[OLD VERSION] Yugioh - STARS [Discontinued]

[Mintywater]

Mhm. It's like, think of it this way; lore-wise, your character would've received the STARS card not very long ago; but as it stands, it's clearly obvious your Deck can't even stand with the STARS card, much less without it. How would she have got anything done with that Deck before she received that STARS card? And even then, her Deck seems so full of low-strength Monsters excluding her STARS that she would have a problem beating anything without it. I find this extra odd, because I believe when you described the archetype it was something like this; 

"An archetype of weak-looking Monsters with powerful effects"

Yet, I believe none of them except the STARS even have effects, unless your considering the Pendulums. Even then, they're....Eh. 

 

On a side note, Libracor, PMed you the info you needed. 

[Eritzap]

What me concerns I feel my deck is playable as it stands. But I'm open to listen to better ideas to change it.

[Mintywater]

Sure, it's playable, but there's still the lore problem of the fact that this deck obviously relies heavily on it's STARS card, which the character wouldn't have had until recently, making it put into serious question how the Deck even managed to function prior to it; take for example, my OC's Deck, the Brutal Warriors. It would be clear to anyone that even without Orgoth, the Deck was strong enough to be it's own major threat, but Orgoth's arrival improved it even further; that's how a STARS Monster should be. Not the primary focus of the entire archetype upon that single Monster, but simply a very welcome addition to the archetype that, while you would be fine without it, is a huge asset. 

On another note, Libracor....When are you revealing some information about this Daniel fellow I voted to hear about? No one else has said anything about it, but....Yeah. :p 

[Libracor]

Even then, if you're going to support Tribute monsters, you should have more than one in your deck, and you need more abilities that specifically support those summons. Otherwise it's impractical and unfocused.

[Eritzap]

You didn't seem to have looked again at the deck, since it has now a deck-size (over 40), and has plenty of monster to Tribute Summon.

[Libracor]

But you have no way of searching, supporting, recovering, or comboing with any of them.

[Mintywater]

And besides your STARS, all of them are random Fairies. :/ 

[Eritzap]

Well, I have honestly no idea how to improve on what I've got.

[Mintywater]

First of all, I'd get rid of those random and pointless generic Fairies and make some tribute summonable Tear cards that aren't your STARS. 

[Libracor]

Secondly, you don't need generic effects like burn damage, so replace some of those with effects that benefit you when you use them as Tribute.

[)e//!s0P]

Libiracor did you forget about my AP? I would like feedback plz

[Libracor]

I'm really sorry! I did forget. You're AP is accepted, but it'll be a day or two before I'll be able to update the post.

[0PxPz0]

so what's going on with my second app?

[spoiler=The Hero's counterpart] 

Name: Hikara Yūrei

Gender: Female
Age: 19
[spoiler=Appearance] 

around the same height and build as her brother, she wears pastel sweaters and self made woven hats

 

[spoiler=Personality] While she's equally as shy as Hiro she's able to overcome her social anxieties and put on a facade of a cheery disposition. She'll often be the one to initiate a duel, usually with her brother watching, in hopes of seeing new cards which get's her very excited. Unlike Hiro she doesn't have an issue in her dueling confidence and loves meeting someone she can't seem to beat just so she can form a new strategy to best them. If it weren't for her insistence on constantly trying to include her brother Hikara would be far more popular among duelists her age.

 

[spoiler=Backstory] Just like her brother their parents tried to get her into dueling to help her out at school however it seemed to work in her case, she became enthralled with the game and helped her brother make his "Phantom HERO" deck, promising him they'd be duel rivals and that he'd always be her only worthy opponent. though she made a ton of friends through dueling she abandoned most of them in favor of Hiro despite his indifferent nature to most people. Soon after people started avoiding both the twins socially and only really dueled with Hikara while Hiro would watch and record.

 

[spoiler=Deck] Despite her seemingly light hearted nature Hikara uses the small burn heavy "Umbra" archetype mixed in with other Dark support and generic burn and protection cards

[spoiler=Custom Cards] 

[spoiler=Umbra Cards]

Umbra Essence

(Warrior/Dark/Lvl 1/ATK 0/DEF 0)

"When your opponent declares an attack or an "Umbra" monster you control leaves the field you can Special Summon this card. your opponent cannot attack until the endphase after this card is summoned. You can tribute this card, add one "Umbra" card from your deck or graveyard to your hand."

 

Umbra The False Light

(Warrior/Dark/Lvl 4/ATK 0/DEF 0)

"When this card is summoned, Special Summon as many "Umbra the False Light" as possible from your hand, deck, or graveyard. Each time your opponent takes damage by the effect of an "Umbra" card this card gains 200 ATK. If an "Umbra" monster is removed from the field inflict 50 damage to your opponent."

 

Umbra The Dark Herald

(Warrior/Dark/Lvl 6/ATK 0/DEF 0)

"This card cannot be Normal Summon/Set and can only be Special Summoned (from the hand) by tributing one "Umbra" monster. When this card is summoned add one "Umbra" monster from your deck or graveyard to your hand. If this card declares an attack against a monster with higher ATK or DEF than this cards ATK negate that attack and inflict damage to your opponent equal to half the damage you would have taken, This card gains ATK and DEF equal to the damage dealt by this effect."

 

Umbra the Falling Sun

(Warrior/Dark/Lvl 8/ATK ?/DEF ?)

"This card cannot be Normal Summon/Set and can only be summoned by it's own effect. While your Life Points are lower than your opponents you can Special Summon this card (from the hand), inflict damage to your opponent equal to the difference then this cards original ATK and DEF become equal to the damage dealt. Once per turn you can discard one card, inflict 100 damage to your opponent then this card gains 100 ATK and DEF."

 

Umbra's Shadow Spear

Spell

"Choose one;

- Destroy on monster on the field, inflict 500 damage to your opponent.

- Discard up to three cards then target the same number of cards on the field, destroy those cards.

- Pay 1000 Life points, destroy all monsters on the field, both players take damage equal to the number of destroyed monsters X100.

Immediately after one of this cards effects resolves, Special summon this card as an an effect monster (Warrior-Type/Dark/Lvl 3/ATK 0/DEF 0) with this effect "This cards ATK is equal to the damage dealt to a player by one of this cards effects."

 

Umbra's Ghost Sword

Equip Spell

"Equip only to an "Umbra" monster, pay any amount of Life Points, the equipped monster gains ATK equal to the amount payed. If the equipped monster is destroyed, Special summon this card as an an effect monster (Warrior-Type/Dark/Lvl 5/ATK 0/DEF 0) with this effect "This cards ATK is equal to the ATK the equipped monster gained.""

 

Umbra's Midnight Armor

Trap

"Activate when your opponent declares an attack against an "Umbra" monster, that monster cannot be destroyed by battle or card effects until the endphase and your opponent takes damage equal to half the ATK of the attacking monster. Immediately after this cards effects resolves, Special summon this card as an effect monster (Warrior-Type/Dark/Lvl 3/ATK 0/DEF 0) with this effect "This cards DEF is equal to the damage dealt to a player by this cards effects.""

 

Umbra's Eternal Shield

Continuous Trap

"Pay any amount of Life Points, "Umbra" monsters cannot be destroyed by battle with monsters with equal or less ATK than the amount payed. If this card is destroyed, Special summon it as an effect monster (Warrior-Type/Dark/Lvl 5/ATK 0/DEF 0) with this effect "This cards DEF is equal to the amount of life points payed for it's effect.""

 

[spoiler=Generic Cards] 

Devourer of Sins

(Fiend/Dark/Lvl 7/ATK 0/DEF 0)

"Once per turn, while there is no card equipped to this monster, equip this card with one DARK monster you control, this card gains that monsters ATK and DEF. If this card would be destroyed, destroy the equipped monster instead. If this card battles a non-DARK monster destroy that monster before the damage step and gain life points equal to half the destroyed monsters ATK."

 

Impius the Unforgiving

(Fiend/Dark/Lvl 7/ATK ?/DEF ?)

"This card cannot be Normal Summon/Set. When a monster you control leaves the field you can special summon this card (from the hand), this cards ATK and DEF become double that of the removed monster. when this card is removed from the field inflict damage to your opponent equal to half this cards ATK. This card cannot attack directly."

 

Painful Pleasure

Continuous Spell

"Each time you take damage from a card effect activate one of the following effect, if that card effect is from a card you control activate both effects instead;

- inflict damage to your opponent equal to the damage you took.

- regain life points equal to half the damage you took."

 

Death of the Hero

Trap

"When your opponent destroys the monster you control with the highest ATK, destroy the monster you opponent controls with the highest ATK (choose if tied)."

 

Sacrificial Lamb

Counter Trap

"Tribute on monster you control to apply one of the following effects:

- Destroy one card on the field

- Negate the activation of a Spell/Trap card and destroy it

- Gain Life Points equal to half of the tributed monsters ATK"

 

 

STARS CARD

*SM Umbra, the Eternal Night

(Warriror/Dark/Lvl 10/0/0)

"This card cannot be Normal Summon/Set and can only be summoned by it's own effect. You can Special Summon this card from your hand by tributing one or more "Umbra" monsters. When this card is summoned inflict damage to your opponent equal to the combined Levels of the tributed monsters x100, this card gains ATK and DEF equal to the damage dealt. This card cannot be destroyed while it's ATK or DEF is higher than 1500."

 

[spoiler=Misc] The "Umbra" cards are based off a villain of the Phantom HERO's in their comic books which is why Hikara uses them. Her favorite card to use against Hiro is the trap card "Death of the Hero" for obvious reasons.

 

 

[Libracor]

I was waiting to see how many more APs I'd get. I wanted to make sure that I didn't bite off more than I could chew you know? Be that as it may, what were you planning for your second character?

[Eritzap]

I completely reworked the archetype, and think I got something better.

(here)

[Libracor]

Make Burning tears gain half atk and def or nerf its starting stats and you're good.

[0PxPz0]

I was waiting to see how many more APs I'd get. I wanted to make sure that I didn't bite off more than I could chew you know? Be that as it may, what were you planning for your second character?

as far as what i intend to do in the Rp or . . .?

[The Frost King]

I can't wait for this RP to get started

[Mintywater]

Same. This RP is gonna be hype. :D 

 

Also, 0P, I think he's asking what your intentions are for the character role-wise. Possibly. That's what I interpret with it...

[Libracor]

I have a good idea to fit OP's second character, can you PM me?

[Libracor]

OP's second Application has been accepted. Again, I'll update the main post when I get to my computer.

[Libracor]

Does anyone here have prior experience with RPing on this site?

[)e//!s0P]

Does anyone here have prior experience with RPing on this site?

yes

[Eritzap]

Does anyone here have prior experience with RPing on this site?

It would be my first time roleplaying on this very forums, but I'm experienced at roleplaying on other forums.

[The Frost King]

Does anyone here have prior experience with RPing on this site?

 

Yes. I'm in 3 other RP's at the moment (although I think 1 of them is dead).