[Post-Contest Review] Dopenguin

[Armoire]

[spoiler=Lore]If you control a "Penguin" monster, you can Special Summon this card from your hand. While you control another monster, this card cannot be attacked. The first time each other "Penguin" monster you control would be destroyed by battle each turn, it is not destroyed. Once per turn (Quick Effect): You can target 1 "Penguin" monster you control; change that target to face-down Defense Position. You can only control 1 "Dopenguin".

 

 

 

[spoiler=Original Effect]If you control a "Penguin" monster, you can Special Summon this card from your hand. While you control another monster, this card cannot be attacked. Other "Penguin" monsters you control cannot be destroyed by battle. During either player's turn: You can target 1 "Penguin" monster you control; change that target to face-down Defense Position. You can only use this effect of "Dopenguin" once per turn.

 

[spoiler=1st Edit]If you control a "Penguin" monster, you can Special Summon this card from your hand. If this card is Special Summoned: You can change and number of face-up monsters you control to face-down Defense Position. While you control another monster, this card cannot be attacked. Other "Penguin" monsters you control cannot be destroyed by battle. You can only control 1 "Dopenguin".

 

 

This card was made with the intention of making Penguins as an archetype playable. I created this card to compliment them with what they do best: Be annoying. This card resets the effects of its peers like Nightmare Penguin and Penguin Soldier and gives them the ability to survive battle destruction. Combined with Nopenguin, the archetype will have some very threatening plays involving bouncing/banishing your opponent's cards and attacking directly with low-ATK monsters for game.

 

I did have a problem with the interaction between the second and third effect and was given the suggestion to omit the second effect. However, I think if I omitted the second effect, the card would be too weak since the opponent can just run it over and then run over the rest of your penguins--which was what this card was intended to fix.

 

[spoiler=Addressed Problems]

• Forms an attack lock if there were two face-up "Dopenguins".
  Fixed with the addition of "You can only control 1 "Dopenguin"."
   
• Interaction of second and third effects were too strong; however, I digressed with the abundance of non-battle removal in the current state of the game.
  Improved by softening battle immunity to only the first time "Penguin" monsters would be destroyed.
   
• Removed quick effect to make it not so overwhelming with its potent battle immunity.
  ​Re-added quick effect for versatility, after softening lock.

[Tinkerer]

Firstly, I just wanna say that I just restarted playing Disgaea on the DS, so I really appreciate that name and card art.

 

Second, I was just curious on why you replaced the Quick Effect Set with one that's on-summon. The quick effect one feels more versatile and can help out in certain tiny situations like if your opponent tries to Bottomless Trap Hole this card (or something else that would affect face-up cards).

 

I think it is a very well-rounded card. The fact it is a WATER that can SS itself enables it to be used as Link material, so even if you open 2 of them, it might not hurt too much. Its face-down effect could also come in with applications outside Penguins. For example, this could potentially have application in Subterrors as a startup play (though it would have been a bit more consistent if it had the quick effect over it working on SS).

[Armoire]

Firstly, I just wanna say that I just restarted playing Disgaea on the DS, so I really appreciate that name and card art.

 

Second, I was just curious on why you replaced the Quick Effect Set with one that's on-summon. The quick effect one feels more versatile and can help out in certain tiny situations like if your opponent tries to Bottomless Trap Hole this card (or something else that would affect face-up cards).

 

I think it is a very well-rounded card. The fact it is a WATER that can SS itself enables it to be used as Link material, so even if you open 2 of them, it might not hurt too much. Its face-down effect could also come in with applications outside Penguins. For example, this could potentially have application in Subterrors as a startup play (though it would have been a bit more consistent if it had the quick effect over it working on SS).

 

Thanks! I miss Disgea and Prinny popped in my head when I thought of Penguins.

 

The reason I replaced the Quick Effect with one that is on-summon was because the judgment I had during the contest was that it did too much for a low-level card. Therefore, because I did not want to forsake the interaction between its second and third effect, I decided to nerf its Setting effect instead. That way, Penguins don't benefit too much from it. 

 

Do you think it would be fine to re-include the Quick Effect setting again, given its battle immunity?

[Tinkerer]

Hmm... Honestly, I think the battle protection it affords to other Penguins should be the thing that's weakened. Maybe something like: "Once while this card is face-up on the field, if a 'Penguin' monster you control would be destroyed by battle, you can pay 500 LP instead"... Or something. That way, the locks won't be as hard to break, it'll have its quick effect for use alongside Nopenguin, and the protection can be reset at the cost of using its quick effect on itself.

[Armoire]

Hmm... Honestly, I think the battle protection it affords to other Penguins should be the thing that's weakened. Maybe something like: "Once while this card is face-up on the field, if a 'Penguin' monster you control would be destroyed by battle, you can pay 500 LP instead"... Or something. That way, the locks won't be as hard to break, it'll have its quick effect for use alongside Nopenguin, and the protection can be reset at the cost of using its quick effect on itself.

 

You just gave me an idea. Hopefully this update will make it better.

Instead of having Penguins unable to be destroyed by battle, I think I'll just change the effect to "The first time a "Penguin" monster you control would be destroyed by battle, it is not destroyed." or something like that.

 

Also re-adding the quick effect.

 

EDIT: Effect has been updated to suit feedback.

[Armoire]

Bumpin' for the penguin.

[Flash Flyer - Sakura]

(Considering I graded this earlier for task #2, it's only fair I review your changes and see if you read critique)

 

Like I told you when I graded this card, removing either the "cannot be attacked" effect or the protection one from original version would've made the card fine (and not overbearing). Though yes, the meta things were addressed.

 

That being said, I'm fine with the edit on the battle protection thing being "first time stuff gets attacked and would be killed" because that was one of the problems. At the same time, you have the "only 1" clause out, so you can get away with having this be a Quick Effect and no limitations on its SSing effect.

 

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So yeah, you did fine. Penguins need help anyway, but will take more to get them stronger (well, at least better monster pool and some more toys to help them deal with the current power players).