[Written] Burgesstoma Gamalekeos

[Aman Indra]

Burgesstoma Gamalekeos

WATER/Aqua/Xyz/Effect

Rank 5

2600 ATK / 2000 DEF

2 Level 5 WATER monsters

You can also Xyz Summon this card once per turn by discarding a card from your Hand and using a "Burgesstoma" Xyz monster you control as an Xyz material except "Burgesstoma Gamalekeos". (Xyz Materials attached to that monster also become Xyz Materials on this card.) Unaffected by other monster's effects. As long as this card is Face-up on the field; Monster(s) Special Summoned by your Opponent from the Extra deck cannot activate their effects the turn they are Summoned. Once per turn, during either player's turn, if this card has a Trap Card as an Xyz Material: You can detach an Xyz material from this card; Add 1 "Burgesstoma" Trap card from your Graveyard to your Hand, if you do, Target 1 card in your opponent's Graveyard; Banish it.

[Magmacore_Soldier]

Burgesstoma Gamalekeos

WATER/Aqua/Xyz/Effect

Rank 5

2600 ATK / 2000 DEF

2 Level 5 WATER monsters

You can also Xyz Summon this card once per turn by discarding a card from your Hand and using a "Burgesstoma" Xyz monster you control as an Xyz material except "Burgesstoma Gamalekeos". (Xyz Materials attached to that monster also become Xyz Materials on this card.) Unaffected by other monster's effects. As long as this card is Face-up on the field; Monster(s) Special Summoned by your Opponent from the Extra deck cannot activate their effects the turn they are Summoned. Once per turn, during either player's turn, if this card has a Trap Card as an Xyz Material: You can detach an Xyz material from this card; Add 1 "Burgesstoma" Trap card from your Graveyard to your Hand, if you do, Target 1 card in your opponent's Graveyard; Banish it.

Hmm...A Chaos Xyz Change for Burgesstomas...Not a bad idea but what the heck is a Gamalekeos (most of the Burgesstomas are named for uber-prehistoric sea creatures)?

[Darj]

Not sure if Burgesstomas really need this. Wouldn't this be more of an overkill card to give them?

Also, the detach effect doesn't target the Trap Card, was that intended or not?

 

Anyway, the text on the last effect is off: You cannot start a chain/effect at the middle of the resolution of an effect, which is what, because of the way it's written, the effect is attempting to do. For it to work properly, I suggest 2 options:

1. Keep it simple and remove the targeting clause on the banishment effect, effectively making it non-targeting:

Once per turn, during either player's turn, if this card has a Trap Card as an Xyz Material: You can detach 1 Xyz material from this card; Add 1 "Burgesstoma" Trap card from your Graveyard to your hand, if you do, Target 1 card in your opponent's Graveyard; banish 1 card in your opponent's Graveyard.

 

2. If you don't want the banish effect to not target for whatever reason (to keep it fair, etc.), then make it start a new chain once the recovery effect resolves:

 

Once per turn, during either player's turn, if this card has a Trap Card as an Xyz Material: You can detach 1 Xyz material from this card; Add 1 "Burgesstoma" Trap card from your Graveyard to your Hand. Once per turn, during either player's turn, if you added a "Burgesstoma" Trap card to your hand by this card's effect: Target 1 card in your opponent's Graveyard; banish it.

[Timeskipper]

First, the flavor is off: all of the Burgesstoma cards are named after fossils of sea creatures of the Cambrian period, found in the Burgess Shale Formation, and at least according to Wikipedia, there is none called "gamalekeos". A creature that hasn't been used in the series yet would be the Odontogriphus (though it certainly doesn't look as threatening as Anomalocarys, and certainly not chaos Xyz evolution material), or Orthrozanclus, or Waptia, or Sidneyia, or Yohoia. None is really appropriate since the apex predator of the Burgess Shale was the ginormous Anomalocarys, but hey, can't have everything.

 

Second, the rank is weird. It's the evolution of a Rank 2 monster. Why is it Rank 5?

 

As for the effect, it's decent. I'd say you can dump the summon requirement of discarding one card. It's not that dangerous, after all, and the stats are only marginally better than Anomalocarys. For now, I'd say it's too weak, but it's a start. Why not make it able to recycle banished Burgesstomas, for example?