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Final Rant/Thoughts/Goodbyes


King K. Azo

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So, I have pretty much wrapped up most loose ends. So, I will post some farewell thoughts before I retreat to the RP section, and finally, completely off the site. For a while. I might be back, who knows? But, so I don’t explode in real life, I will now fill out my thoughts on some key people on this site.

 

Let’s start.

 

First off, Zai. Look, people have the wrong idea. I don’t hate you, in fact, you’re pretty fun to talk to when the talk isn’t about RP. And I also don’t mind you are a mod. I wish you the best in the endeavor. I still don't think you’re a good RP mod, but whatever.

 

However, that doesn’t mean I can’t be annoyed with you. You have the attention span of a goldfish, and you keep trying to start new ideas when you haven’t even finished your first ones. This is why I am very hesitant to let you write a script for me. I don’t think I’d get it in ten years. And then there is the fact it feels like you ignore advice, and also ignore ideas given to you, and try to come back later claiming them as your own. I know this because you’ve done this to me, a lot.

 

However, that’s not what bugs me most about you. What bugs me most is the f***ing Zai Defense Squad you have. They f***ing believe that you are perfect, and any criticism towards you is automatically wrong, and they must attack the one that dares to try to sully your name.

 

This makes you unapproachable, and honestly, I have to think for days or get to a boiling point before I can muster up the courage to say f*** it, and speak anything negative towards you. This isn’t a good thing, and you should try to have your Defense Squad let up. It’ll be hard enough to approach a mod, so one that has a gang that will bully people will make it so no one besides people that are already good friends will approach you. Not a very good position for a PR mod.

 


 

Oh boy, Yui, do I have a rant for you. Thing is, you probably won’t see this, since you’re avoiding me like I kill your lolis. But that isn’t going to stop me from ranting and asking… What. The. f***ing. Hell?

 

I mean, we had some rough patches. Rape flashbacks, yada yada, but I mostly got over it. We were good friends to. Hell, my girlfriend went to you to ask advice on a birthday present for me, and I was saving money to get a present for you.

 

But then, because I disagreed with Zai being an RP mod, not even calling for him to get fired, just not become RP mod, you called me a c***. What. The. f***? I wasn’t threatening Zai or anything, I just had a difference of opinion and you go and call me that.

 

Maybe if it was just some random jackass calling me a c***, I’d be fine, but it was you, someone I had trust in, someone I was close friends with. You shattered me that day. I nearly broke down weeping at work because of that.

 

And if you try to say you didn't call me one, I’ll just say you made a horrible attempt distancing me from the ones you believed are c***s, since you described me in the Skype chat the same way you described those you called c***s.

 

You are, in fact, the straw that broke the camel’s back and made me realized I need to get off this site.

 

If all you did was call me a c***, I’d probably get over it. But then, in a moment of weakness, I went to apologize, hoping you’d forgive me and we’d move on. What did I get?

 

f***ing. Nothing. Not even a response.

 

And it’s not like you don’t know what you put me through. You saw in the chats, you know I came to ask you for forgiveness, you know you put me through rape flashbacks. And I didn’t get a word from you. Not even a “No, I won’t forgive you,”. You just started acting like I didn’t exist.

 

I don’t know what you think of me anymore, and maybe that’s for the better. I trusted you way too much and paid the price with a shattered heart and soul. If you think less of me now, I probably couldn’t take it.

 


 

Now, let’s move on to people I regret not being able to get closer to. First, there’s Giga/Parentheses/whatever that symbol is. I dunno, you seem like a cool guy, and the time you acted as Riddler was really amazing. Those puzzles were something else. I just wish I had more of a spine to try to become friends.

 

The same goes for Black, honestly. You did an awesome job at the Halloween gig, and you seem very insightful and smart. I just wish I had more of a spine to try to talk to you.

 


 

Now let’s end on positive notes. First, Chaos Sonic, you’re a great friend. Thanks for putting up with my weird Yugioh decks, and weird ideas I bounce off of ya. I really look up to you as an rper, and I’m glad we got to become friends.

 

Faytl, you’re also awesome. You got great ideas, and you’re knowledgeable in the game, much more than I. I also love reading your if a, and I reiterate, I demand to know when you update.

 

Skaia, you make awesome characters. You’re also genuinely funny, and I can’t count the amount of times you’ve made me laugh. You still also hold the honor of making my favorite character in Forsaken Legends, so there’s that.

 

Cowcow, I might have tried to rear my horns for stupid reasons, but you are by far my favorite host of my favorite RP. I’ve learned a lot under you, and think I’ve finally started to refine my RP style because of you.

 

Bosseon. You are my second favorite host, the only reason you’re not tied is because those 3 or so months without you, which was beyond your control. You make great characters, and you are a genuine joy to talk to. I just wish we could do it more.

 

Hyde, you might be weird, but you’re a great friend. You’re the host of my second favorite RP, and you’re probably only second because we haven’t hit 40 pages yet.

 

And finally Hollow. You’re my art buddy, and I love talking to you. I wish we could RP together more.

 

And that’s all I have. So, for now, good bye everyone.

 

 

 

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Hit me up on discord or skype, or PM me for it. I'm not around a ton right now, and I'm honestly shy as funk in a non-group setting (and many of those), but feel free to talk to me, I've no issues with that.

 

I'll read all of this when I have time, just had a feeling I'd pop up. Shocked it was so positive.

 

EDIT: oh I was tagged whoops

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I figured I'd be mentioned here so I decided to come have a look, and I'd like to clarify a few things.

 

I don't single out one person then refer to them alone as "jabroni"; I always save the word for a broader spectrum of people (in this case, folks against Zai's modhood (and in retrospect I do realize I hadn't payed much attention to my misinterpretation of what all was going on from your end)). In the context of the rant - something I'll happily admit I worded far more strongly than I ever word things (pretty sure it's the first time I've used the word jabroni with any sort of malice) - I'd have called you a jabroni just as much as say, Parenthesis. If the pleas for forgiveness were in a chat I would likely have missed them, and if they were directly sent to my inbox I did actually miss them, but I won't think less of you for any of this. Things have been rocky lately between us - especially given you've slowly had the stress of game development, RPing, and also YCM drama to deal with piling up - so it's only natural things like this happen sometimes. But I'd like to get right to my point before I start rambling; I can feel the ramble coming.

 

Bottom line, if being away from YCM is what you need to lower the stress you're taking in the real world, do it by all means. It's become clear lately that you need to breathe a bit, so cut the stressful things you can cut, take some time to figure things out if you have to, and overall do what you must. And if that means you really don't come back (I doubt it; everyone comes back at least twice), well it's been a pleasure RPing with you. And because I'm feeling a bit cheesy, I'll close this up with my favorite inspirational quote; it might help you a bit.

 

"The darker the night, the brighter the stars."

-Braum, League of Legends

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Well damn...I'm tearing up because of that Sai...T~T

 

Honestly, I'll say it now...your the first person (to my knowledge) who's said they look up to me as an RPer. To me, it means a lot...sure it probably doesn't to anyone else, but I feel like I at least accomplished something on this forum. And I'll be totally honest, when I first met you in Grimm Nights, lets be honest...you were a noob and in my RP. Technically didn't take toooooooooo kindly to seeing someone of that many stars in it XD

 

But after that and the fact that we ended up RPing even more together, you've literally become a friend that is just pretty awesome. I've had a lot of friends on this forum, and right now...your on the top of that list....not sure what spot on that list...but your up there!

 

I'll do what I can to continue on with Forsaken Legends...and when you come back, it'll be waiting for you buddy. So will those in the RP section. Heh, you've already joined the ranks...you can't retire yet...not if I say anything about it ;D

 

*pumps fist into the air* So chase the wind, young Sai! And one day, I hope to see you return. You know where to hit me up...

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It's a shame to see you go, dood. Hope to catch you on Skype at some point.

... I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING. I'm sorry bro. You know what you are? A good friend, someone fun to talk to, and a fellow lover of Buster Blader. I hope we do talk some.

 

I figured I'd be mentioned here so I decided to come have a look, and I'd like to clarify a few things.

 

I don't single out one person then refer to them alone as "c***"; I always save the word for a broader spectrum of people (in this case, folks against Zai's modhood (and in retrospect I do realize I hadn't payed much attention to my misinterpretation of what all was going on from your end)). In the context of the rant - something I'll happily admit I worded far more strongly than I ever word things (pretty sure it's the first time I've used the word c*** with any sort of malice) - I'd have called you a c*** just as much as say, Parenthesis. If the pleas for forgiveness were in a chat I would likely have missed them, and if they were directly sent to my inbox I did actually miss them, but I won't think less of you for any of this. Things have been rocky lately between us - especially given you've slowly had the stress of game development, RPing, and also YCM drama to deal with piling up - so it's only natural things like this happen sometimes. But I'd like to get right to my point before I start rambling; I can feel the ramble coming.

 

Bottom line, if being away from YCM is what you need to lower the stress you're taking in the real world, do it by all means. It's become clear lately that you need to breathe a bit, so cut the stressful things you can cut, take some time to figure things out if you have to, and overall do what you must. And if that means you really don't come back (I doubt it; everyone comes back at least twice), well it's been a pleasure RPing with you. And because I'm feeling a bit cheesy, I'll close this up with my favorite inspirational quote; it might help you a bit.

 

"The darker the night, the brighter the stars."

-Braum, League of Legends

I'm sorry it took this. I'm glad to know it's a misunderstanding. Let's just give each other space for awhile. Two steadfast forces rubbing against each other can't be good, after all.

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... I KNEW I FORGOT SOMETHING. I'm sorry bro. You know what you are? A good friend, someone fun to talk to, and a fellow lover of Buster Blader. I hope we do talk some.

Don't worry fam, it's alright. :3

 

And thanks for the kind words, they mean a lot to me. <3

 

Just in case you have Discord and I haven't added you yet for some reason, I'll send you a PM where we can exchange tags. Mostly because I can call people on Discord but not Skype for some reason.

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I'm sorry it took this. I'm glad to know it's a misunderstanding. Let's just give each other space for awhile. Two steadfast forces rubbing against each other can't be good, after all.

It's all good. Get your space that you need; I'm not going anywhere anytime soon so I'll be here whenever you are. Best of luck in your real-world adventure (=w=)/

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Two steadfast forces rubbing against each other 

 

First of all, that's nasty.

 

Second of all, I don't know you well.  But I've already made my peace with you via your last thread.  Just wanted to reiterate that I wish you the best and I hope you find the recovery you need.  Good luck, and you're obviously welcome back anytime.

 

If I'm still around, I hope to rp with you.

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