Zai.

[(GigaDrillBreaker)]

I'm going to be honest, I had a bit of trouble deciding how to go about this thread. The disagreements on this site have shattered friendships, torn people down, and just made a mess of the community as it stands.

 

In the other thread, Zai said that he believed a thread should be made about him, so that it wouldn't detract from the original discussion. There was a bit of discussion on who would make the thread, and I said I would. It only seemed fitting, since I was the first and most opposed to his modship. I thought about the best rhetoric to stir up a crowd, but honestly now that I'm actually typing that all just feels like a waste. I'm going to go about this the right way.

 

First, to Zai, I would like to formally and publicly request that you step down from modship. You have said yourself how busy you are, how you cannot devote the time needed to properly weigh in on matters in the mod forum. You told me earlier today that you would step down if the majority wanted you to, but really, that's not how it works. This isn't a recall election, and I don't think Flame firing you is a foreseeable outcome of all this. This isn't about what the majority believes is best. The choice comes down to you.

 

I don't think there is any real reason for you to be a mod. You spoke about your objectivity and approachability, and yet many concerns brought forward to you were ignored, denied, or even turned back around on those who brought them forward. You talked about how you could bring your activity up, to better connect to the community, as you had been all but unknown before then. You show up, but when you can't find the time to post in the mod forum aside from one bit in the course of a week, is that activity really meaningful? A few months ago, I asked you why you believed you should be a mod. You said that you were the best for RP, based on claims of being the best/most experienced at it, and that you plan to be a writer as a future career. Whether or not you are best is obviously subjective, but considering the low frequency of your activity, I wouldn't say you are most experienced by a long shot, and though your serious interest in writing is important, it is by no means unique to you. For example, Drew is currently writing a novel. CowCow has been independently writing fiction for years. I'm sure you see what I am getting at, here.

 

Even beyond this, you have done very little to progress the forum over this time. I spoke to you about it months ago, how being a leader is more than just revising rules and making sure they are followed. Just because nobody is coming to you doesn't mean there is nothing to be done. As a moderator, it is your responsibility to reach out toward others to help them.

 

You are busy. I understand that. It is a fair explanation. But it is no excuse. If you cannot perform up to the standards asked of you, that does not mean the standards should be lowered. You should step down, so that somebody who can reach those standards, or even exceed them, may rise up.

 

I have been made aware that there are more than a few others who would like to raise concerns about you, so this is the part where they all may do that. I have some more to say, but I will pace myself for now, so that things don't get too out of hand. Besides, it's quite likely my concerns will be brought up by others in the mean time.

[Yui]

Zai. My friend. I want to preface this by saying, that while I absolutely covet your position and have coveted it pretty much since you got it, taking it for myself is not my intent with everything I'm about to say. With the amount of mods the team has and who those mods are, if you step down or are kicked out or whatever, it seems likely that CowCow will be put in your seat instead of me, if anyone even has to fill your spot in. So don't think I'm out for your job or anything. There are three critical points I'd like to cover on my concerns regarding your modship, which are all directly tied to one another. Your ability to be and remain active, the emotional stress the job is putting on you, and your irl job. I'll leave the other issues to people who can remember and articulate that stuff better than me.

 

I'll start with the activity. Your aspiration for 2018 was to become more active and paint a better picture of yourself on the forum, which you've had mixed success with. Kind of. The same complaints about your modhood that started more or less as soon as you got the job are still being thrown around today, which implies a lack of progress, but as someone who hangs out with you fairly often - especially lately - I'm fully aware that this isn't for lack of trying. I even mentioned it in the restructuring thread.

Now, this is supposed to be the part where I say "But he's been improving on his presence and image on the forum this year, which should account for something", but it seems as if every time I start saying that, he starts falling off on that goal again. Or maybe he's just doing all that behind the scenes work I can't see anymore. Who knows ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

However, like I also said, every time it seems that you're starting to improve and get the ball of good vibes rolling, your activity takes a new hit, and a new wave of complaints comes in, and we start the whole cycle over. Which brings me to the second thing.

 

Your real life. You, my man, are a busy dude. I know it. You work a fairly dangerous job (perhaps less dangerous than I'm imagining, but imma pretend it's super-dangerous anyway because it makes you more badass in my head than you already are), but aside from that, it's also one where your schedule can sporadically shift from practically being on vacation to being absolutely swamped with work, based on what observations I'm able to make (I'm a very bad detective, keep in mind). This kind of inconsistency can be a problem for a moderator, as there's no telling what your availability will look like at some point in the future, while the mod team is having a theoretical critical discussion that requires a lot of presence and commitment from everybody. Cow mentioned, for instance, that you suddenly got especially busy around the time he became mod. Maybe a week from now you'll be all up in here for the entire month of March. Or maybe you'll just disappear off the face of the earth. It's kind of a gamble with your work schedule, I've noticed, which is troublesome.

 

It's a circumstance beyond your control, and that absolutely sucks. I get it. Not being able to do your best because of something you can't control sucks, and that brings me to my third thing. The impact moderation has had on you emotionally over the last year and some change. I'm going to be super-duper brief here because I'm fully aware that this isn't something I should go into detail in whilst posting publicly, but it isn't something that I can overlook as your pal and someone who cares for your happiness. Tl/dr, the impact it has on you isn't necessarily a positive one, and your real life definitely isn't helping matters any. If being on the mod team doesn't feel right, and/or if you aren't getting anything positive out of it, it will be better for you personally, to step down. I don't like seeing you upset from all the sheet you put up with man.

 

I think we've had this conversation before though. I'd prefer we don't have it a second time, since - much like your activity and work - it will just be a new cycle we get into every month or two. I'm not really sure how to wrap this post up, so I'm just going to cut it off here. Do what you think is right, but please think of your well-being before YCM's.

[LordCowCowCowCowCowCowCowCow]

*swaps out of mod uniform*

 

I suppose it's only fair I say something here. Especially since it's oddly silent which... it really shouldn't be. I am sure Zai knows that there's at least more than two with issues about this.

 

Zai knows, as I told him, I was concerned about him being a mod way back when it started. Because of how he often made RPs, made promises, then dropped it unless he was constantly told to do things.

He's made progress...but also regression.

And that's where my personal issue comes from. I've seen that he can be active in discussions and such but...too often this feels like a "New Years Resolution" type thing. Where he promises, and believes himself, that he'll fix the issues but then...falls back into old habits.

I'm not asking for absolute dedication but it's really tough to sit back and not say anything in my position.

 

I do still believe that Zai could've stepped up and he has the capability to do good things but at this point, and I think many people would agree, he's too often just...faded away only to come back in bursts of "I'll do better".

 

Like it or not there's been a lot of shifts in YCM and...I guess it comes down to can you actually keep up.

[Dad]

From a community perspective, I'm honestly saddened. Zai told me that he wanted to do something before he left staff. I told him to pick one, single project and to put his heart into it.

 

I haven't seen it because he simply doesn't have the time to dedicate to it.

 

I'm not angry. I'm not saddened. I'm disappointed.

[Blake]

When @@God Emperor Cow and I were promoted to Junior Moderators in mid-late January, we both went about reading the mod forum. I mostly focused on more recent events, while Cow took to reading everything in the forum. At the time, I didn't feel comfortable saying... anything in the mod forum, really. I felt like anything I could say could and would be used against me (which ended up being validated), so I mostly kept my thoughts on the state of the mod forum between Cow and @@Flame Dragon. Flame urged me to actually speak up after a little while, but I initially just discussed in PM with him.

 

While the majority of that is a discussion for another time, you may be surprised to learn that I actually gave Zai some praise in that private conversation. I could see that he had put effort into changing for the better, and I felt he genuinely cared about the forum. I'm not even saying that's not true, now.

 

But... from pretty much the moment we were promoted onward, he's been incredibly non-present, as Cow pointed out in the Restructuring thread. It's been a major backslide since then. I can understand being busy at work, but the criticisms leveled at him in this thread in regards to that are perfectly valid. I don't have a lot to add here, other than echoing Cow, but it is disappointing.

 

There are so many rabbit holes to go down in regards to Zai, and other than what I addressed above... I don't think any of them are his fault. It's ridiculous. There's a lot that needs to be discussed in the coming days.