ranks again (DEF: 1800). [spoiler=End Turn 10]Juruo - Front Row: Shield Wing. Back Row: - Hand: 1. SC: 9. LP: 900Gear - Front Row: Shogun, Ninja Nanashick, Watchdog. Back Row: Discord. Hand: 2. SC: 1. LP: 2950 The two duelists roared down the mountain road, getting faster and faster as they careered dangerously over the rough terrain. Juruo sensed that this match was getting further out of their control, and needed to end soon. He put his hand on his deck, feeling the pulse of his cards reverberate through his mind, and drew, smiling slightly as he saw his card. “First I’ll put Shield Wing back in defence. Then I’ll call Dragunity Corsesca to arms.” A fleshy coloured dragon appeared, shaking its head as it stretched its black wings, waving its three pronged head spike at Gear (ATK: 800). “Another tuner monster? What’s the point with Discord in play?” “There’s always a point to everything, even if you can’t see past its apparent weakness. I drew Corsesca through the effect of Wotan’s Judgement. But I put my hope into my deck, and its responded for me, because my monsters will fight beside me to protect our worlds to the end. You have more than one earth based monster out on the field, so I can special summon Alector, Sovereign of Birds.” A humanoid creature fully encased in shining silver armour, its giant red wings spread and talons bared (ATK: 2400). “But being special summoned isn’t Alector’s only ability. Once per turn, I can select one card on the field, and for the duration of the turn, its effect is negated. So I’m choosing Discord. So now I’m free to Synchro Summon whatever I want. I tune my level one Corsesca with level six Alector to Synchro Summon Dragunity Knight - Trident.” Emerald green light illuminated the night sky, as the large electric blue dragon soared overhead (ATK: 2400). “Now I activate the final effect of Speed World 2.” “What? You can’t!” Gear screamed at him from somewhere behind. “Oh yes I can. You think after I got caught out the first time I wouldn’t fully look up the cards effect, especially after you so kindly advised I do so? Well now I’m going to turn this whole duel against you. By removing ten speed counters, I can have one card on the field destroyed. I’m going for Karakuri Shogun Burei.” Juruo’s runner slowed down sharply, letting him look at the horrified shock on Gear’s face as he shot past him. The great suit of armour seemed to explode from the inside, as it fell crashing into the ground at high speed, forcing both runners to instinctively swerve around it. Now the two duelists were wheel to wheel, Gear frowning furiously, Juruo fighting to keep his jumbled mix of empathy and anger towards his father’s executioner at bay, and resolve to win the match. “Trident, attack Karakuri Watchdog.” The great dragon responded as it charged from on high. Much to Juruo’s surprise, the mechanical hound changed into attack to meet it (ATK: 600), and took a massive hit as it was severely outmatched. Yet it stayed on the field (LP: 1150). “When Watchdog is in attack mode, he’s not destroyed by battle” Gear wheezed. He seemed breathless from the attack. Snatching out another card, he looked over his hand, his eyes searching wildly for answers in it. Juruo waited for him to make his move. Activating the now re-enabled Discord was backfiring on him, but Juruo knew he was still in danger with only Trident and Shield Wing on the field unprotected, and no cards in his hand. As they continued to charge down the mountain, Gear must have a move left. The sound of the engine of the other runner roaring behind him, followed by a loud smash, one that shook Juruo in his seat as his runner lurched forward, sent his senses into overdrive. Looking backwards, he stared in disbelief as Gear rammed into the back of his runner, a malevolent smile on his face. Steel scraped against steel as the two runners collided, as Gear’s machine pulled up alongside him. Juruo shunted back, but too little avail. Gear was level now and was starting to push him to the left, towards the edge of the road, and the steep slope down into the forest. Desperately Juruo tried to shove back, but his machine did not have the power to match Gear. If he could just hold out until the bottom of the road. Gear pulled out, and rammed back into him at speed. The fresh momentum did its job, and with a triumphant laugh, Gear watched as Juruo and his runner went over the side of the road and careered down the steep rock face. Bouncing around in the cockpit, Juruo tried desperately to hang on to the controls as the bike charged headfirst down the side of the mountain. Lights were flashing in his face, brakes were squealing underneath him as they fought against speed and gravity. He was still moving at great pace as the rock turned to grass and he lunged into the forest below, crashing through several bushes that did little to slow him down. His eyes opened wide in horror as a large tree jumped into his path. The runner finally stopped, a bit more abruptly than normal. His helmet collided against the dashboard, and everything went black. ... The black and bronze runner rolled into the forest where the rider had pinpointed the crash site. Following the trial of destruction, Gear spotted the tree against which his opponent’s runner had finally come to rest. Parking his own bike, the half robotised duelist walked over to the crash. Steam was billowing out of the engine. The rider was slumped back against his seat, hanging across one of the arm guards, blood seeping from under his helmet. Fool. Gear systematically rifled through his pockets, until he found what he was looking for, the legendary card sealed in a strap around the guys arm. Pocketing the Uria, Lord of Searing Flames card, he walked back to his runner and set off into the distance, leaving Juruo to his fate. Approaching the end of this arc now, I've just got to write the last two chapters for next Friday. Hopefully will have my net security updated by the weekend so should be uninterrupted. *Note to anyone writing a YGO fanfic, I wouldn't recommend using Karakuri. They are just so tricky to do steady damage too. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lexadin Posted April 4, 2011 Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 Eh, I know Gear's brainwashed and stuf, but really? Isn't he a bit too cocky, blaiming everyone besides himself? Anyway, I'm glad that too see that people here know there is also a different option besides dueling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted April 4, 2011 Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 It has been a while since I commented on this (well, not that much if you exclude the downtime, but your posting rate made it seem like a lot). I must say I am extremely satisfied with the progress of this story. I was a little iffy about the events of the second arc, but you tied it up very neatly with Erin's and Juruo's duels. Concerning the latter, I must say it was one of the best Riding Duels I've read in fanfics. You portrayed the challenge of a beginner Riding Duelist very well, especially under the circumstances. And the interval chapter ended up tying in, even though I insist that it wasn't quite the right time for it back then. I do have some thoughts concerning Erin throwing the match - Sabin's argument was by far more logical than hers, but it just goes to show another aspect of her character. I'm a little amused by the fact that in two duels, Demon's lackeys managed to get their hands on two of the Phantom Demons. I expected Juruo to hold on to Uria for a while. Anyways, really great job so far. Keep it up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 Eh, I know Gear's brainwashed and stuf, but really? Isn't he a bit too cocky, blaiming everyone besides himself? Anyway, I'm glad that too see that people here know there is also a different option besides dueling. As a young hotshot, Gear had an overflated sense of his talent, hence his refusal to use auto-pilot or even wear a helmet. You may have skipped over it in the chapter, but when attacked directly by Dux/Pilum, Gear shut his eyes. He has no-one to blame but himself, but of course he can't see it like that. I would say he is more just bitter and twisted, and exploited than brainwashed. It has been a while since I commented on this (well, not that much if you exclude the downtime, but your posting rate made it seem like a lot). I must say I am extremely satisfied with the progress of this story. I was a little iffy about the events of the second arc, but you tied it up very neatly with Erin's and Juruo's duels. Concerning the latter, I must say it was one of the best Riding Duels I've read in fanfics. You portrayed the challenge of a beginner Riding Duelist very well, especially under the circumstances. And the interval chapter ended up tying in, even though I insist that it wasn't quite the right time for it back then. I do have some thoughts concerning Erin throwing the match - Sabin's argument was by far more logical than hers, but it just goes to show another aspect of her character. I'm a little amused by the fact that in two duels, Demon's lackeys managed to get their hands on two of the Phantom Demons. I expected Juruo to hold on to Uria for a while. Anyways, really great job so far. Keep it up! Thanks Saber. It does help when you're so far ahead of everyone else. :lol: Looking forward to catching up with Dead Zone. Thanks for the flattering comment. I just wanted to have a go at a turbo duel, but it would have been just silly for Juruo to have been given speed spells as well. So I thought the handicap might give a 'how's he gonna get out of this one?' feel. Yes the interval chapter was mistimed. It was a late decision to do it, as an extra dimension and fun duel to do, and didn't really want to do it mid-arc. Not really sure what to add about Erin's duel, she has her reasons, whatever they may be. Sabin is always pretty quick to question others, even though he's being quite shifty too. You'll be pleased to know no doubt he's getting some exposure soon too. So now we have a race on, for the third and final card Haman. Who will get there first? Tick tock. Six more chapters to go now, a lot is going to happen, chapters are starting to get slightly longer and moving locations as the cast grows more, there are some exciting duels left. Next update on Wednesday, the half way chapter, and it will be quite a biggie.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted April 4, 2011 Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 So now we have a race on, for the third and final card Haman. Who will get there first? Tick tock. I laughed out loud. Concerning the ever-increasing cast you mentioned, this was actually one of my concerns that did not make it to the previous comment. It seems to me that you are introducing a lot of characters that seem decently important, and yet throw them away quickly, and so far the central cast has not extended past the main group. I was hoping at least Carla or the other two members of the Resistance would somehow be more significant overall, but it seems we won't be seeing any of them for quite a while, if at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 4, 2011 I laughed out loud. Concerning the ever-increasing cast you mentioned, this was actually one of my concerns that did not make it to the previous comment. It seems to me that you are introducing a lot of characters that seem decently important, and yet throw them away quickly, and so far the central cast has not extended past the main group. I was hoping at least Carla or the other two members of the Resistance would somehow be more significant overall, but it seems we won't be seeing any of them for quite a while, if at all. What the... oh for god's sake!!! (facedesk) Ok, edit session of four chapters tomorrow erasing that error <_< Well, just had a count up there are 11 new characters appearing in this arc (have done or will do). Barakus is with the party, and he will get further expansion, as I can garuntee so will Raesir and Gear. I wouldn't give up hope on all the other characters yet, some may reappear yet... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 Well, just got in from a god-awful shift at work, so to cheer myself up I'll get on and post this. Chapter 25, the halfway point of the story, and fittingly, a lot of major stuff is going on. This has been by far away the hardest chapter for me to write to get as good as I can, hopefully I've done it justice. Let me know ok :) So read on... [spoiler=Chapter 25]Chapter 25 - Chase for Hamon Pacing back and forth, a motion that was making a clinking sound on the cold stone floor that reverberated around the circular room, Demon waited for his allies to bring him news. He had lost patience with having to answer to Nero, and put up with that tool Pallas, and so had left the city to ‘attend to other matters’. Now he was in his castle, his base, a dingy candle lit fortress in the mountains in the centre of the Empire. This castle had seen many battles, and was a perfect location to get to most places from. He rolled his head, stretching the neck muscles, to keep his concentration. Everything was going to plan, yet lust for its completion made him impatient. Finally, a flame haired man with strange tattoos on his arms and face entered his chamber. “I just got word from Gear, he’s obtained the second card” said Raesir, delight etched on his face. “Two down, one to go.” A smile appeared on Demon’s pale skeletal face, he looked frightening even on the rare occasions that one might say he was ‘happy’. Well, happy probably wasn’t the right word, he was never what most would call happy, just... satisfied. He made his way over to a door at the back of the room. “Yes, now obtaining the third shouldn’t be too much trouble. I trust Gear is heading to Citta del Cascata directly?” Raesir nodded, and followed Demon. The pair made their way down a short tunnel that opened up into a cavernous room with an open ceiling that let in the early morning light, the only room in the castle which natural light entered. At one end of which stood a great stone arch, covered in mystic symbols. This arch was the real reason Demon and his cult had located here. Demon moved over to a small altar in the centre of the room. On this sat a small machine, black and kind of egg shaped, with transparent material at each end that shielded an electromagnetic rod inside each. Three slots were in a gold band around the devices ‘waist’, with a fourth around the other side. With his left arm, Demon pulled the device upright. “Your dad said this would take a lot of energy to activate right? Are the sacred beast cards going to provide enough?” “We have been over this Raesir. Everything is moving accordingly. My father won’t lie to me, he has no reason to. He is the one who made things clear to me, who has nurtured my ambitions after all.” Raesir shrugged. “Alright, alright, keep your hood on. Well anyway, if you’re cool here without me, I think I’ll go and join Gear. I doubt that resistance group are going to give up quietly, but they don’t stand a chance against any of us. They got to this card quick, I’m still not sure how they got it out of Pallas’ mansion, but they got to it. It’s a sure fire thing they’ll be heading to where the third card is.” Demon stifled a quiet laugh. “You are too brash Raesir, don’t be so dismissive of those rebels just because you managed to defeat one of them. Did Gear say he had actually beaten his opponent?” Raesir shook his head, come to think of it, it was weird Gear had been so forthright and not elaborated on how he had won the duel. Demon looked up at the arch, shaking with silent laughter. “Don’t worry; I’m not overly concerned about them myself, that situation is under control. Regarding the third card, if you feel you’re presence will be beneficial, then go. Before you do however...” Without looking at his associate, Demon put out his open palm. Raesir smirked, taking the Raviel card from his pocket. He passed it to Demon, who in turn placed it into the right of the three slots. The transparent ends of the device started to crackle with lines of blue light, each stretching from the tip of the rod to the edge of the space. The flame haired duelist turned and left the room, leaving Demon with the machine and the giant archway. ... With a great effort, Juruo opened his eyes, vision blurred for a few seconds as he tried to take in his surroundings. He seemed to be in someone’s bedroom, and there were two people looking over him. He recognised, after a moment’s thought, one was Barakus. He didn’t know the other though, a woman who was quite plump, in her working gown and apron. She had her brown hair tied up in a knot, perhaps she was a cook of some kind. She seemed pleasant enough. Looking down, he could see the spirit of the Decoy Dragon resting its head on his stomach, staring at him with its big soulful eyes. His head was throbbing, glancing at a bedside mirror, it was bandaged, and there was a large cut on his lip. Juruo tried to speak, but instead emitted a croaking cough. Barakus passed him a glass of water, frowning heavily. “You’re very lucky Juruo. It was early morning when we realised you had disappeared, and after some searching, found you in the forest, sitting unconscious in your runner that had smashed up against a tree. Can you remember what happened?” Juruo choked on his water as images of the nights duel came back to him. He explained everything that had happened, how he had faced a duelist named Gear, who was responsible for the capture and killing of his father, the details of their duel, and being forced him off the road. He did however leave out the conversion with the voice, Eternia, which was haunting him. Barakus’ frown intensified. “What you did was incredibly stupid, and has cost us greatly. I doubt you’ll be surprised to learn that the Uria card you were holding has gone. It appears this Gear took it while you were knocked out. Now that gives our enemies at least two cards. I just hope they haven’t got the third.” “Oh dear, please calm down. This boy’s health is our main concern right now.” The woman spoke for the first time, her voice soft but with a sense of sternness behind it. “Don’t worry, you are physically fine, the duel runners are designed for heavy impacts as old war machines, and would have taken most of the brunt from the crash. You’re shaken and bruised, but nothing broken.” Barakus nodded irritably. “Dearest, we are fighting enemies seeking the end of the world here.” The large woman cast him another stern gaze. Barakus sighed and gave up. “Juruo, you are in my house, in my village, which is a short way north of our destination. After we found you, we managed to free you from the crash and Sabin bought you here. Your runner however, was damaged irreparably and had to be abandoned. Since we really can’t get three on a runner, as proved this morning, we’ll have to make some alternative arrangements for transport tomorrow, so we can head to the city of Citta del Cascata. I had suggested the others go off and we two would catch up, but they didn’t want to leave you behind. But enough of that; let me introduce my wife, Freya. She is a chef by trade, but is also a skilled first aider. I’ll leave you with her, while I talk to the others downstairs.” Barakus left the room, closing the door behind him. Juruo wanted to get up and join him, but as he moved, the dragon flew up in front of his face. With some strength, Freya pushed him back into bed, telling him to rest. Unable to summon the energy to argue, Juruo laid back and stroked the dragon spirit. What a silly thing to tell him to do, he thought, how could he rest when he had given Demon the second card he needed? ... Barakus made his way downstairs to the living room of his house. More of a log cabin than a house, it had been constructed with thick beams of oak, that seamlessly made up the ceiling and the thick supporting pillars too. His father had been involved constructed this house along with his friends, although he lived in another one that they had built together ten minutes away, where his forge was. Freya was the daughter of one of his father’s friends, and it was well received by both families when they started courting. After Freya’s parents passed on, she and her family inherited the house. Now he made his way into the large open sitting room that made up the entire downstairs floor, a kitchen section being only semi closed off at the back. Around the room sat the others, various degrees of concern on their faces (except for Sabin who was scowling, as usual, and Erin who was just staring at him blankly, as usual). Barakus sat himself in a large armchair by the fireplace, placing his hands in his lap. “Don’t worry, he’ll be okay.” There was a collective sigh of relief. Barakus went on to relay everything Juruo had told him. At the end, he simply sat back in his chair, pushing his hands through his thick mess of hair. Sabin stood up. “Well, what are we waiting for? We know Demon has the second card, and that his henchmen are probably well on their way to get the third. We can reach Citta del Cascata by nightfall if we go now. Forget Juruo, he’s done enough. We need to get to the third card first.” Everyone looked over at Erin, who they all saw and respected due to her senior ranking, to make the decision. She paused, then shook her head. “We’re not going tonight.” Sabin’s temper flared. “Why not?” “We cannot take the five of us on two working runners, for a start. All six of us need to go, we deserve to go. We are a bigger thorn to the Empire as a unit than we are as individuals.” Sabin opened his mouth to argue, but she over-ruled him. “No, we’re not leaving people behind Sabin. We need to stick together, if we are to prevent occurrences such as what happened to Mel back in Sennen’Yama.” Mel, who was standing by a wooden bookcase, admiring an album of Barakus’ family photographs, looked around at the mention of his name. He was still being quieter and more subdued than usual, only really speaking to his sister. Erin had mentioned they had had a chat, but didn’t want to discuss it with the others in detail. His words were still filled with some encouragement, but were not as cheer filled. “Yeah, Juruo was beating this robo-man until he started cheating. And Erin wouldn’t have held back so much against Raesir if he hadn’t been holding me hostage. On a level field, we’re better duelists than those guys. If we work as a team, we can do anything.” Sabin gave Mel a dirty look. “Oh yeah. Well newsflash, the field isn’t level. Bad guys resort to such tactics, and we can’t afford to give them any more weak links they can exploit. Talking of weak links, what exactly do you bring to this team Mel? Erin and Juruo have lost the sacred beast cards, but you’ve had to be babysat all the way.” Erin stood up, as her brothers shoulders visibly wilted, and with one swift motion pulled her hand back, and slapped Sabin hard across the face. Cursing and rubbing his jaw, he turned and opened his mouth to say more, but was interrupted as the front door opened. In walked a teenage girl, and several jaws dropped. This girl was achingly beautiful. She had a striking figure, which was complimented by a slimming black dress that was cut at the thighs, her skin was healthily tanned and unblemished. Her all black look was completed by short heeled boots and long silky fingerless gloves. She removed a large summer hat and shook out her thick black waist length hair, which had a violet flower in. A silver wristlet with some text on was placed on her right wrist, and several necklaces hung around her neck that fell over her breasts. Her dark brown eyes sparkled as she looked across the collection of strangers that were gawping at her. Barakus cleared his throat. “Ah, everyone, this is my daughter Yuma. Yuma darling, these are some friends I met during my visit to Sennen’Yama. They were working for uncle Vardus in his resistance movement in the capital. You may want to sit down dear.” Yuma stared blankly at her father. Her voice was soft, and quite sorrowful, although she did not look sad. “I know what you’re going to say dad. I already know. Uncle Vardus died a few days ago. The spirits told me. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I thought it would sound wrong coming from me. Then you’d left for the city. Maybe it was best you heard it from uncle’s friends.” She looked around the group again, seeming a bit daunted by the number of strangers. “Excuse me; I think I want to be alone right now. I’m sorry for your losses, past and future.” She bowed slightly, and made her way upstairs, everyone’s eyes following her. The two girls were dumbstruck, Mel blushed slightly, and Sabin looked positively thunderstruck. Barakus sighed and sank back into his chair. “Teenagers. They just won’t talk to their parents about anything. That girl of mine is even more secretive than most, especially when it comes to the spirits.” ... There was a knock at the door, which Freya admitted entry too. Juruo blinked as this stunning raven haired girl walked in, and greeted Freya. Obviously this must be the daughter Barakus had mentioned. “Hello mother, I’m sorry I was out so late... oh, is this another of dad’s friends?” “Yes Yuma dear, this is Juruo. He had an accident on his duel runner. The group will be staying with us overnight, then they’ll be going to Citta del Cascata with your father.” Juruo waved weakly from his bedside as he was introduced, suddenly feeling incredibly foolish as he did so. Yuma shrugged. “Whatever.” She gave Juruo an odd look, glancing at the small blue dragon beside him. “Hmm, the spirits seem to be attracted to you. Maybe it is because you are one of the five warriors they speak of. If I may be excused, I’ll get my room ready.” With that she left, leaving Juruo extremely confused. ... The next morning, Barakus knocked on the door of the spare bedroom, where the three boys were sleeping. Juruo staggered out of bed to answer him, feeling tired, but otherwise physically restored. Juruo followed his giant host down to the living room, where Freya was busy making a pot of tea. She, along with her daughter and a surprising volunteer in Sabin, had cooked a mighty stew for them all, the best they had eaten in a long time. Sitting in a house and observing Barakus’ family made Juruo think about his own mother, who he had no way of contacting now she had fled the Empire. Juruo followed Barakus outside, and gasped in shock. Waiting outside was an enormous black chopper, a very retro style bike complete with flame patterns, tassels on the end of the curved handlebars, a long double seat and huge silver tailpipes. A wizened old man was standing beside it, holding an old helmet with goggles. “Here you are Barakus, she’s running smoothly for you today. I know you’ve been good with her in the past, so I shouldn’t need to tell you not to scratch her.” “Don’t worry Gizmo, I’ll look after her. Thanks.” The two exchanged a jovial handshake, and Barakus invited Gizmo to breakfast with them as additional thanks. Apparently he had been a friend of his father, and worked as a mechanic when duel runners were common. Juruo told him about his crashed runner, Gizmo said he would love to work on one again, but nowadays he would struggle for parts now the Empire had put him out of business. All he asked from him as payment was that he returned things ‘to the good ol’ days’, before tucking into his bacon and eggs. An hour later, everyone was up, breakfasted and ready to go. All they needed was a plan of action, which Barakus was willing to provide, as he strapped on his helmet. “If we can get to the city as quickly as possible and find somewhere to spend the night, then we have the rest of the day to look for the last card. Citta del Cascata is part of the Empire, but has retained most of its own sovereignty, I doubt Demon will be able to just swan in there and take the card. The city is governed by a senate of twelve elders, so it is more likely that the card will be in a civic building than in anyone’s personal home.” “Then what are we waiting for? Gear’s got enough of a head start on us, let’s go.” Juruo was desperate to get on the way. “Goodbyes first” Barakus replied. He turned to his wife and child, who were standing by his side. “I’m sorry I have to leave you again so abruptly, but I must continue on with these people. I know it sounds mad and dangerous, but I cannot stand idly by when Dravir is planning some unthinkable atrocity, and I know there is something I can do to stop him. I owe it to Vardus too.” Freya nodded, smiling. “We understand dear. You shouldn’t feel so responsible for the path your brother chose. But if you think you can do something, then by all means do what you think is right. We support you, don’t we Yuma?” The raven haired girl shrugged. Barakus’ face broke into a wide grin, and he kissed both his girls with great affection. The rest of the party bid their thanks and farewells, and walked outside. The house was on the very outskirts of the village, situated in the middle of a vast plain. The two runners were parked out the back, Erin and Mel took their usual one, while Sabin took Hikari with him. That left Juruo and Barakus on the chopper. The group saddled up, and set off into the distance, Barakus waving back to his family as he drove, until they were out of sight. ... After a long and highly uneventful journey, the group arrived in Citta del Cascata, the southernmost city of the Empire. This place was a lot different to the other two major cities. For a start there was no defensive wall surrounding it, instead the coastal city was blocked off by a river than ran down from the nearby mountain into the sea, crossable only by toll bridge. As soon as the group paid the small fee, they were welcomed like any other traveller. Once inside, this city held great majestic beauty, the houses built out of white stone, with canals flowing through the streets and hanging gardens everywhere. As Barakus had said, after the Empire won the war, the senate ruling this city and its old state came straight forward and offered itself, and as long as they obeyed the Empires law on matters like the banning of duel monsters, they were largely left alone. The group booked three rooms at a small motel - which they had all agreed they would have no choice but to do a runner on - and split up to gather any information they could on the whereabouts of the third and final sacred beast card, ‘Hamon, Lord of Striking Thunder’, arranging to meet back at the motel later in the evening. Juruo and Hikari spent most of the afternoon together, going to all the historical sites and museums, trying to find out anything about old legends or rumours from the staff who worked there, or if they were really lucky find the actual card on display somewhere, like Governor Pallas displayed his. Their enquiries turned up nothing except odd glances, the employees had never heard of such a card. Sitting outside a rather grand church after another unsuccessful enquiry, the duo took a break, Juruo buying some ice creams for them from a local cafe with some change. Together they watched as people walked around the square, disturbing a small flock of doves, just going about their everyday lives, blissfully unaware of the forces at work, in a idyllic city that was the other end of the spectrum to what they knew growing up. Hikari finished her ice cream, and smiled at Juruo. “Thanks for that. I haven’t been able to do this for a long time, just sit around in the sun with friends. It’s nice to just do normal things, even if it is just for a little while.” Juruo nodded. “You’re right. If life could be like this every day for us, I could live happily with it. Hikari laid back against the stone steps, looking up towards the sky. “You know, we could forget all about Demon, let someone else deal with him, and just stay here like this forever. But we would never forgive ourselves if we did, would we?” She looked over at Juruo, he nodded seriously. “There is no-one else. But when Demon is defeated, then we can have times like this. We can have all the time in the world to make what we want of.” Hikari looked back to the sky, as a gull flew overhead. “I know. I hope we can have many days like this together.” Juruo stood , finishing his own dessert, and stretched. Looking down at Hikari, he was surprised to see she was still lying down, but had extended a gloved hand out to him. Visions of the night they had met flashed before him; the riot girl in bloody armour who had offered a handshake to a total stranger. He shook his head, they both knew what would happen if he held her hand. She remained however, stern-faced and refused to move otherwise. “It’s alright Juruo, take my hand.” Finally, trusting her word, Juruo did as she asked. Hikari grimaced at once, pain pulsing through her from the point of contact, but she did not break the hold until he had helped her to her feet. She smiled at him again, blushing slightly. In mutual silence, they set off. Eventually the sun dipped below the southern sea, and the pair returned to their lodgings. When they arrived, the others were already back and waiting for them in the room Sabin and Barakus would be sharing. The rooms were quite basic, with two single beds separated by a shared table, a wardrobe in the corner, and then a set of draws with some coffee making facilities on it. The choice of wallpaper was terribly mundane. Barakus was sitting on one bed, Mel was on the other. Erin and Sabin preferred to stand as they often did. Sabin had a frown etched deeply into his face, looking incredibly distracted. “Any luck?” Barakus asked, sitting on the edge of his bed with his head rested in his giant hands. Juruo shook his head. Barakus sighed; clearly his efforts had turned up just as little. “I looked round the governmental buildings all day, but couldn’t find anything. What about you Erin?” “Mel and I went through every book in the city library; there wasn’t a single mention of a legendary card of any kind ever existing here. Either we’ve got this horribly wrong, or the governing senate keep it a closely guarded secret, maybe even to themselves.” “What about you Sabin?” Juruo asked, turning everyone’s attention to the guy standing in the corner. “What’s that? Oh right me” Sabin jerked into attention at last. “No, no, I didn’t find anything.” Sabin looked out of the room window as he spoke, looking increasingly agitated. Juruo frowned, could Sabin make it any more obvious he was lying? “You know something, and you’re holding out on us. Stop being a selfish jerk, drop the attitude and spill.” Sabin snapped into focus, giving Juruo a threatening look. Sensing the tension, Barakus stood up and stepped between them. Although he had appeared to be a gentle giant throughout their time together, his stern gaze and imposing bulk were more than enough to diffuse any argument. Still, he couldn’t stop himself from stifling a loud yawn. “Enough of this. I think it’s time we all went to sleep, then hopefully tomorrow will be more productive.” ... Juruo was lost deep in his thought as he laid in his bath. The motel rooms all had a very basic on-suite that most residents would not be too impressed by. But for someone who had grown up in the slums of the capital all his life, before beginning this journey across the Empire having to sleep in abandoned farm houses and the wild, Juruo found a proper bath a blessed luxury. Bubbles caressed his aching flesh and weary bones, this was so relaxing, and a good time to just close your eyes and forget all the troubles for a few moments of peace. His brain was unwilling to let him have such a tranquil moment however and so, apparently, was Eternia. “Do not give up the search. What you are seeking is here in this city, but you must find it before your enemies do.” “Do you have to be so deliberately vague?” Still with his eyes shut, Juruo spoke to the air without thinking, decidedly annoyed that the voice chose to drop hints as opposed to being straight with him. “I cannot baby walk you through this, and nor should I need to, since one of your compatriots knows full well where the card is. If you are going to place such an emphasis on teamwork, then you need to truly unite your friends. Oh, and one more thing Juruo.” “Yes?” “Knock, knock.” Juruo jumped at the sound of a smart rapping at the door of the room, causing water to spill over the side of the bath. Well that wasn’t going to be Mel, who he was sharing the room with; he would just walk straight in. Taking great care not to slip on the floor, Juruo got out and hastily dried himself, put on some boxers and complimentary bathrobe, and went to answer the door to whoever this was. Erin stepped over the threshold without pause, looking around the drab room, before sitting herself down on one of the beds and resting her hands on a knee, waiting for Juruo to move. She seemed to have taken advantage of proper bathing facilities as well; she had straightened her flowing hair, and smelled of some kind of wild flowers. She had also removed her heavy blue cloak, which made her look a lot more petite without it over her small shoulders, despite her still being taller than he was. It was certainly a surprise for Juruo to see her like this, having grown so accustomed to her as a warrior general. He was slightly embarrassed to be standing before a fine woman in just a robe and underwear. “Hi Erin. You look... great. Just, er... give me a minute so I can get myself properly dressed...” “Sit down Juruo.” Juruo blinked at her curt interruption, as she motioned for him to sit beside her. Closing the front door, Juruo sat down as she had asked, and waited for her to say whatever she had come to speak to him about. Erin looked out into the distance in front of her in silence; maybe she didn’t really know what she was going to say herself. Juruo shifted, the silence was tense and awkward. At long last, Erin found her voice, but it was still somewhat fragmented as she chose her words. “I never thought it would happen like this. A part of me kind of hoped it would never happen, found it almost inconceivable. But there is another part of me, which is really glad it has.” Her words baffled him. Erin turned to look at him, staring deeply into his eyes. There was an odd sparkle in her piercing crystal blue eyes. Struggling for his own words, Juruo felt oddly conscious of his rising heart rate. “Thought what would happen?” Erin leaned closer towards him, placing a soft hand on his, her eyes still sinking into his heart and soul. She smiled, the largest smile he had ever seen from her, and all her fierceness and independence seemed to melt away as she whispered to him. “I’m in love with you.” With that, unable to hold herself back any longer, Erin put her arms around Juruo’s shoulders and kissed him. As her lips touched his, all senses went into overdrive. Her lips were so soft and, the feeling gave Juruo a rush like he’d had felt maybe only once before, he couldn’t remember when. After a few seconds, he withdrew slightly, shocked and panting heavily. Erin blinked, her eyes still sparkling, but she looked embarrassed. Mumbling something about ‘not making more of a fool of herself’, she motioned to leave. Juruo’s mind went into auto-pilot. Holding her hand, he gently pulled her back, urging her not to go. Their eyes met again as she turned back, amazement gone, he was ready now, he did want her. She sat back down, and allowed Juruo to put his hand on her face. Her skin was oddly cool to the touch, but touching her sent electricity through his entire body. The two kissed again, that certainly wasn’t cold; it was deep and passionate, as the pair held each other close. Less than six feet away from the love drunk couple, Hikari stood frozen, back pressed against the door. Silently, she moved on along the corridor to the other bedroom. As she passed a waste basket, a single rose dropped from her hand. ... A few hours later, Juruo woke up. That was strange; there didn’t seem any immediate reason for him to be awake. Then he realised, Decoy Dragon had appeared, it was sitting on the windowsill, looking at him inquisitively. Juruo smiled with embarrassment. “Do you mind pal?” he said as he playfully threw a sock at it, missing by some distance. Unperturbed, the dragon cocked its head towards the glass and cried slightly, urging his duelist companion to look at something. Sighing, Juruo looked down at the sleeping girl beside him. Erin was curled up against his body, peaceful and content. As he went to stand up however, she stirred, tightening her grip around his torso. “Don’t go, this is comfortable. I want to stay like this forever.” “I’ll be back in a second.” Juruo kissed her on the lips, which pleased her enough to let him go and do whatever it was he needed to. Stretching, Juruo walked over to the window where the small dragon was, it’s motions and cries becoming more frantic now. He looked out onto the moonlit city, down at the front garden of the motel below. He blinked, surely he was still asleep, that wasn’t what he thought. Yawning, he turned back to the waiting bed. Sensing it wasn’t being believed, and also no doubt jealous not to have his entire attention, the Decoy Dragon bit him on the hand. Juruo yelped, causing Erin to sit up, jumping and pulling the covers up as she saw the duel spirit at the window. Furious but now most definitely awake, Juruo followed the dragons frantic nodding and looked again, at the figure who was walking under a street light. Seconds passed as the sight sunk in. Forcing his body to move, Juruo grabbed his shirt and pulled it on, as the Decoy Dragon went to retrieve his other sock. Erin sat there, baffled at his sudden urgent rush. “Sorry Erin, but Sabin just left the motel. I think we had better follow him.” Erin blinked, but nodded in agreement. The pair dressed quickly, and left the room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted April 6, 2011 Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 I... suspected something like this might happen since quite earlier, but I didn't want to say anything yet. Romance, my friend, is a very iffy subject in fiction, and not because of reasons of lolmaturity. It's because it tends to create Mary Sues, where there would be none. It is unfortunate, but should be easily understood, that what you did - making Juruo the object of affection of not one, but two of the main female characters (so basically all of them), one of them with nothing but half a chapter's build-up, was... bad. It didn't sit down well with me at all. I was ok with the Hikari scenes since there was proper build-up and all, but Erin was totally out there, not to mention a big sense of OOC-ness. So... no, I'm not going to lie. This is just my view, but you messed up here, big time. This chapter was great, but the last two segments quite ruined it. Speaking of the last two segments, Eternia (which I assume is this Eternia, btw) seems... unnecessarily naughty. Still, it was a nice touch, I think. On the flip side, the rest of the chapter was good, I liked Yume as a character. Sabin is acting more and more strangely, which means he might be soon getting a chance at the spotlight, which is good, because he is now my incontestably favorite character, especially after that last chapter destroyed Erin. I... shouldn't have to say this, but if you ever feel the need to involve a third woman into Juruo's already complicated love life... don't >_>. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blademac Posted April 6, 2011 Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 I agree. The Hikari scenes were well done, but Erin's sudden interest strikes me as random and arbitrary. All in all, I love this story. I like most of what you've done, and you are one of the better fan fic writers I've read. I really liked the rose scene btw. Sabin is an interesting fellow, and I'm very interested in his back story. Finally, I was wondering if you would be willing to accept a deck idea for one of your future characters. A friend of mine plays Dragunity, and my deck seems to go toe to toe with it. I'd be interested to see how it does against Juruo. Thank you for writing this, I'm really enjoying it. P.S.Hikari reminds me very much of Rouge from X-men. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bahamut - Envoy of the End Posted April 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 I... suspected something like this might happen since quite earlier, but I didn't want to say anything yet. Romance, my friend, is a very iffy subject in fiction, and not because of reasons of lolmaturity. It's because it tends to create Mary Sues, where there would be none. It is unfortunate, but should be easily understood, that what you did - making Juruo the object of affection of not one, but two of the main female characters (so basically all of them), one of them with nothing but half a chapter's build-up, was... bad. It didn't sit down well with me at all. I was ok with the Hikari scenes since there was proper build-up and all, but Erin was totally out there, not to mention a big sense of OOC-ness. Aooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... Drat! And triple drat! Just looked up the def. of a Mary Sue, really gutted that image came across. I know Erin was showing a completely different side to her icy, independant manner. I did want to try and spring it on yous with just a few hints but still kinda unsuspected, probably too much so. Is it really impossible for her to like someone? Obviously I can't change it now so this never happened, and I'm not going to go 'but, but, but'. We'll just see how it plays out. So... no, I'm not going to lie. This is just my view, but you messed up here, big time. This chapter was great, but the last two segments quite ruined it. Speaking of the last two segments, Eternia (which I assume is this Eternia, btw) seems... unnecessarily naughty. Still, it was a nice touch, I think. On the flip side, the rest of the chapter was good, I liked Yume as a character. Sabin is acting more and more strangely, which means he might be soon getting a chance at the spotlight, which is good, because he is now my incontestably favorite character, especially after that last chapter destroyed Erin. I... shouldn't have to say this, but if you ever feel the need to involve a third woman into Juruo's already complicated love life... don't >_>. No, honesty is good, really. Eternia, naughty, really? How so? You may be pleased to know, especially in light of comments about characters going in and out, that Yuma will appear briefly in this arc again, but could be heavily involved in the third arc. All I'll say on her for now... Hopefully the Sabin centered (well it's obvious now ain't it) chapter on Friday shall redeem myself. Destroyed Erin... :( I'm gutted, but thanks for being honest and saying how you see it. I agree. The Hikari scenes were well done, but Erin's sudden interest strikes me as random and arbitrary. All in all, I love this story. I like most of what you've done, and you are one of the better fan fic writers I've read. I really liked the rose scene btw. Sabin is an interesting fellow, and I'm very interested in his back story. Finally, I was wondering if you would be willing to accept a deck idea for one of your future characters. A friend of mine plays Dragunity, and my deck seems to go toe to toe with it. I'd be interested to see how it does against Juruo. Thank you for writing this, I'm really enjoying it. P.S.Hikari reminds me very much of Rouge from X-men. Hey new commentor. Awesome. Glad you've enjoyed it so far. Second person out of two not liking Juruo-Erin, hmmmm. Only two days to wait... Regarding decks, always willing to discover new cards, and strategies, and put in as many different playing styles as possible. I have already listed the seven-eight duels that are going to take place in Arc Three (that's probably bad of me) only need to think up one or two decks now, neither of which is facing Juruo. Thanks for commenting. PS: Rogue, honestly never made the connection myself, but I can see where you are coming from. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vector Nightmare Posted April 6, 2011 Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 Aooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... Drat! And triple drat! Just looked up the def. of a Mary Sue, really gutted that image came across. I know Erin was showing a completely different side to her icy, independant manner. I did want to try and spring it on yous with just a few hints but still kinda unsuspected, probably too much so. Is it really impossible for her to like someone? No, not impossible, but with what you've shown us so far, her sudden outburst was quite... eh... uncharacteristic of her. Do you know that feeling when you watch a show with two characters who have never shown any romantic interest in each other then go read a fanfic and they're suddenly all lovey-dovey... yeah, that's sort of the vibe I got there. Eternia, naughty, really? How so? Well, that... Oh, and one more thing Juruo.” “Yes?” “Knock, knock.” Felt... unnecessarily out-of-place in such a conversation. Like... forced comedy, or whatever. You may be pleased to know, especially in light of comments about characters going in and out, that Yuma will appear briefly in this arc again, but could be heavily involved in the third arc. All I'll say on her for now... Hopefully the Sabin centered (well it's obvious now ain't it) chapter on Friday shall redeem myself. Destroyed Erin... :( I'm gutted, but thanks for being honest and saying how you see it. It's not quite irreversible, you can still work it out somehow if you handle it well from now on. Hey new commentor. Awesome. Glad you've enjoyed it so far. Second person out of two not liking Juruo-Erin, hmmmm. No. I'm not disliking Juruo-Erin. If you asked me, I'd say Juruo-Erin and Sabin-Hikari would probably be how I'd want things to end up (if there had to be some sort of relationships going around, at least). The problem is that we only got the mildest of hints that Erin had even the slightest romantic interest in Juruo, if they can even be called that, and no hints at all that Juruo felt the same for Erin. It just... came out of nowhere. Hikari and Juruo felt much more natural, and if something had happened between the two at this point I would not complain about it, but for Juruo and Erin... it was too random, too sudden, and that suddenness did not fit either of their characters at all. Also, when Gear was revealed I had assumed he was the Machine user that had attacked Pallas' mansion. Then again Karakuri's aren't exactly the big, rampaging machines one might have in mind. Plus I do think someone specifically wanted to set Sabin up (or at least set the Resistance group up), and it did not make sense for Demon and his allies to hand them the card just to retrieve it a bit later. So yeah, I think that's the most interesting plot point at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blademac Posted April 6, 2011 Report Share Posted April 6, 2011 If I understand the scene correctly, the "knock, knock" was Erin interupting the conversation and not Eternia saying "knock, knock." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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