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Marriage


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#1
Iron Fusion

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So this marriage thing, are you interested in getting married one day?

I have a friend who's getting married and moving to another country to settle down with her, which is crazy cuz he's my age. Someone else in my high school class just got married too.

 

It seems the divorce rate in America's currently hovering somewhere between 40-50%, lot of sources saying different things. Do you believe in the construct of marriage, is it for you or not for you personally, where do you stand on it?


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#2
Tsumugi Shirogane

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I definitely want to be married.

 

I've wanted it my whole life. And I haven't grown disillusioned with it, despite seeing tons of divorce. Some people are just horrible people. Others simply weren't ready for the committment that a relationship truly entails. A lot of marriages happen based on the passion and "in love" feeling, and that doesn't work.


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#3
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#4
Usami Rainko

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Love, of course I want that. Marriage, I don't know. I mean, you don't need to be married to live together, or have kids technically. As much as I like the religion I'm not Christian either.

 

My only problem with divorce is that divorce laws sound scary, especially for the guy.


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#5
Thomas Zero

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Love, of course I want that. Marriage, I don't know. I mean, you don't need to be married to live together, or have kids technically. As much as I like the religion I'm not Christian either.
 
My only problem with divorce is that divorce laws sound scary, especially for the guy.


Sounds like someone would rather have friends with benefits ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

OT: I myself am not sure specially after you see all the drama's and movies regarding relationships with include affairs, divorces, crazy schemes and murders and do not get me started about Yandere's with things like Mirai Nikki being a thing.

To be honest being single makes you feel like you got some form of freedom for yourself to do what you want in some sense.
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#6
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Yeah, I plan on getting married and having kids. But whether that'll happen or not depends if I find someone who I can put up with (and preferably not like my parents lately; least with one of them complaining nearly daily), also if I have the resources to sustain it. 

 

(You know, find someone who likes me for who I am and not because of my money, because divorce laws are skewed in favor of the woman.)

 

Eventually, but definitely not at this time.

 

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Then again, one of my high school classmates got married recently (she's five months older than me), but...she isn't in the best of career paths so I can't say how long she can handle it.


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#7
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Sounds like someone would rather have friends with benefits ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)OT: I myself am not sure specially after you see all the drama's and movies regarding relationships with include affairs, divorces, crazy schemes and murders and do not get me started about Yandere's with things like Mirai Nikki being a thing.To be honest being single makes you feel like you got some form of freedom for yourself to do what you want in some sense.

Movies and anime are not an accurate depiction of relationships. I thought this went without saying, but guess not.

Marriage is definitely something that sounds nice, and I would like it quite a lot. That said, I wouldn't say it is one of the things I'm striving for. Falling for someone because you are looking to fall for someone is just conflating your own emotions. I'd much prefer a relationship that happens without planning, so I don't plan these things ahead.

As a final note, based on some comments here, love and relationships are different for everyone. Anyone who claims to "know better" is just trying to sell their own ideology.

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#8
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I don't plan on getting married ever. I mean to be fair, I don't even have a girlfriend, so to me it's kinda pointless to think about getting married when I know I'm not gonna get a girlfriend anytime soon.


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#9
Sebi Evalon

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I have a girlfriend, but I'm in high school, and everyone I talk to tells me it won't last. I however would like to think otherwise. I guess it's one of those, "The best kind of revenge is proving them wrong" scenarios...

 

But, that in mind, I always start a relationship with Marriage in mind. Tbh, I think there is no point in trying if you don't think you'll ever get married. It will just hurt the other person eventually, and possibly hurt you too. So yes, I am FOR the idea of Marriage.


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#10
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My only problem with divorce is that divorce laws sound scary, especially for the guy.

 

They sure are. My uncle was slammed into a max security prison earlier in the year resulting from a paperwork miscue in a vicious custody battle that's spanned almost two decades. Some Kafkaesque bullshit, but as real as penitentiary steel. In fact, all six of my aunts/uncles are divorced, as well as my own parents.  

 

Divorce rates are absurdly high nowadays in the decaying decadent west, and where kids are involved it's particularly gruesome. If I were to get married it'd have to be a pretty weird and open marriage, and it probably wouldn't last. I like strangers and I like them a lot. On that note I've actually been engaged before but it was causing my parents grief and eventually after some gnashing of teeth we agreed to call the engagement off and go our separate unmarried ways. 

 

I'd like to get married many times, that's what fun people do! Like William Shatner and the late great Zsa Zsa Gabor!



#11
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I'm out of college and in a relationship so it's definitely a possibility. 

 

Current biggest obstacle to be getting married is my never ending anxiety.  Tenta no like commitment.


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#12
Iron Fusion

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It's interesting to see the variety in stances on it here, much like my different circles of friends in real life.

 

I think I do believe in the concept of marriage and would like to one day, but realize it's not for everyone. My aunt never married and was completely content with herself, whereas my uncle divorced from an unhappy marriage and remained so until recently with a new girlfriend, like he's a new man.

I also have a friend whose parents divorced a couple years ago and everyone was relieved for it, both moved on to a new relationship and are happier now.

And my mom's friend has been married a couple times, and is feeling more content now being single.

My parents have been dysfunctionally, but happily married for 34 years now.

 

Like ( ) said, relationships are different for everyone, and each relationship is unique in its own way. My stance is I'd like to get married, but would never press someone into getting married.


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#13
The Nyx Avatar

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Me personally, I'd like to get married one day. Sure, there's the possibility of divorce, but I'm still willing. I swear there are some legal benefits of marriage too, but they can differ through countries and I can't really put them into words. Tax reduction maybe?

Oddly, only one of my family members/relatives has ever divorced. And he remarried years later.

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#14
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I very much want to get married someday. That said, I've made it a point that I will only get married once in my life, and if that relationship fails, then it isn't worth going through the process again. It should be a special and significant event in my life, and hopefully it will be my longest and final relationship.

Its really not for everyone though, and unless you're truly prepared for that kind of commitment, its best not to be wed. Makes things much easier.

PSA: Get a pre-nuptual agreement or else.


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#15
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I very much want to get married someday. That said, I've made it a point that I will only get married once in my life, and if that relationship fails, then it isn't worth going through the process again. It should be a special and significant event in my life, and hopefully it will be my longest and final relationship.

Its really not for everyone though, and unless you're truly prepared for that kind of commitment, its best not to be wed. Makes things much easier.

PSA: Get a pre-nuptual agreement or else.

 

Ducks can't get married legally in the United States.

 

 

I wanna get married but not until I'm out of school.  I wanna prioritize my education right now and I'm hoping that when I do get married I can have something long lasting and successful like the lengthy 55 years of marriage my grandmother and grandfather had.


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#16
Yui

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I'm mostly just here to rep Zai's post but now that I'm here, I should drop my stance on marriage.

 

There are people out there who are well-suited for relationships, and really want one. I am not one of those people. I don't really find the concept of marriage necessary either; if two people truly love each other, a ring and some legal ceremonies don't really make them love each other any more or less, does it? Not to mention divorce can be a pretty spooky thing, especially for the husband (me in this case), as Mitcher pointed out. If you break up with your girlfriend, y'all just grab your shit and go your seperate ways, and figure out what you're doing with any possible kids. If you break up with your wife, there's gotta be a big thing in court about it and you'll probably lose a lot of stuff that actually is yours. Plus, marriage is expensive! Those rings ain't cheap, and I'm not about to invest that kind of money in a relationship that I'm not 100% absolutely certain will last for the rest of my life.

 

Which is probably no relationship ever. I think me and some friends were discussing this on skype a while back and I brought up some similar points and they were just like "naw you just haven't met the one yet yui" and I definitely haven't, but unless I do meet "the one" (I'm not ruling out the possibility of never meeting said one), my stance on the matter probably won't shift anytime soon. Marriage is great for some people and I respect them for their commitment, but it's not for me.


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