Jump to content



Member Since 13 Nov 2008
Member ID: 85,151
Currently Not online
Offline Last Active Apr 11 2019 06:30 PM

#6615563 An Immortal Legend

Posted by Altαir on 10 May 2015 - 06:58 PM

Beautiful. I am absolutely in love with your prose.


It's like a dessert of which I can't get enough. It's light, acutely sweet, simplistic, and overall pleasing to the eye. I felt content throughout the reading, allow me to give an example:


"She seemed quite amused at the foreigner's blunder before her expression turned apologetic."


There's something so sweet about the narration here, it tells you so much about this girl in such a lithe way, but reveals a solf, calming tone that really permeates throughout the whole piece.


I do have one small comment. This story has a great amount of thematic potential (this could blow up into a full-on discourse on humanity and mortality), and I think you should write keeping that in mind. It might give a stronger life to the story, or maybe give you a stronger will to continue.



  • Aix likes this

#6118669 Apparently Pokemon is EVIL! O:

Posted by Altαir on 11 January 2013 - 11:09 PM

Anyways, I never understood why people put so much blame on the media for feelings/acts of violence in society.

Because the media is an extremely influential force upon this planet's sentient inhabitants, maybe? The very concept of media - that you can pick and choose what you want to watch/play, develops a unique character within each and all of us, exclusions being embryos at the earliest of stages. And when you have uniqueness, you have different, and sometimes unpleasant reactions and connections.

#6096515 YCM Christmas Game - Library

Posted by Altαir on 17 December 2012 - 10:54 PM

Grover was sitting on the floor silently skiming through a book on the enviroment while quietly devouring a cheese enchilada he smuggled in earlier. The book intrigued him, it discussed odder ways to help cultivate nature and counteract pollution in the world. To support the idea, the book consisted of 25% recycled paper, and 75% paper which did not come from trees, but rather other sources for paper. With the different colors and thickness, the book seemed arcane, and Grover would of assumed it was made long ago if the copyright wasn't dated for 2008. While reading, he couldn't help but chuckle under his breath when examining the section which described the mass murdur of pollution-inducing creatures, which the book claims was the best way to rid the destruction of nature. When he finished his enchilada, he dabbed the mess of food off his mouth and chin, and continued reading intensly.

#5303067 Tenacious Knight

Posted by Altαir on 22 June 2011 - 12:37 PM

Amazing card, it's very balanced. Though, shouldn't you replace the "If" with "When"?

The semicolon between, "You can discard 1 Level 5 or higher monster; negate the activation of the effect and destroy that card" means "to" and not "and", correct?


#5301253 Civilization

Posted by Altαir on 21 June 2011 - 05:55 PM

And what is wrong with wars, in terms of evolution? If anything, I think wars do lead to succession. Without wars, how can we ever learn from them? Wars may not solve problems, but they make it evident to the world - never make the mistake again.

Our nature is that we test, we establish, and we change. This is our evolution.

I'm a bit confused, though. When you mention "evolution", do you mean evolution or procession?

#5301201 Dreams.

Posted by Altαir on 21 June 2011 - 05:28 PM

I don't have a REM cycle. Instead, I have a cupcake dispenser.

I once had a dream where I had entered my nose, and I had to fight some strange monster made of my mucus. I had my friends with me - even so, we all were defeated. I then woke up right before the finishing blow, and found a nickel under my radiator. I wouldn't have found it if I didn't fall of my bed in shock.