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BREAKING NEWS: Unidentified Flying Cow crashes in North Dakota after numerous sightings reported.


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The unidentified flying cow was first reported after CowCow went missing while inside a livestock transport truck. Attempts to contact the company, Definitely Not Aliens Trucking, have yielded no results.

 

After the crash, Dad was seen in the area with soldiers, wondering about this mysterious cow and wondering why the hell he’s in the middle of nowhere in the first place. When a local conspiracy theorist asked Dad if he was planning a cover up, Dad said “Boi, you better cover yo’ mouth before I beat yo’ ass with the 12 Gauge Belt.”

 

Anyway, Dad and crew loaded the Unidentified Flying Cow on a truck owned by “Definitely Not Heading to Area Fiffy Dad Trucking,” but not before using his Tank Belt to whoop everyone’s ass with a seven mile radius of the crash as a warning. Finally, Dad can leave North Dakota....only to end up in South Dakota because that’s definitely not where Area Fifty Das is.

 

The current status of CowCow and the truck are just as mysterious as this unidentified flying cow.

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